Author Topic: Back from WasteOfTimeMania Report (Read 7267 times)

LurkerNoMore · « **on:** April 04, 2011, 07:55:22 AM »

Pure wrestling fans prepare to cry. First and foremost. This was NOT Wrestlemania. This was a bad Monday Night Raw with another name.

Observations first :

They claimed 71612 in attendance, I don't know how accurate that is but it was only about 80% full. We were seated midway through on our tickets but we got a policeman that knew my sister to move us to the 9th row from the ring after the first match because they were empty.

Biggest pops of the night :
Cena (he really is their golden boy)
HHH tombstone on Taker
Santino hitting the cobra and doing his little trumpet dance

The Rock sucks on the mic. Used to be he had flow, spontanity and great timing. Not anywhere. He just basically did nothing but assume his last role from the movie Faster and stand there hyperventilating intensely and staring off into space. Even his catch phrases failed to throw much life out to the crowd. And the habit of him starting to speak each time from a bent over with mic down wind up pose is just beyond lame and stupid. And he did this every time he resumed talking. At least 8-9 times in the course of opening the show alone.

And these guest hosts are full of shit anyway. All they do is open the show and then appear in a backstage video and appear at the end? Aren't they supposed to fucking HOST the show? Do interviews in the ring, introductions, etc..

First match up was Bryan v Sheamus. Lumber jack match with bunch of scrubs surrounding the ring. Double countout. Teddy now restarts the match as a battle royal and the Khali wins. WTF?

Khali being in WM is bad enough, Khali winning a match at WM is atrocious.
Grade "F"

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #1 on:** April 04, 2011, 07:58:36 AM »

Next up was Alberto losing to Edge for the World Championship. This match was before the divas, before the 8 man tag crap, before Lawler, etc... so much for this belt having any value. Decent match, back and forth action. Only draw back was the predictable post match smash up of the car.

Grade "B"

Rhodes beat Mysterio. Mysterio with his usual hyperchoregraphed set up moves and spots that anyone in wrestling land can spot 10 minutes before he hits them. Good win by Cody.

Grade "C"

Orton beat Punk. Probably best match of the night. Not saying much though. Punk pretty much dominated.

Grade solid "B"

Playboy · « **Reply #2 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:01:49 AM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on April 04, 2011, 07:55:22 AM

Pure wrestling fans prepare to cry. First and foremost. This was NOT Wrestlemania. This was a bad Monday Night Raw with another name.

Observations first :

They claimed 71612 in attendance, I don't know how accurate that is but it was only about 80% full. We were seated midway through on our tickets but we got a policeman that knew my sister to move us to the 9th row from the ring after the first match because they were empty.

Biggest pops of the night :
Cena (he really is their golden boy)
HHH tombstone on Taker
Santino hitting the cobra and doing his little trumpet dance

The Rock sucks on the mic. Used to be he had flow, spontanity and great timing. Not anywhere. He just basically did nothing but assume his last role from the movie Faster and stand there hyperventilating intensely and staring off into space. Even his catch phrases failed to throw much life out to the crowd. And the habit of him starting to speak each time from a bent over with mic down wind up pose is just beyond lame and stupid. And he did this every time he resumed talking. At least 8-9 times in the course of opening the show alone.

And these guest hosts are full of shit anyway. All they do is open the show and then appear in a backstage video and appear at the end? Aren't they supposed to fucking HOST the show? Do interviews in the ring, introductions, etc..

First match up was Bryan v Sheamus. Lumber jack match with bunch of scrubs surrounding the ring. Double countout. Teddy now restarts the match as a battle royal and the Khali wins. WTF? Khali being in WM is bad enough, Khali winning a match at WM is atrocious.
Grade "F"

Huh???
Cena got booed left, right and centre. He tried to do that ridiculous choir boy entrance and the crowd was booing him hard. When the Rock hit his Rock Bottom on Cena the crowd woke up again. Rock as usual was gold on the stick and owned everyone.

