Author Topic: Tonight I was approached by a Jehovah Witness.... (Read 3100 times)

knny187 · « **on:** July 17, 2008, 09:34:43 PM »

......while walking my dog. Even though it was dark & I got this big Rottweiler....I knew the two of them were going to stop say something. It's their life mission.

So this one said "excuse me sir....let me show you....."

I cut him off and said "get your shit out of my face"

He replied..."Have a good night"

I said "fucking die....drop dead"

it's a good think he didn't try petting my dog. He really likes people & would have wanted to play.

chaos · « **Reply #1 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:47:41 PM »

Well aren't you just the socialable little kunt?

knny187 · « **Reply #2 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:52:10 PM »

yeah....it's one of my most shining personality traits

candidizzle · « **Reply #3 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:53:11 PM »

i had two guys come to my door doing that shit for the mormons. funny thing is, i got a VERY homosexual vibe off these two 'men of god' !

knny187 · « **Reply #4 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:55:14 PM »

wow...gay religious people?

now there's a stretch

chaos · « **Reply #5 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:56:26 PM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 09:55:14 PM

wow...gay religious people?

now there's a stretch

What's the difference between a priest and acne?

Acne comes on a boys face after he turns 13.

candidizzle · « **Reply #6 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:58:02 PM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 09:55:14 PM

wow...gay religious people?

now there's a stretch

the short fat one had a lisp and goofy look and when i told him i wasnt interested in his talk he asked if there "was anything at all else i could do for you while were here ?"

i was like..uuuhhh wtf??!! did you just offere to suck my dick.

hahah (of course i didnt say that aloud, but its what i was thinking)

i just laughed and said no thanks

then he said, and in not making this up to try to sound sbig.. im nto big at all this guy is just a queer,...
he said
"not that i could do anything for you, other than maybe let you bench press me "

swear to god this happened

fuckin nuts

nicky.smth · « **Reply #7 on:** July 17, 2008, 09:58:45 PM »

Quote from: chaos on July 17, 2008, 09:56:26 PM

What's the difference between a priest and acne?

Acne comes on a boys face after he turns 13.

LMTO
laughing my testicles off

knny187 · « **Reply #8 on:** July 17, 2008, 10:02:35 PM »

Priests are gay?

is that possible?

chaos · « **Reply #9 on:** July 17, 2008, 10:04:17 PM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 10:02:35 PM

Priests are gay?

is that possible?

Not gay, knny, pedophiles, there is a difference, figure it out.

knny187 · « **Reply #10 on:** July 17, 2008, 10:06:32 PM »

Quote from: chaos on July 17, 2008, 10:04:17 PM

Not gay, knny, pedophiles, there is a difference, figure it out.

well....if a priest molested a young girl....that wouldn't make headlines

chaos · « **Reply #11 on:** July 17, 2008, 10:08:36 PM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 10:06:32 PM

well....if a priest molested a young girl....that wouldn't make headlines

Not until her psychologist dug up the repressed memory and she sued for millions.

knny187 · « **Reply #12 on:** July 17, 2008, 10:12:06 PM »

Quote from: chaos on July 17, 2008, 10:08:36 PM

Not until her psychologist dug up the repressed memory and she sued for millions.

Shit...millions would bother the vatican

gordiano · « **Reply #13 on:** July 17, 2008, 10:58:09 PM »

Quote from: candidizzle on July 17, 2008, 09:58:02 PM

the short fat one had a lisp and goofy look and when i told him i wasnt interested in his talk he asked if there "was anything at all else i could do for you while were here ?"

i was like..uuuhhh wtf??!! did you just offere to suck my dick. hahah (of course i didnt say that aloud, but its what i was thinking)

i just laughed and said no thanks

then he said, and in not making this up to try to sound sbig.. im nto big at all this guy is just a queer,...
he said
"not that i could do anything for you, other than maybe let you bench press me "

swear to god this happened

fuckin nuts

WTF? That's some creepy shit.... $:-\$

calfzilla · « **Reply #14 on:** July 18, 2008, 12:18:24 AM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 09:34:43 PM

......while walking my dog. Even though it was dark & I got this big Rottweiler....I knew the two of them were going to stop say something. It's their life mission.

So this one said "excuse me sir....let me show you....."

I cut him off and said "get your shit out of my face"

He replied..."Have a good night"

I said "fucking die....drop dead"

it's a good think he didn't try petting my dog. He really likes people & would have wanted to play.

Brutal attempt at trying to disrupt your cardio. Fucking religious nuts.

DK II · « **Reply #15 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:02:20 AM »

i was once approached by a Jehova's witness and i told him,

"I'm sorry, i'm buddhist. I don't believe in your god." and he replied "Well, what would god think about this"

to which i answered "I don't care, because i don't believe in him".

He just gave me a clueless stare and went off.

Kind of idiotic, being a missionary all the time.

ozman · « **Reply #16 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:05:48 AM »

where I live there are heaps of Moslems

the JW's and others don't even bother

KillerMonk · « **Reply #17 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:28:43 AM »

20 years ago a freind ansewered the door to these christians, he dropped his pants and said blow me.

It was funny because they called the police.The police came over to his house and asked him to refrain from doing this in the future, it was hilarious the cops could hardly keep a straight face

Wish i was 16 again.

DK II · « **Reply #18 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:36:04 AM »

Quote from: KillerMonk on July 18, 2008, 01:28:43 AM

20 years ago a freind ansewered the door to these christians, he dropped his pants and said blow me.

It was funny because they called the police.The police came over to his house and asked him to refrain from doing this in the future, it was hilarious the cops could hardly keep a straight face
Wish i was 16 again.

LOL!

A friend from highschool had almost the same story. He was fucking his gf when JW rang on the door. He just opened the door spotting a boner and asked them to watch, after that they could talk.

Needless to say, they never came again.

Tombo · « **Reply #19 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:47:46 AM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 09:52:10 PM

yeah....it's one of my most shining personality traits

ur mean

KillerMonk · « **Reply #20 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:52:10 AM »

Also had a Freind from Highschool who would always swear using the term "JESUS CHRIST" never fuck,shit.
His stepmom was very religous and use to give him a backhand across the face when he used this term, one time everytime she hit him he would shout "JESUS CHRIST" and make it worse.

SAMSON123 · « **Reply #21 on:** July 18, 2008, 01:57:07 AM »

Quote from: knny187 on July 17, 2008, 09:34:43 PM

......while walking my dog. Even though it was dark & I got this big Rottweiler....I knew the two of them were going to stop say something. It's their life mission.

So this one said "excuse me sir....let me show you....."

I cut him off and said "get your shit out of my face"

He replied..."Have a good night"

I said "fucking die....drop dead"

it's a good think he didn't try petting my dog. He really likes people & would have wanted to play.

THAT WILL GET YOU TO HEAVEN QUICK....

Kwon · « **Reply #22 on:** July 18, 2008, 02:22:54 AM »

Nice one Kenny, Does Fiddy Juice.

BroadStreetBruiser · « **Reply #23 on:** July 18, 2008, 03:48:17 AM »

disrespect to strangers is soooo cool.

local hero · « **Reply #24 on:** July 18, 2008, 04:50:57 AM »

hope you all realise you wont be one of the 1000000 people alowed into heaven now..... well done !