http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/nva/m4w/1658295306.htmlLooking for my soulmate - 25 (Leesburg, VA)
Date: 2010-03-23, 8:10PM EDT
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Hi. I'm looking for a suitable mate.
My mate must not be of such low standards as to use this website to find a companion; instead it should be her ugly friend recommending this ad to her.
About you:
You are the ugly friend.
About your hot friend:
She must stand exactly 5 foot 10 inches, exactly half an inch under my height, and she must remain half an inch under my height at all times.
She must have natural blond hair and natural green eyes. Bright green.
Her weight must exceed 110 pounds.
Her weight must not exceed 115 pounds.
She must be beautiful without the use of make-up, which is restricted, and must maintain this beauty until at least the age of 55.
She must know how to cook, to perfection, the following meals:
1. Pancakes, eggs and bacon
2. BLT
3. Steak, shrimp and potatoes
And must cook these meals every day at breakfast, lunch and dinner respectively.
She must have her own car; it must be a manual transmission.
She must be available to chauffeur me around when I desire.
She must not take longer than 10 minutes in the bathroom at a time.
She must limit her water usage to 3 gallons per day.
She must limit herself to 2 bathroom trips per day.
She must be willing to engage in the act of procreation a minimum of 5 times a day until she bears a total of 3 children, all male, without exceeding her weight limitations.
About me:
Details about myself are given on a need-to-know basis and you do not need to know.
That is all. If your hot friend is perfect; tell her to reply immediately with her picture, height, weight, phone number and when she would like to wed.
