Most of all. I learned what it takes to get that big. Extreme amounts of food and gear, being very, very unhealthy. Doing very unnatural things to your body.
The glamour is all gone for me. When I see a huge dude I can appreciate what he did to get that big. But let's face it, it's 95% drugs.
It's just a drug game.
When I was a kid, in the 80's and 90's, like most of us, I believed they took the sups, trained hard, were good citizens, making a clean living from their chosen sport. And when they said they were natural, we believed it.
Now, we know G4P, crime, boatloads of drugs, narcissism, back-stabbing, force-feeding, lying, cheating, sponging is just another day at Venice Gold's, the mecca... and so, we must move on, slightly scarred, bit hurt and disappointed. Like you said, appreciate what it takes, but with the knowledge of the dirty side, and an open mind...
I've had the displeasure of doing biz with bbers, in the sup industry, and know 1st hand that their word means very little, their priorities are skewed. The real market is the wide-eyed uninitiated kids that want to look like John Cena (not too big

), and so the cycle continues...