Regarding Who I Was, Who I am, Why I Don't Change (no ego)(yes serious)

[disturbia]

29


43


So people on here ask why I dont try to achieve the look I had before. Well first of all I am 44, but that is zero part of the reason.  I am not driven by an inner force to be lean and look better. It makes zero difference to me that I carry this fat. My mental issues have been clearly stated and they play a role, but I find no reason or drive to look like that again. Also, I like to eat.  There is little force in me to accomplish much in life to be honest.  I am driven by outside forces, one of which IS NOT money.  I wouldnt do shit for money, means nothing to me.  If the day came when that elusive outside reason came for me to get lean, yeah it would probably happen.  The only outside force that kind of gives me a little irk to do it is knowing how staggeringly much better I would look leaned out than Vince Goodrum.  Yeah, that would be kinda sweet.  I beak on here but I dont hate anyone except for 1 person and 1 only. Adonis. I could kill him, and not feel bad. Easily.  I like getbig, its fun and entertaining.

But overall, I dont lean out because  I am lazy, I have no inner drive, I require outside reasons to do something.

[Wiggs]

Avesher Principles - Chapter I

[disturbia]

Avesher Principles - Chapter I

dont see it moving up the NY Times bestseller list 

[YngiweRhoads]

In all honesty, it sounds like you've just described the average person.

[Wiggs]

dont see it moving up the NY Times bestseller list 

NY Times?  Bah!  It's a Getbig bestseller and that's all that matters.

[Mr Nobody]

29


43


So people on here ask why I dont try to achieve the look I had before. Well first of all I am 44, but that is zero part of the reason.  I am not driven by an inner force to be lean and look better. It makes zero difference to me that I carry this fat. My mental issues have been clearly stated and they play a role, but I find no reason or drive to look like that again. Also, I like to eat.  There is little force in me to accomplish much in life to be honest.  I am driven by outside forces, one of which IS NOT money.  I wouldnt do shit for money, means nothing to me.  If the day came when that elusive outside reason came for me to get lean, yeah it would probably happen.  The only outside force that kind of gives me a little irk to do it is knowing how staggeringly much better I would look leaned out than Vince Goodrum.  Yeah, that would be kinda sweet.  I beak on here but I dont hate anyone except for 1 person and 1 only. Adonis. I could kill him, and not feel bad. Easily.  I like getbig, its fun and entertaining.

But overall, I dont lean out because  I am lazy, I have no inner drive, I require outside reasons to do something.

So how do survive dude, poker is come and go how. Seems you had a good life once what happened? The pics show a nice looking dude with muscles (no homo) something went south.

[El Diablo Blanco]

So people on here ask why I dont try to achieve the look I had before. Well first of all I am 44, but that is zero part of the reason.  I am not driven by an inner force to be lean and look better. It makes zero difference to me that I carry this fat. My mental issues have been clearly stated and they play a role, but I find no reason or drive to look like that again. Also, I like to eat.  There is little force in me to accomplish much in life to be honest.  I am driven by outside forces, one of which IS NOT money.  I wouldnt do shit for money, means nothing to me.  If the day came when that elusive outside reason came for me to get lean, yeah it would probably happen.  The only outside force that kind of gives me a little irk to do it is knowing how staggeringly much better I would look leaned out than Vince Goodrum.  Yeah, that would be kinda sweet.  I beak on here but I dont hate anyone except for 1 person and 1 only. Adonis. I could kill him, and not feel bad. Easily.  I like getbig, its fun and entertaining.

But overall, I dont lean out because  I am lazy, I have no inner drive, I require outside reasons to do something.

great opportunity for someone to commit murder and pin it on disturbia.

[Marty Champions]

29


43


So people on here ask why I dont try to achieve the look I had before. Well first of all I am 44, but that is zero part of the reason.  I am not driven by an inner force to be lean and look better. It makes zero difference to me that I carry this fat. My mental issues have been clearly stated and they play a role, but I find no reason or drive to look like that again. Also, I like to eat.  There is little force in me to accomplish much in life to be honest.  I am driven by outside forces, one of which IS NOT money.  I wouldnt do shit for money, means nothing to me.  If the day came when that elusive outside reason came for me to get lean, yeah it would probably happen.  The only outside force that kind of gives me a little irk to do it is knowing how staggeringly much better I would look leaned out than Vince Goodrum.  Yeah, that would be kinda sweet.  I beak on here but I dont hate anyone except for 1 person and 1 only. Adonis. I could kill him, and not feel bad. Easily.  I like getbig, its fun and entertaining.

