I helped Tania and Daniel and Olga, what ought I do next? I'm upset now

[xxxLinda]

An hour ago, just before the corner shop closed, I went to buy 3 more beers.

I noticed a very young woman with 2 children and all her luggage and bedding and toys standing on the doorstep on the way there.

On the way back two minutes later I asked her whether she was okay.  she obviously wasn't.  The children were crying and she had all of her belongings piled up outside.


I helped her telephone her new landlord.  The landlord had given her keys which don't work.  Tania had been ringing the upstairs flat doorbell for hours and they finally came down when I showed up.  We got her into her new flat with Olga and Daniel her babes in arms, screaming their heads off.  

It had started raining but we brought all her luggage indoors just before it got really wet.  The nice young strong African guy who lives upstairs there finally answered the front street door and helped us.


Tania has paid a massive deposit on a flat she doesn't have proper keys to and which we've sussed is rented out by a landlord who doesn't exist.  The children were crying and screaming.  I doubt they'd eaten.  Tania said they were just tired.  I live 5 houses up the road and have told her to telephone me tomorrow, to call then hang up and I'll call her back.


Or I'll take her a box of cornflakes and a pint of milk at 11am.  What a mess.  I asked her how much the rent was, I said 'this is like £350 a week?' whilst making sure she had gas and electric and showing her how to work them.  she said no, £375 per week.


merry everything and happy always
xL

[Andy Griffin]

An hour ago, just before the corner shop closed, I went to buy 3 more beers.

I noticed a very young woman with 2 children and all her luggage and bedding and toys standing on the doorstep on the way there.

On the way back two minutes later I asked her whether she was okay.  she obviously wasn't.  The children were crying and she had all of her belongings piled up outside.


I helped her telephone her new landlord.  The landlord had given her keys which don't work.  Tania had been ringing the upstairs flat doorbell for hours and they finally came down when I showed up.  We got her into her new flat with Olga and Daniel her babes in arms, screaming their heads off.  

It had started raining but we brought all her luggage indoors just before it got really wet.  The African guy who finally answered the front street door helped me.

Tasha has paid a massive deposit on a flat she doesn't have proper keys to and which we've sussed is rented out by a landlord who doesn't exist.  The children were crying and screaming.  I doubt they'd eaten.  Tania said they were just tired.  I live 5 houses up the road and have told her to telephone me tomorrow, to call then hang up and I'll call her back.


Or I'll take her a box of cornflakes and a pint of milk at 11am.  What a mess.  I asked her how much the rent was, I said 'this is £350 a week?' whilst making sure she had gas and electric and showing her how to work them.  she said no, £375 per week.


merry everything and happy always
xL

That sounds like a dreadful conundrum for her.  Surely there are provisions in the law to help her? 

[xxxLinda]

nope, it's christmas and noone will be working.  the poor woman has been ripped off very badly.


she'll be on the benefit as a single mum with 2 children.  Hopefully she'll get through this.  the taxpayer will pay her rent.  They won't try to evict her immediately and when they do it takes more than a year.




I wanted to help and did.  But I feel unable to further do so.  she doesn't have a key to the front street door, but the key they'd sold her did open the flat door.  she'll be unable to go out or get back in again and she was shaking like a leaf.


I told her I can help her with locks, she needs to change the lock on her flat door.  I have lots of locks.


I'm hugely upset about this, I just didn't need it.  she was unable to control or pacify her two howling offspring even though I kept saying there there baby it'll be okay.  It was awful.



I immediately went back to give her some huge ikea cotton curtains which will fit her window and a few big drawing pins.  she broke into tears again but I couldn't hug her, I was too upset.



madly
xL

[w8m8]

An hour ago, just before the corner shop closed, I went to buy 3 more beers.

I noticed a very young woman with 2 children and all her luggage and bedding and toys standing on the doorstep on the way there.

On the way back two minutes later I asked her whether she was okay.  she obviously wasn't.  The children were crying and she had all of her belongings piled up outside.


I helped her telephone her new landlord.  The landlord had given her keys which don't work.  Tania had been ringing the upstairs flat doorbell for hours and they finally came down when I showed up.  We got her into her new flat with Olga and Daniel her babes in arms, screaming their heads off.  

It had started raining but we brought all her luggage indoors just before it got really wet.  The nice young strong African guy who lives upstairs finally answered the front street door and helped me.


Tasha has paid a massive deposit on a flat she doesn't have proper keys to and which we've sussed is rented out by a landlord who doesn't exist.  The children were crying and screaming.  I doubt they'd eaten.  Tania said they were just tired.  I live 5 houses up the road and have told her to telephone me tomorrow, to call then hang up and I'll call her back.


Or I'll take her a box of cornflakes and a pint of milk at 11am.  What a mess.  I asked her how much the rent was, I said 'this is like £350 a week?' whilst making sure she had gas and electric and showing her how to work them.  she said no, £375 per week.


merry everything and happy always
xL

Did you give her a beer ?

