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Author Topic: What is the correct/polite response....  (Read 6628 times)
Butterbean
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« on: November 14, 2011, 03:58:40 PM »

When you are in a store or something and someone almost runs into you accidentally and they say, "Excuse me"  ?

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« Reply #1 on: November 14, 2011, 04:12:01 PM »

That so rarely happens.  Usually it's a sharp elbow in the ribs or a bash with a big handbag and a blank stare.



I say Squeeze Me Squeeze Me? or Scusa Scusa? if I'm trying to get through a crowd.  Both work any time, any place.



xL


More often than not though, it's a massive woman coming at me with a child in a pushchair and I just get outta their way.  

Do a sidestep.  Sometimes I politely say "You're welcome?" as they stomp past me.
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Migs
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« Reply #2 on: November 14, 2011, 05:38:45 PM »

spinning back fist, the say "you're excused"
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CalvinH
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« Reply #3 on: November 15, 2011, 07:20:06 AM »

When you are in a store or something and someone almost runs into you accidentally and they say, "Excuse me"  ?




You say "Are there things?"
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« Reply #4 on: November 15, 2011, 10:23:33 AM »

When you are in a store or something and someone almost runs into you accidentally and they say, "Excuse me"  ?




depends on their tone of voice
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Migs
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« Reply #5 on: November 15, 2011, 11:19:05 AM »

i saw you go postal on them and tell them that they suck as human beings
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« Reply #6 on: November 15, 2011, 12:03:23 PM »

Step on their feet with yours!
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Migs
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« Reply #7 on: November 15, 2011, 02:42:29 PM »

Step on their feet with yours!

she'll take out the entire isle
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YoungBlood
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« Reply #8 on: November 15, 2011, 04:30:28 PM »



I usually take the situation into perspective. Are there other paths around you, did they just butt right through because they're too lazy to take the other path?

I find far too often that people just move right through where you're standing because they want the path of least resistance and then it's easier to say "Sorry" or "Excuse Me" and have it be false/hollow. With that said, it's usually the case that people are just being impolite/rude and want to get to the destination ASAP. So I usually give them some witty quip to let them know I was insulted they did what they did..."You're sorry? No I'm sorry you didn't go around, you just found it easier to say I'm sorry and continue moving."
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« Reply #9 on: November 16, 2011, 08:19:35 AM »

Fnny responses!

I used to say "um hmm" or "that's OK" but that seemed kind of rude like acknowledging they did something wrong when they didn't.  One time after I said "excuse me" to a lady she said, "You're fine." meaning, you did nothing wrong, you're fine....so I say that.

But the other day a couple almost ran into me unintentionally and the man said, "Excuse us." and I said "You're fine."

I was about 15 or 20 feet past them and I hear the "lady" say in a bitchy voice, "You're fine!"   I turned around and she was looking away but he looked at me like he was embarrassed. 

I thought "you're fine" was a nice thing to say but apparently not  Cry
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« Reply #10 on: November 16, 2011, 06:06:28 PM »

Fnny responses!

I used to say "um hmm" or "that's OK" but that seemed kind of rude like acknowledging they did something wrong when they didn't.  One time after I said "excuse me" to a lady she said, "You're fine." meaning, you did nothing wrong, you're fine....so I say that.

But the other day a couple almost ran into me unintentionally and the man said, "Excuse us." and I said "You're fine."

I was about 15 or 20 feet past them and I hear the "lady" say in a bitchy voice, "You're fine!"   I turned around and she was looking away but he looked at me like he was embarrassed. 

I thought "you're fine" was a nice thing to say but apparently not  Cry

Everyone responds differently to different things too. What you said could have put her off for a variety of reasons. Maybe she was just having a bad day, was a tourist and where she's from it's not a proper response, or perhaps she was saying you have a fine butt? Grin

Sometimes when someone leaves and they offer a parting comment like "Hope you have a nice day" I will say "likewise." Certain situations, however, this comes off as awkward as well as insincere and a lot of people misinterpret me returning their good words as being shallow.
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Migs
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« Reply #11 on: November 17, 2011, 08:55:05 AM »

Fnny responses!

I used to say "um hmm" or "that's OK" but that seemed kind of rude like acknowledging they did something wrong when they didn't.  One time after I said "excuse me" to a lady she said, "You're fine." meaning, you did nothing wrong, you're fine....so I say that.

But the other day a couple almost ran into me unintentionally and the man said, "Excuse us." and I said "You're fine."

I was about 15 or 20 feet past them and I hear the "lady" say in a bitchy voice, "You're fine!"   I turned around and she was looking away but he looked at me like he was embarrassed. 

