I need help with a problem regarding 'Sea Monkeys'

[20inch calves]

I have to wear dress pants for work. I either conduct or attend meetings all week long. When I sit on a vinyl or leather covered chair for over a 1/2 an hour, when I get up I leave what I like to call a "Sea Monkey". A small line of ass and/or ballsack sweat on the seat of the chair. Yesterday I was sitting next to a pretty good looking woman and was working her a little but when we got up for a break she looked down and seen my sea monkey. That pretty much ruined any chance I had if any. I bath everyday and have even tried baby powder in the morning. The baby powder just turns into cake batter.
Anyone else have this problem and has a solution? I thought of stuffing a slice of Wonder Bread in my shorts to soak it up but that could get messy as well. Pic available on request. Thank you in advance.

why don't you wear a pair of thin shorts or underarmor under your pants. they make the kind that absorbs sweat

[Tito24]

[Dr Dutch]

Hey Dutch, could Honey Badger scare my Sea Monkeys away?

Absolutely, but it won't cause it doesn't give a shit. It just do what it please..

[gym**rat]

Absolutely, but it won't cause it doesn't give a shit. It just do what it please..

Dutch, do you think Honey Badger would give a shit if I duct taped him to my taint area to soak up the sea monkeys before they hit the chair?

[Dr Dutch]

Dutch, do you think Honey Badger would give a shit if I duct taped him to my taint area to soak up the sea monkeys before they hit the chair?

Ask gh15, he gives a shit every now and then..

[Dr Dutch]

I don't feel like reading the whole thread, but anyone recommended a diaper yet?

[gym**rat]

I don't feel like reading the whole thread, but anyone recommended a diaper yet?

Yes they did. Should I wear one under posing trunks? That would be a good look!

[240 is Back]

eat more fiber

[gym**rat]

eat more fiber

240, what will that do besides me shit more. God knows I do enough of that.

[Dr Dutch]

Yes they did. Should I wear one under posing trunks? That would be a good look!

Dunno. Do you were posing trunks at work then ?

[pedro01]

Great info. I just don't want to stick a battery powered device in my ass crack. My wife tried that one time and I slapped the piss out of her.

LMAO !!!

[gym**rat]

Dunno. Do you were posing trunks at work then ?

Doesn't everyone?   

[Dr Dutch]

Gym**rat is a funny guy.. 

[gym**rat]

Gym**rat is a funny guy.. 

Thanks man. It just seems my life is a constant joke. Shit happens to me that does not happen to anyone else and if I didn't experience it, I wouldn't believe it myself. That is why I don't get upset if someone calls bullshit.

[gym**rat]

New Sea Monkey Drama today. It is 93 degrees with a heat index of 108 here in Indy. I go to Chick Fil-a for lunch. When I am done eating I get up forgetting to slide out and sure enough I leave a nice size summer sea monkey. Before I can turn back around the lady that wipes off the tables walks up, looks down at the sea monkey, gives me a "shitty" look then uses her towel and wipes up the sea monkey off my seat. She then proceeds to wipe the tabletop off with the same towel. Can sea monkey-itis get transfered from one human to another that way?

[leadhead]

I sometimes get a 'sea monkey' also in the florida heat but my main problem use to be my underarms. i'd pit stain every morning and even worse when I was on a cycle. I used the drysol stuff and it didn't help much and my pits always tingled when I used it. Then I got the drionic machine and it cured the problem. My next step was botox and that stuff isn't cheap and not covered by insurance. The drionic machine might be nasty to use in your buttcrack but it'll probably alleviate your seas monkey problems

[gym**rat]

I sometimes get a 'sea monkey' also in the florida heat but my main problem use to be my underarms. i'd pit stain every morning and even worse when I was on a cycle. I used the drysol stuff and it didn't help much and my pits always tingled when I used it. Then I got the drionic machine and it cured the problem. My next step was botox and that stuff isn't cheap and not covered by insurance. The drionic machine might be nasty to use in your buttcrack but it'll probably alleviate your seas monkey problems

Botox huh?? I have always wanted to have botox done on one testicle. I would then pop it out for my wife and tell her I have testicular cancer so I could get a pity blow job.

Thanks for the info though.

[Jizzacked]

My major issue is back sweat.  I can't seem to keep my back dry no matter what.  anyone have any good suggestions for this problem?  I may have to start wearing a suit and tie again soon, so I am a little concerned.

[galain]

I sweat very easily too, my ass crack, and especially my hands and feet, and after years of trying pretty much everything I could try including anti perspirants and drionic treatments, I one day just thought "Well, fuck it. I sweat. It's not pretty, but if other people have an issue with it then it's their problem not mine".

I do do the sea monkey slide on hot days though!

[Dr Dutch]

Sea Monkey's a real badass..it just doesn't give a shit.

[Parker]

I sweat very easily too, my ass crack, and especially my hands and feet, and after years of trying pretty much everything I could try including anti perspirants and drionic treatments, I one day just thought "Well, fuck it. I sweat. It's not pretty, but if other people have an issue with it then it's their problem not mine".

I do do the sea monkey slide on hot days though!

You can get a operation for the hands and feet....

[gym**rat]

Sea Monkey's a real badass..it just doesn't give a shit.

That is the truth.

[Dr Dutch]

New Sea Monkey Drama today. It is 93 degrees with a heat index of 108 here in Indy. I go to Chick Fil-a for lunch. When I am done eating I get up forgetting to slide out and sure enough I leave a nice size summer sea monkey. Before I can turn back around the lady that wipes off the tables walks up, looks down at the sea monkey, gives me a "shitty" look then uses her towel and wipes up the sea monkey off my seat. She then proceeds to wipe the tabletop off with the same towel. Can sea monkey-itis get transfered from one human to another that way?

Did she smell at the towel as well ?

[gym**rat]

Did she smell at the towel as well ?

I believe she was a little too disgusted at me to do that. I was just hoping that the next person that sat at the table did not drop a waffle fry on the table then eat it. I think that would constitute an A-T-M.

[Dr Dutch]

Just imagine: a hot chick could be ATM'ing your Sea Monkey !!!