I agree with the rest.

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #3 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:04:30 AM »

8 man tag match. Huge pop for Santino. Corre absolutely demolished. Think nWo B listers but worse. Santino with the cobra to set up for Show's knock out punch.
Grade "B" (based on what was possible to work with given the set up and wrestlers)

Morrison, Trish and Snooki win. Big surprise with Snooki's cartwheel-backflip-backflip corner smash. Snooki with the cartwheel splash to win.

Grade "C"

Lawler beats Cole. No wait... he didn't. Grade "F". Not even Stone Cold could make this shitfest entertaining. Lawler has been whining and wishing for years for a Wrestlemania match and this is what he gets?

A match with a non wrestler that he doesn't even win? They should have at least allowed him to hit his old piledriver out of pity. Stunners to Swagger, Booker T and the other suit in the ring afterwards. (Think it was Josh, wasn't paying attention though)

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #4 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:10:34 AM »

Taker and Triple HHH face off in a race around the mat to find a missing contact lens in our next bout.
Borefest that was beyond boring. At least HHH stopped that stupid silly old school bullshit. That is beyond stupid when he does that. For a street fight, it was very contained. Minimum brawling outside the ring. No brawling through the fans though. In the end, HHH sort of sleepwalked into the lamest MMA submission hold used in wrestling today. HHH deserves an Academy Award for his performance here. He carried this entire match from beginning to end.

Grade "D". Only HHH saved it from being a complete "F"

Miz retains over Cena. No surprise. Rock had already said he was going to get involved and fuck Cena up. So no surprises here. Again, this was below Monday Night Raw quality.
Grade "C"

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #5 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:17:31 AM »

Other observations :

Most popular shirt was Rocks - I Bring It shirt.

Whole lot of 40+ year old men walking around with homemade title belts.

The Ric Flair WOOOOOO scream is probably still echoing in the building. Seems the people who could do it the worst had the loudest voices. Go figure.

No tag team title match. No IC title match. More worthless belts.

Weirdest outfit. Some 35+ year old dressed like CM Punk. Shorty short tights, boots, boot pads, etc.. perfect replica. Except he obviously had a 12" dildo stuffed in the front of the trunks. Or maybe that is where he was carrying his wallet, keys, gatorade bottle and poster sign. He was ahead of us in line and they refused him entrance.

It was a foregone conclusion that Shawn Michaels would NOT be interfering the the Taker HHH match. too many people thought he would but dude was there to relax the entire weekend.

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #6 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:18:51 AM »

Quote from: Playboy on April 04, 2011, 08:01:49 AM

Huh???
Cena got booed left, right and centre. He tried to do that ridiculous choir boy entrance and the crowd was booing him hard. When the Rock hit his Rock Bottom on Cena the crowd woke up again. Rock as usual was gold on the stick and owned everyone.

I agree with the rest.

I don't know where you were sitting but the entire building was popping for Cena.

Go look at the Rocks past mic work and compare to this. He stunk. The only funny thing he said was the line about May being a divasaurus.

Playboy · « **Reply #7 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:20:41 AM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on April 04, 2011, 08:18:51 AM

I don't know where you were sitting but the entire building was popping for Cena.

Go look at the Rocks past mic work and compare to this. He stunk. The only funny thing he said was the line about May being a divasaurus.

I heard Rocky chants left right and centre and Cena sucks chants.

Thin Lizzy · « **Reply #8 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:22:46 AM »

Good report.

WWE is gonna have to face the reality that PPV is dead. Going forward, people aren't gonna shell out $50 to see the same matches they see on Raw and Smacksdown week after week.

I don't know why TNA even bothers with PPV. What do they sell? 20-30k?

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #9 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:44:37 AM »

Quote from: Playboy on April 04, 2011, 08:20:41 AM

I heard Rocky chants left right and centre and Cena sucks chants.

What area were you sitting in?