I thought "you're fine" was a nice thing to say but apparently not  Cry

Being a woman she probably misunderstood and thought that you were trying to come on to her man.  As in "you're fine, call me sometime" not like "you're fine, for being an absolute douch and running into me"
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« Reply #12 on: November 20, 2011, 01:01:54 PM »

Being a woman


Precisely.  It's completely and utterly totally different if you're a woman...

(Migs' first response to this being a good example).  If you are a man obviously you can sarcastically say "you're excused" and give them a knowledgeable wink when they cut you off in pedestrian traffic.

But as a defenseless woman, that's impossible.  All you can do is see them approaching, stand back and hold the door open for them as they flounce past, pounding the pavement and making you quiver and shake and making you hate humankind.

And crowds.  Gimme strength.  I detest crowds.  Dip and dive.

I learned this in NYC when I was very young:  Someone might punch my perfect teeth out if I smile at them the wrong way.  Smiling is a no-go.



Best polite response is to back off, get miles away.

xL


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xxxLinda
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« Reply #13 on: November 20, 2011, 03:03:04 PM »

I have though recently realised a new phenomenon:  People bashing through or even sometimes just standing their ground and being polite and saying "I'm sorry?"  with a slight rudish intonation like a query at the end?  I'm sorry??


Me being me, I always have an answer to every one-liner...  I've started saying 'but don't ever be sorry' (as in don't ever in future do anything to be sorry for, but they obviously don't get that sarcasm).  It works.

I say 'don't be sorry', sidestep and do the half smile, you know, the semi one with just the upwards lips without the full-on-teeth.



xxxL
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« Reply #14 on: November 20, 2011, 03:43:09 PM »

The other day at Safeway, a woman who was not paying attention to where she was going, ran over my foot with her shopping cart. Fortunately, it just knocked my sandal off my heal and didn't actually hurt me. She apologized and I told her that it was OK and that I was fine. But, in my head I was thinking "pay attention to what you are doing you dumb bitch!" Guess it's good that we don't always say what we think, huh?
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« Reply #15 on: November 20, 2011, 03:56:40 PM »

What i'd say to that one (after not kicking her) is "it's okay - we're so lucky i'm not wearing my cowboy boots..."  as in:  I could've really hurt you.


But on the other foot, please look where you're going, sometimes one (me mostly) might find themselves in a dream state whilst wheeling down the cheese aisle and one might not see the bloke coming the other way who knows exactly what he wants.




madly
xL

wear proper footwear when in the shops
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YoungBlood
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« Reply #16 on: November 20, 2011, 06:03:24 PM »

But, in my head I was thinking "pay attention to what you are doing you dumb bitch!" Guess it's good that we don't always say what we think, huh?

But what would be wrong with saying that and why? If she was obviously not paying attention to you, what else could have happened? Even if she was paying attention she deserves you to say that to her even more!

People don't take time to reflect upon themselves and make adjustments and make themselves better. It hurts too much and can be frustrating as hell. But this is how we make progress in the world. Not by always being polite so as to not hurt their feelings. She hits your ankle and say she bruises it and you're in pain...is it so wrong to turn around and say "You dumb fuck! What's a matter with you?!" If you don't she will probably walk away thinking it was wrong of her. But with you leaving that indelible imprint upon her mind, just maybe she'll do something to avoid being yelled at the time time and not hit your ankle.

It's not rocket science.
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Primemuscle
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« Reply #17 on: November 20, 2011, 11:24:42 PM »

What i'd say to that one (after not kicking her) is "it's okay - we're so lucky i'm not wearing my cowboy boots..."  as in:  I could've really hurt you.


But on the other foot, please look where you're going, sometimes one (me mostly) might find themselves in a dream state whilst wheeling down the cheese aisle and one might not see the bloke coming the other way who knows exactly what he wants.




madly
xL

wear proper footwear when in the shops

I hope you are not suggesting that there is anything wrong with wearing sandals. Where I live, in the Pacific Northwest, flip-flops are most common. Sandals are equivalent to wearing work boots. Besides, my sandals cover my feet better than most of shoes you most commonly see women wearing, which are usually nothing much more than a couple of thin straps over the top of their foot.
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« Reply #18 on: November 22, 2011, 03:24:26 PM »

Being a woman she probably misunderstood and thought that you were trying to come on to her man.  As in "you're fine, call me sometime"

Actually I think this may have been the case!