But overall, I dont lean out because  I am lazy, I have no inner drive, I require outside reasons to do something.

just eat the kale green sandwiches like i told you, dont STRESS about leans, No need to write out creative dramas here leave that to me to set mothermcnickwiggers straight in spirituality and politics as well a joint effort in technology shared by brother Rami

[Tapeworm]

Instead of looking at it as 'going on a diet' or 'getting lean' or 'losing weight,' just be someone who lives well.  That is it's own reward.  Maybe you'll lose weight, maybe not, but I get the sense that your problems are manifested in more ways than just carrying a few lbs.  No flame.

My ex has severe depression and once told me she can't find the motivation or the right mindset to do the things she knows she should (get out of bed, clean her house, etc).  She's been that way for so long I suggested she give up lying there trying to generate the right mindset and just go through the motions of what she would be doing if she had that magical mindset, and after a week or two of having bills paid on time and a clean house I bet some optimism would arrive all on its own, without any mental wrestling being required at all.  

Just go through the motions of living well for a few weeks Av, even if you can't think of a reason to do it.  What have you got to lose?

[TrueGrit]

Ave, what diets have you tried?

You still have hair and the same bone structure. Falcon type leans meanz hoes and happiness. It's not too late.

[disturbia]

So how do survive dude, poker is come and go how. Seems you had a good life once what happened? The pics show a nice looking dude with muscles (no homo) something went south.

sigh
k heres the truth
Due to my borderline personality disorder mainly with other issues, I have a long history of kicking the hell out of managers, bosses, employers etc etc. I have no ability to respond to authority in a positive manner. Due to this the court systems and government have deemed me unfit to work, and therefore have placed me on a modified form of disability.  It allows me a much higher monthly amount than normal disability because it is in essence "forced".

The poker is true. I am staked by a guy who pays my buy ins and in turn he gets 50% of my winnings. But ya it is come and go, however I never risk my own money.

[Mr Nobody]

sigh
k heres the truth
Due to my borderline personality disorder mainly with other issues, I have a long history of kicking the hell out of managers, bosses, employers etc etc. I have no ability to respond to authority in a positive manner. Due to this the court systems and government have deemed me unfit to work, and therefore have placed me on a modified form of disability.  It allows me a much higher monthly amount than normal disability because it is in essence "forced".

The poker is true. I am staked by a guy who pays my buy ins and in turn he gets 50% of my winnings. But ya it is come and go, however I never risk my own money.

So its a problem with Authority it seems. Same problem here bro but keep drinking it down I may snap one day. This society has set us up to fail.

[Vince B]

sigh
k heres the truth
Due to my borderline personality disorder mainly with other issues, I have a long history of kicking the hell out of managers, bosses, employers etc etc. I have no ability to respond to authority in a positive manner. Due to this the court systems and government have deemed me unfit to work, and therefore have placed me on a modified form of disability.  It allows me a much higher monthly amount than normal disability because it is in essence "forced".

The poker is true. I am staked by a guy who pays my buy ins and in turn he gets 50% of my winnings. But ya it is come and go, however I never risk my own money.

I am curious about what treatments you have had for BPD and if you think you have been helped by any. Borderlines often have depression but they are separate mental disorders. Bashing your bosses was a neat way to not have to work anymore and get paid by the government!! 

[disturbia]

I am curious about what treatments you have had for BPD and if you think you have been helped by any. Borderlines often have depression but they are separate mental disorders. Bashing your bosses was a neat way to not have to work anymore and get paid by the government!! 

shhhh I have a disorder,....it wasnt a plan   

[odilly]

do you think if i move to saskatchewa n and kick the piss out of a few employer i can get on the josh plan

[Mr Nobody]

I am curious about what treatments you have had for BPD and if you think you have been helped by any. Borderlines often have depression but they are separate mental disorders. Bashing your bosses was a neat way to not have to work anymore and get paid by the government!! 

Could this be the reason Goodrum lives in the woods in a trailer?

[disturbia]

do you think if i move to saskatchewa n and kick the piss out of a few employer i can get on the josh plan

I have the manual I can send you

[Flexb]

29


43


So people on here ask why I dont try to achieve the look I had before. Well first of all I am 44, but that is zero part of the reason.  I am not driven by an inner force to be lean and look better. It makes zero difference to me that I carry this fat. My mental issues have been clearly stated and they play a role, but I find no reason or drive to look like that again. Also, I like to eat.  There is little force in me to accomplish much in life to be honest.  I am driven by outside forces, one of which IS NOT money.  I wouldnt do shit for money, means nothing to me.  If the day came when that elusive outside reason came for me to get lean, yeah it would probably happen.  The only outside force that kind of gives me a little irk to do it is knowing how staggeringly much better I would look leaned out than Vince Goodrum.  Yeah, that would be kinda sweet.  I beak on here but I dont hate anyone except for 1 person and 1 only. Adonis. I could kill him, and not feel bad. Easily.  I like getbig, its fun and entertaining.

