1. Ignore those screams from Ron's basement. It's just the TV.
2. "Edward! If you don't do something with that law degree, your father and I are going to start charging you rent!"
3. "Responding to complaints of a strong smell, local police today discovered the body of a man trapped on an exercise bench beneath a 135lb barbell."
4. "Nobody, and I mean
nobody, makes fun of my boys!" - Uncle Joe.
5. "We're sorry. The number you are trying to reach has been disconnected or is no longer in service."

6. 'Escorting' in Japan.
7. Hangin' with The Hoff. Jimmy, that is.
8. I have proof of life but I need $50,000 to hire Russell Crowe. All contributions appreciated.
9. Now you know what happens during the 16th minute. Keep an eye out on Dancing With The Stars.
10. He took the internet seriously.