lol....Chances are Johnny is so lonely, he searched high and low, long distance and local...ugly and uglier, fat and fatter. 1 child or 10.
In all this, every single female rejected poor Johnny and in a feeble attempt at humor, Johnny posts his conquests failures to have a laugh with the boys hoping, begging and pleading for some sort of acceptance to filll that dark, void, quietness.
Johnny just wants a hug and his mommy.