Give me a clue, Cal. What ones? Some I cannot mention till certain stuff happens. Stuff like death! And even then I'll do it as polite as possible.
Keith, you had a BRAIN-FART too! Yea, Jean and Gladys. They are back together I think. I'll stop by Jeff's on my way to LV and get the official scoop. Will be arriving Friday (tomorrow) around noon unless I wake up late.
Here's my famous dog story. The actual way it happened but there is a 5% possibility that I have reached the wrong conclusion at the very end so I'll avoid mentioning the names of the parties involved in an effort to protect the innocent. Or in this case, the guilty.
Back in the days when Hawaii 5-0 was being shot at the Diamond Head Studios, we had kind of a wrap-party at the end of the 5-0 shooting schedule/season at our house on Analii Street cross the Kalanianioleole Highway from the Waialai Golf and Country Club. (I mention these names to refresh the memories of some of you who might have even been there and witnessed what I talk about below).
Back then and way before this party I mention above, I had a good habit of rescuing unwanted mutts from the local dog pound just down the road apiece. On one occasion I brought home a shaggy little mutt just out of puppyhood and named him THUMPER. Thumper became immediately attached to Hot Pants (a minature black Lab).
Months pass and THUMPER grows to Hot Pant's height. And as Thumper grows he gets smart (And I mean REAL SMART) while Hot Pants remains as stupid as usual but very loveable.
THUMPER's best dog-friend is HOT PANTS ... and HOT PANTS (named after Don "Hot Pants" Morocco) liked to follow every kid in the neighborhood while they all walked to school a couple of blocks away. And I would get a phone call from the Principal asking me to come on down and retrieve Hot Pants who was patiently waiting in the school-yard for the kids to get out and walk on back home with them.
One day Hot Pants wasn't home and I didn't get that usually expected phone call from the Principal but Thumper came running up the drive-way all hot and bothered and upset about something. I've often seen Lassie on TV trying to get someone to follow her in an effort to save a damsel in distress; and now I was watching Thumper doing the same damn thing .... and to be honest with ya I've never seen him watching any Lassie episode so I don't know where he learned this "Follow Me QUICK" trick of his.
So I finally got the message and followed him down the driveway and he started running and looked back expecting me to do the same. So we both ran down the road together towards Kalanianioleole Highway where he led me to Hot Pants who was half dead on the side of the highway. Thumper merely laid by his side, let out a dog whine,and looked up at me as if to say, "Do something, Stupid!"
So I picked up Hot Pants and was in the process of getting myself emotionally set to bury him in the front yard, but he was still breathing so me and Thumper carried him back to the house and got in my VW and placed Hot Pants on the passenger seat while THUMPER looked on from the rear.
THUMPER was very concerned. Almost just like a human. Definitely more human than dog-like.
So we rushed on down Kalanilanioleole Highway to the vets and he says, "Are you sure you want to save Hot Pants? He's in pretty bad shape and will require a lot of attention!"
And I sort of knew that Thumper would be really pissed off at me if we didn't try to save his favorite buddy so I said, "Do what you can, doc."
"OK, I'll call you when and if he'll be ready to come back home! I'll do my best but can't promise you anything for sure."
SO we left Hot Pants there and for the next few days, Thumper was pretty damn upset.
Damn upset until Hot Pants was released and returned home with more that 80 stitches holding him together. That made Thumper happy but we had to separate them in two different parts of the house until those stitches healed completely.
Some of us who knew Thumper well swore that he was more human that dog! He would do stuff that only humans attempt to do. Like ... sitting still and paying attention to boring conversations at BBQ'S and dinner parties, which brings us back to that Hawaii 5-0 wrap affair I mentioned earlier.
We're all having cocktails on the lanai overlooking the golf course and talking about various boring stuff that happened on and off the set this past week and one of the principal actors looks down and sees Thumper sitting below us and watching each of us as we tell our boring stories as if he actually understands what the hell we're talking about and is interested in what we have to say.
And the actor says, "Look at this dog! It's listening to us!"
So I proceed to tell everyone about how smart this Thumper dog is and to prove it I tell him to go get something and sure enough he runs off and returns with that "something" in his mouth waiting for me to take it. Plus the standard dog tricks which he obeys with a look like, "Is that all you think I can do, Stupid?! (He called me "Stupid" lots.)
And the actor is super impressed and says, "Wow! You should take that dog to Hollywood or better yet, let me take him tomorrow! He's more than brilliant!" And I laugh and head off in search of another beer and see how the steaks are coming along.
The next morning I get up with a hangover and notice that Thumper is not in the usual spot where Thumper is usually at. In fact he fails to show up at all throughout the day. SO we do the usual dog search thing, but to no avail and over time the sadness passes from each of us and Hot Pants too.
Then about a year later, I'm walking down the street and see a poster on a movie theater advertising "BENJI" and since Benji looks exactly like
Thumper, I pay my $5.25 cents and go inside to watch it.
About five minutes into the Benji scenes, I come to realize that I am seeing Thumper up there on that silver screen. This ain't no ordinary dog! This is definitely Thumper.
So I go home and start raising hell about someone stealing Thumper and making a movie star out of him and those who knew him well also go and see that Benji movie and feel exactly as I do. But others who did not know Thumper at all, say, "You're crazy!"
Eventually I sat back and let it pass and sort of got real proud that Thumper had hit the big-time and made a name for himself.
And I never even got an autograph! But I do know that he would have been proud to see me and Hot Pants if we ever had the opportunity to visit him in Hollywood.
All this stuff really happened. I'm not entirely sure that the real Thumper actually made it to the Silver Screen though. But 95% sure is close enough.
