Olympics are boring!
So the 2008 Olympics are over, and what a dissapointment it was!
So many times I tried to tune in, only to be bored to tears with events like bicycle marathons or volleyball.
We've strayed from the true spirit of the games!
The heroic Greeks of antiquity would laugh or roll in their graves if they knew how badly we are mangling this esteemed competition. At the very start of the original Greek Olympics, the only event was the Stadion, or footrace. Later, more sports related to the soldiery were added, including boxing, wrestling, pancratium, and the javelin throw. Why is it that, today, badminton is an Olympic sport and Pancratium is not? Just imagine, Fedor Emelienko vs. Randy Couture for the gold! Instead we are stuck with figure skating and table tennis. Are these events appropriate for the Olympics? If we are to stick with the spirit of the original Olympics, which in my opinion is preferable, then the answer to that is a resounding NO!.
Eliminate weight classes; answer the questions that need to be answered.
I mean, let's face it, people tune in to the olympics to answer the important questions, like, "who is the strongest/fastest/toughest in the world?" It's the comic book fan in all of us that forces us to tune in. I think that, if like most of us, you were one of those kids that wondered if Superman could beat the Hulk (Superman would win of course) you will like my proprosal. Really, what I am proprosing is not something new; no, I actually want a return to the original spirit of the games! Consider that, there are some eight different weight classes for weightlifting in the games, and only one people care about. Like Ripley's Believe it Or Not! and Guinness, the Olympics needs to be a comeptition of absolute answers. Does that mean 130 pound guys lifting 4 times their body weight need to stop competing? Of course not, they just don't belong in a competition as prestigious as the Olympics.
A "weightlifter" hoist some puny weight in the air:
So many obscure games, medals lose their value; Olympics lose integrity.
Let's face it, nobody outside of the hometown cares if someone wins a gold medal in sail-boating! Tae Kwon Do, a Korean martial art, was added to the list of Olympic sports. Guess who won most of the medals in Tae Kwon Do? Korea, of course. Seeing as the Olympics are a very international competition, the only sports included should be those with a very international appeal; or, otherwise, there should be something universal inherent to them. During the 1900 Olympic games, a Basque Pelota (don't ask) match was contested. Spain took gold; France took silver. Guess how many teams competed in this so-called sport? Only two; Span and France. This sort of absurdity still occurs today. Incidents like this bring to mind news reports that pop up every once in a while, where some kid in a mid-west hick town gets elected treasurer because nobody decided to run. And why do we need 10 different running (or swimming) events,
when it only takes one to answer who the fastest is?
Spain defeats France and takes gold in a game nobody gives a rat's ass about:
Three New Criteria for Olympic Sports: Universal Appeal, Absolutism, Tradition.
One issue that keeps popping up when the IOC decides who will host the games is the tendency to award hosting rights to more prosperous countries. Besides the aforementioned advantages of a stripped-down olympia, another advantage is the reduced cost. A stripped down Olympia makes it possible to be held in poorer host nations.
Under the new criteria, only the following sports will be included in future Olympics:
Stadion
Marathon
Swimming
Boxing
Wrestling
Pancratium
Fencing
Archery
Shooting
Equestrianism
High Jump
Gymnastics
Weightlifting
Tug O' War
Pentathlon
Soccer
*The Pentathlon will include a short foot-race, hurdles, long-jump, pole-vault, and javelin.
So there you have it! A new, yet ancient Olympia; full of absolutes, steeped in tradition, and with more international appeal.