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #10 on:** April 04, 2011, 08:47:35 AM »

Quote from: Thin Lizzy on April 04, 2011, 08:22:46 AM

Good report.

WWE is gonna have to face the reality that PPV is dead. Going forward, people aren't gonna shell out $50 to see the same matches they see on Raw and Smacksdown week after week.

I don't know why TNA even bothers with PPV. What do they sell? 20-30k?

When they did away with jobbers and squash matches, they did away with how they actually made STARS out of the higher performers. Used to be Warlord would crush people for months before meeting up with some other midcarder of equal status down the road at the PPV. The other one had won his squash matches too. It made them appear on equal footing so you were really interested in seeing how it played out.

Now... nothing. They just give away PPV quality matches on tv. Just watch... I bet you anything they will follow up on RAW tonight with some kind of title change.

Thin Lizzy · « **Reply #11 on:** April 04, 2011, 09:14:06 AM »

Good point.

On Sunday morning, I caught a rerun of Smackdown. There was a match between members of the Corre and Santino & Koslov. At the end, there was a big run-in with Big Show, Kane and other Corre guys. While they're all brawling, the announcers says, "Can you imagine what it's going to be like when these teams meet at Wrestlemania?"

Meanwhile, I'm sitting there thinking, "Why do I have to 'imagine' it? I'm watching it, right now!"

Playboy · « **Reply #12 on:** April 04, 2011, 10:51:01 AM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on April 04, 2011, 08:44:37 AM

What area were you sitting in?

Wasn't there. I watched it on a big screen but if you were there, i'll take your word for it.

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #13 on:** April 04, 2011, 10:54:20 AM »

I was there. 9th row from ringside. The mics are generally picking up from one or two areas at a time. There was big sections of Cena haters around the mid levels but the supporter out numbered them completely. The Cena shirts were probably worn by 60% of the attendees. I said before that the most popular shirt was Rocks I Bring It shirt, but I was refering to a singular shirt. There were only about 20 different kinds of Cena shirts out there.

MCWAY · « **Reply #14 on:** April 04, 2011, 11:45:57 AM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on April 04, 2011, 08:18:51 AM

I don't know where you were sitting but the entire building was popping for Cena.

Go look at the Rocks past mic work and compare to this. He stunk. The only funny thing he said was the line about May being a divasaurus.

Well, popping can be cheering or booing. When Rock first joined the Nation of Domination, the "ROCKY SUCKS!!" chants were thundering. He became the focus of the NOD.

I'm sorry you didn't enjoy this WrestleMania. Next year it's in Miami; and it may be outdoors like WrestleMania 24.

Playboy · « **Reply #15 on:** April 04, 2011, 12:16:03 PM »

Quote from: cheftim on April 04, 2011, 11:04:30 AM

It was a rip off. But I had a great day yesterday. The biggest rip off was Michaels not being in the streak match somehow. Looking forward to watching the HOF induction tonight.

I was disappointed too. I thought for sure HBK would have cost HHH the match or at least interfere in some capacity.

LurkerNoMore · « **Reply #16 on:** April 04, 2011, 05:14:28 PM »

I live right up the road from Miami, but won't be going if that card is as lame as this one.

mass 04 · « **Reply #17 on:** April 04, 2011, 06:36:26 PM »

Didn't like Rock's opening promo...Just him spouting his 10 year old catch phrases. Starting WM with a promo didn't feel right. Could have chopped half the promo and put the US title match on for guys who bust their ass 300 days a year instead of having a Rock pep rally. The whole main event had way to much going on. When the Rock delivers its, "Oh man he's awesome. What mic skills." but when something falls flat, people blame the writers..you can't have it both ways.

MCWAY · « **Reply #18 on:** April 04, 2011, 06:59:12 PM »

Quote from: LurkerNoMore on April 04, 2011, 05:14:28 PM

I live right up the road from Miami, but won't be going if that card is as lame as this one.

You live in/near Miami; yet you went to WrestleMania 27 in Georgia but MISSED WrestleMania 24 in Orlando three years ago a(which is 3-4 hours away)?