The other day at Safeway, a woman who was not paying attention to where she was going, ran over my foot with her shopping cart. Fortunately, it just knocked my sandal off my heal and didn't actually hurt me. She apologized and I told her that it was OK and that I was fine. But, in my head I was thinking "pay attention to what you are doing you dumb bitch!" Guess it's good that we don't always say what we think, huh?

I had a lady run over my foot w/her cart one time and she said "Watch where you're going!"


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« Reply #19 on: November 22, 2011, 04:26:36 PM »


People don't take time to reflect upon themselves and make adjustments and make themselves better.


People nowadays are plugged in via those earphones onto their smartphones and they have no concept or caring or knowledge whatsoever of their surroundings.

xL
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xxxLinda
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« Reply #20 on: November 22, 2011, 04:31:18 PM »

on one side of the path and another person was on the other side....they both saw me coming toward them...they were looking right at me....


they have paths for skating where you live?  Waaaaaaa that's correct and polite!
xL
keep left look right, depending upon which side you're on.
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Migs
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« Reply #21 on: November 23, 2011, 08:00:56 AM »

Stella "da man steala" big foot.

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Princess L
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« Reply #22 on: November 23, 2011, 04:50:53 PM »

Pulling up to a gas pump yesterday, a guy (older than me, so he must've been ancient) came pulling up the other direction (so we were nose to nose) made sure he was going faster than me to get to the pump first, forcing me to back up and find another pump.  I walked over to the area where he was fueling (to get some paper towels  Wink) and said "I bet no one ever accused you of being a gentleman.  Happy Thanksgiving" a$$hole(under my breath)
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« Reply #23 on: November 23, 2011, 05:37:32 PM »

For its forthcoming Leonardo da Vinci exhibition the National Gallery is limiting the number of tickets to 180 per timed half-hour slot. If that sounds like a lot, bear in mind that health and safety rules allow for a maximum 230 entrants every 30 minutes.

The museum's decision to pare down numbers and revenue is aimed at reducing what has become known as "gallery rage": the anger that wells up in visitors when they can't see the paintings for the gawping crowds, even after paying an extortionate price for a ticket. This was such a feature of Tate Modern's heavily subscribed Gauguin show that many disappointed punters swore they would never attend a big exhibition again.

So what can you, the ordinary punter, do to prevent the symptoms of gallery rage?

▶ Go at odd hours. Try first thing in the morning or last thing at night (blockbuster shows sometimes stay open until 9 or 10pm in order to accommodate everyone). Even if it's still crowded, it will be less fraught.

▶ Approach the exhibit non- sequentially. Visitors tend to bunch up at the first few works of art, driven by a sense that they have to see everything in order. Jump ahead to less crowded works, or even follow the whole route backwards. This should stop you suffering from gallery rage, although you may cause some.

▶ Skip the audio tour. The evil voices in your headphones will only tell you to go where everyone else on the audio tour is going. This invariably leads to traffic problems around paintings about which the audio guide has something to say.

▶ Re-contextualise the event. Pretend you've come to see a performance installation about crowd control and the limits of human endurance and that the art on the walls is, if anything, a needless distraction.

▶ Wear a high-visibility vest. It makes you look official; people will be afraid to jostle you.

▶ Cultivate a taste for the overlooked, the offputting, the little understood and the poorly reviewed. Your best hope of seeing a one-off collection of masterpieces in peace comes whenever some critic has the foresight to describe the show as "badly curated".

▶ Take advantage of adverse conditions. Even over-subscribed exhibitions become suddenly accessible during freak snowstorms, transport strikes and violent protests. Watch the news, pick your moment and bring extra water in case you get beaten up or kettled on the way home.

▶ Stay home and watch TV. Someone has to. Don't worry about being a philistine; just be thankful you live in a country where museum overcrowding is an actual problem.


* Crowds-around-the-Mona-Li-007.jpg (30.03 KB, 460x276 - viewed 363 times.)
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YoungBlood
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« Reply #24 on: November 23, 2011, 05:50:37 PM »

Pulling up to a gas pump yesterday, a guy (older than me, so he must've been ancient) came pulling up the other direction (so we were nose to nose) made sure he was going faster than me to get to the pump first, forcing me to back up and find another pump.  I walked over to the area where he was fueling (to get some paper towels  Wink) and said "I bet no one ever accused you of being a gentleman.  Happy Thanksgiving" a$$hole(under my breath)

It's times like this that I really become a smart ass. Quips from nowhere, snide remarks and nobody ever seems to step up to the challenge me back. They're always willing to open the door and play the game but never ever are they big enough (not in size or BBing fighting terms...in intellect and brazen enough) to finish the game that they themselves brought upon them at that moment.
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