But overall, I dont lean out because  I am lazy, I have no inner drive, I require outside reasons to do something.

I dig that honesty

[pellius]

The halfway house is just adjacent to the gym that I train at. The guys there, once you're in as they tend to be very distrustful of everyone, are some of the greatest guys around. They're the type that has your back and will walk with you to the gates of hell and back. They're the ones you want by your side when the fists or bullets start flying.

But some guys just aren't cut out to punch a time clock, tuck in their shirt, put on a tie, having to say "yes, mam" to some whiny bitch boss who tells you to "think outside the box." Having to answer the phone with the company pitch line instead of just "hello" like a normal person. Having to sit through a performance review by a fat, balding, ass kisser who alway has beads of sweat on his forehead and bits of white saliva on the corners on his lips who tells you, "I want to see a little bit more happy out of you. Think of us as your family and everyday is Christmas morning."

Some guys, when surrounded by phonies, ass kissers and status seekers , just want to take a deep breath, spit on their hands, raise the Black Flag and start slitting throats.

[disturbia]

The halfway house is just adjacent to the gym that I train at. The guys there, once you're in as they tend to be very distrustful of everyone, are some of the greatest guys around. They're the type that has your back and will walk with you to the gates of hell and back. They're the ones you want by your side when the fists or bullets start flying.

But some guys just aren't cut out to punch a time clock, tuck in their shirt, put on a tie, having to say "yes, mam" to some whiny bitch boss who tells you to "think outside the box." Having to answer the phone with the company pitch line instead of just "hello" like a normal person. Having to sit through a performance review by a fat, balding, ass kisser who alway has beads of sweat on his forehead and bits of white saliva on the corners on his lips who tells you, "I want to see a little bit more happy out of you. Think of us as your family and everyday is Christmas morning."

Some guys, when surrounded by phonies, ass kissers and status seekers , just want to take a deep breath, spit on their hands, raise the Black Flag and start slitting throats.

great post

[pellius]

"Thank God for the rain which has helped wash away the garbage and trash off the sidewalks.... All the animals come out at night - whores, skunk pussies, buggers, queens, fairies, dopers, junkies, sick, venal. Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets."

-- Robert DeNiro as Travis Bickle, Taxi Driver

[outby43]

The halfway house is just adjacent to the gym that I train at. The guys there, once you're in as they tend to be very distrustful of everyone, are some of the greatest guys around. They're the type that has your back and will walk with you to the gates of hell and back. They're the ones you want by your side when the fists or bullets start flying.

But some guys just aren't cut out to punch a time clock, tuck in their shirt, put on a tie, having to say "yes, mam" to some whiny bitch boss who tells you to "think outside the box." Having to answer the phone with the company pitch line instead of just "hello" like a normal person. Having to sit through a performance review by a fat, balding, ass kisser who alway has beads of sweat on his forehead and bits of white saliva on the corners on his lips who tells you, "I want to see a little bit more happy out of you. Think of us as your family and everyday is Christmas morning."

Some guys, when surrounded by phonies, ass kissers and status seekers , just want to take a deep breath, spit on their hands, raise the Black Flag and start slitting throats.

Just curious what you do for a living Pellius?  Or if retired how did you make your living?

[Mr Nobody]

The halfway house is just adjacent to the gym that I train at. The guys there, once you're in as they tend to be very distrustful of everyone, are some of the greatest guys around. They're the type that has your back and will walk with you to the gates of hell and back. They're the ones you want by your side when the fists or bullets start flying.

But some guys just aren't cut out to punch a time clock, tuck in their shirt, put on a tie, having to say "yes, mam" to some whiny bitch boss who tells you to "think outside the box." Having to answer the phone with the company pitch line instead of just "hello" like a normal person. Having to sit through a performance review by a fat, balding, ass kisser who alway has beads of sweat on his forehead and bits of white saliva on the corners on his lips who tells you, "I want to see a little bit more happy out of you. Think of us as your family and everyday is Christmas morning."

Some guys, when surrounded by phonies, ass kissers and status seekers , just want to take a deep breath, spit on their hands, raise the Black Flag and start slitting throats.

I have done this for quite sometime nice post bro. Now trying to find another way we have all been trained to fit into some stupid ass company as stated.

[pellius]

Just curious what you do for a living Pellius?  Or if retired how did you make your living?

YGM. How about you?

[pellius]

Couple of guys that don't fit into this feminized, politically correct, status-seeking society but ones that I would trust my life with as they could trust theirs with me.