Playboy · « **Reply #19 on:** April 05, 2011, 04:47:47 AM »

Quote from: cheftim on April 04, 2011, 09:47:39 PM

Timmy is along for the fun ride. I would have been so happy to have gone to the big show last night. They probably wouldn't even let me in the door! I love this stuff. Wrestlemania! I'm gonna do my best to hit Miami next year. I have to do it at least once before I die. Taker 20. Rock/Cena. Who knows what else. Timmy watched it again. It is what it is. A fan sticks through it good times and bad. Federation for life.

Well....this came straight off the presses....

In a fantasy bout for the ages, John Cena will face Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson next year at WrestleMania XXVIII, emanating from The Great One’s hometown of Miami, Florida. Yes, we’ve got a one-year buildup!

The match-up WWE is advertising as “the match the world wants to see” was announced at the conclusion of RAW during a confrontation between The Rock and John Cena. The Rock accepted Cena’s challenge for a match, but said it would be at WrestleMania XXVIII.

The Rock extended his hand to Cena, which he shook. Following their handshake agreement, the two were jumped by The Corre. Cena and Rock fought the group off and two shook hands again to conclude RAW.

Montague · « **Reply #20 on:** April 05, 2011, 05:19:46 AM »

Dear WWE Universe:

To apologize for a shitty WrestleMania 27, we're promising and planning a much better WrestleMania 28.
You'll have to wait a year, but what the hell; right?

Sincerely,
WWE

Playboy · « **Reply #21 on:** April 05, 2011, 05:32:20 AM »

Quote from: Montague on April 05, 2011, 05:19:46 AM

Dear WWE Universe:

To apologize for a shitty WrestleMania 27, we're promising and planning a much better WrestleMania 28.
You'll have to wait a year, but what the hell; right?

Sincerely,
WWE

What kills me is that they barely got over WM this year and they already have the main event planned for next years WM. Rock vs Cena. Unreal.

Montague · « **Reply #22 on:** April 05, 2011, 05:36:23 AM »

Quote from: Playboy on April 05, 2011, 05:32:20 AM

What kills me is that they barely got over WM this year and they already have the main event planned for next years WM. Rock vs Cena. Unreal.

It doesn't matter what I think, but what the fans as a whole think.
The audience roared at Rock's confirmation of a match between the two...but, did you hear the boo's immediately following the words, "WrestleMania 28?"

That stipulation killed all the momentum of that promo, IMO.

Playboy · « **Reply #23 on:** April 05, 2011, 06:03:56 AM »

Quote from: Montague on April 05, 2011, 05:36:23 AM

It doesn't matter what I think, but what the fans as a whole think.
The audience roared at Rock's confirmation of a match between the two...but, did you hear the boo's immediately following the words, "WrestleMania 28?"

That stipulation killed all the momentum of that promo, IMO.

I heard. Not good. Not good at all.

MCWAY · « **Reply #24 on:** April 05, 2011, 06:53:00 AM »

Quote from: Playboy on April 05, 2011, 06:03:56 AM

I heard. Not good. Not good at all.

I disagree. Part of the reason that WrestleManias don't live up to the hype is that the main-event doesn't have enough beef behind it.

Some of the best 'Mania main events have deep roots and story lines.

WrestleMania 19: Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar had MONTHS of buildup, especially with their amateur wrestling backgrounds.

WrestleMania 5: The Mega-Powers EXPLODE. That main-event was all but set up after Savage won the title the previous year.

WrestleMania 25: 'Taker vs. Michaels...enough said.

WrestleMania 24: Edge vs. 'Taker. Had nearly a year buildup, based on Edge cashing in the MITB briefcase on a beat-up and bloodied Deadman.

It appears that WWE is starting to remember that the main event DOES NOT have to be a World title match (which makes the whole Royal Rumble storyline almost moot).

We waited a year for Savage-Hogan; we can wait a year for Cena-Rock.