Speaking of ownage.. thieving ho gets nailed by minivan

[Brixtonbulldog]

Sooooo..... today I get to one of my stores and the manager is running behind some fatty towards the door.  She had a shit ton of product in her purse and tried to make it to the getaway car with her bf behind the wheel.  HE SPEEDS OFF AND LEAVES THE BITCH!!! HAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!1 YESSSSSSS..

Thennnnnnn.... I chased her and tackled her in the mud, took her purse with my stuff in it, and started walking her back to the store.  And then she starts running again right into traffic..

..AND GETS CREAMED BY A MINIVAN!!!!!!! OMFG!!!!! fucking hilarious.  She flew a few feet and skidded another few.  She lives, sadly, but it actually knocked her pants down to her knees so all 200lbs of her fat junkie ass was hanging out in the middle of rush hour traffic as she gets up and runs toward the curb.  Anyway, cops got her for theft and CDS possession (heroin).

Good stuff.. productive day  

[IrishMuscle84]

What kind of store do you own?

[Brixtonbulldog]

What kind of store do you own?

haha.. no no.  i work for a big chain store as loss prevention

[tonymctones]

hahahah good stuff that would make my day 

[kiwiol]

That's hilarious, Brixton. Too bad there isn't a video of it, lol.

[chaos]

haha.. no no.  i work for a big chain store as loss prevention

Translated = rent-a-cop.

BS on the story without pics, bitesonbuttplugs.

[Brixtonbulldog]

That's hilarious, Brixton. Too bad there isn't a video of it, lol.

yes.. unfortunately i received some negative attention for my antics inside the stores so most of my current excitement happens outside so as to avoid cameras.  i do have some highlight videos from my first year however i wont be putting any on youtube until i change companies or move out of the field all together.  

you're right, tho.. it was amazing.  my gf does loss prevention for another chain and she had just come to see me so she helped out a lot.  she gets to go to work and tell everyone all the crazy (stupid) things i do that are completely against the rules, lol.

one of my favs is waiting until a female booster is just streaking out the door and if i do it just right i can come up behind them without them seeing and grab them by their pony tail ..hahahahaah!!!! ever see a sprinting dog run out of leash?!?!    absolutely classic!!

[Brixtonbulldog]

Translated = rent-a-cop.

BS on the story without pics, bitesonbuttplugs.

negative, "gayass."  i dont wear a uniform and im not security.  more like a mystery shopper with a license to accost drug addicts.  here are two pics taken after of the stuff and the fatty.  im trying to pull stills from the video but it keeps freezing on me

[chaos]

negative, "gayass."  i dont wear a uniform and im not security.  more like a mystery shopper with a license to accost drug addicts.  here are two pics taken after of the stuff and the fatty.  im trying to pull stills from the video but it keeps freezing on me

Where's the heroin?

How come she's not all muddy?

Sooooo..... today I get to one of my stores and the manager is running behind some fatty towards the door.  She had a shit ton of product in her purse and tried to make it to the getaway car with her bf behind the wheel.  HE SPEEDS OFF AND LEAVES THE BITCH!!! HAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!1 YESSSSSSS..

Thennnnnnn.... I chased her and tackled her in the mud, took her purse with my stuff in it, and started walking her back to the store.  And then she starts running again right into traffic..

..AND GETS CREAMED BY A MINIVAN!!!!!!! OMFG!!!!! fucking hilarious.  She flew a few feet and skidded another few.  She lives, sadly, but it actually knocked her pants down to her knees so all 200lbs of her fat junkie ass was hanging out in the middle of rush hour traffic as she gets up and runs toward the curb.  Anyway, cops got her for theft and CDS possession (heroin).

Good stuff.. productive day  

[Brixtonbulldog]

Where's the heroin?

How come she's not all muddy?

Her pants were soaked and the heroin was in her shoe.  Actually, I didn't even know about it until the ofc. called me back and said she found it during in-processing.

[WillGrant]

Her pants were soaked and the heroin was in her shoe.  Actually, I didn't even know about it until the ofc. called me back and said she found it during in-processing.

Did you fu ck her?

[Brixtonbulldog]

Did you fu ck her?

no.. it's against company policy to fu ck a shoplifter, lol