[w8m8]

nope, it's christmas and noone will be working.  the poor woman has been ripped off very badly.


she'll be on the benefit as a single mum with 2 children.  Hopefully she'll get through this.  the taxpayer will pay her rent.  They won't try to evict her immediately and when they do it takes more than a year.




I wanted to help and did.  But I feel unable to further do so.  she doesn't have a key to the front street door, but the key they'd sold her did open the flat door.  she'll be unable to go out or get back in again and she was shaking like a leaf.


I told her I can help her with locks, she needs to change the lock on her flat door.  I have lots of locks.


I'm hugely upset about this, I just didn't need it.  she was unable to control or pacify her two howling offspring even though I kept saying there there baby it'll be okay.  It was awful.



I immediately went back to give her some huge ikea cotton curtains which will fit her window and a few big drawing pins.  she broke into tears again but I couldn't hug her, I was too upset.



madly
xL

why don't you ask a few neighbors and shopkeepers to help her ?

Tis the season for giving and doing for others 

[xxxLinda]

I thought of that (your beer idea) but didn't.  It wouldn't have helped.  Her English wasn't that good and she might have been Islamic (although I'd reckoned she was Eastern European.  I offered her to come to mine to have a cup of tea and use my telephone, but that wasn't possible as she had all of her belongings and two screaming children there outside.


I will take her a box of cornflakes and a pint of milk tomorrow at 11am unless you've a better idea?



merry etc

[newmom]

why don't you ask a few neighbors and shopkeepers to help her ?

Tis the season for giving and doing for others  

xxxLinda, that was a kind thing you did. I hope others do unto others also


yes it is. My heart breaks for a child that doesn't have one new toy to open but it's the food they do without most of all. Nugget and I adopted a family (secretly through her school for families in a few towns away). We asked what foods the family we adopted like. Of course spaghetti was top choice. We made them cards. Parents passed away recently and they live with grandparents on a fixed income. Got them a gift card to Applebees for all 4 of them. Nugget even went into our pantry for more food we didn't buy them at the store. One of the girls is younger so we also donated a few coats and lots of clothes and shoes for her. I hope they have a pleasant christmas.

[w8m8]

I thought of that but didn't as her English wasn't that good and she might have been Islamic (although I'd reckoned she was Eastern European.  I offered her to come to mine to have a cup of tea and use my telephone, but that wasn't possible as she had all of her belongings and two screaming children there outside.


I will take her a box of cornflakes and a pint of milk tomorrow at 11am unless you've a better idea?



merry etc

I know it's late there ... dunno what can be done at this hour .. I was wondering if they had any food before bed ?

They may have been hungry on top of frightened and cold and tired

[xxxLinda]

why don't you ask a few neighbors and shopkeepers to help her ?

Tis the season for giving and doing for others 

Uh huh.  We know few neighbours around here, but I shall very definitely introduce Tania to the Hindi lady at the corner shop I've known for 25 years.  I will ask her to give her credit if it's an emergency and I'll offer to pay her bill if needed.




Christ Almighty, 10 years ago when things were rich and abundant, we'd set a chair out for a guest at Christmas and make a joke of it.  

This new in-your-face extreme poverty is difficult to comprehend or deal with.




merry happy always everything etc.
xL

[w8m8]

xxxLinda, that was a kind thing you did. I hope others do unto others also


yes it is. My heart breaks for a child that doesn't have one new toy to open but it's the food they do without most of all. Nugget and I adopted a family (secretly through her school for families in a few towns away). We asked what foods the family we adopted like. Of course spaghetti was top choice. We made them cards. Parents passed away recently and they live with grandparents on a fixed income. Got them a gift card to Applebees for all 4 of them. Nugget even went into our pantry for more food we didn't buy them at the store. One of the girls is younger so we also donated a few coats and lots of clothes and shoes for her. I hope they have a pleasant christmas.

I remember one foster home I was in had a 4 yr old little boy also and I wondered what they would be able to do for him ... something just like you did happened for him Dee .. I dunno who gave the name though it was all left on the stoop

It seemed to be the best day of his life

He cried and took forever to open the gifts because he was amazed by each thing he got


That dinner was the best meal I had in that house aswell so I know it filled his little belly

[newmom]

I remember one foster home I was in had a 4 yr old little boy also and I wondered what they would be able to do for him ... something just like you did happened for him Dee .. I dunno who gave the name though it was all left on the stoop

It seemed to be the best day of his life

He cried and took forever to open the gifts because he was amazed by each thing he got


That dinner was the best meal I had in that house aswell so I know it filled his little belly

we didn't give our names. Has to be done secretly, which is fine, I just hope they enjoy it. I had to do something for their grandparents, I'm sure it isn't easy with young ones, dealing their own children dying. I did wrap a new present for each child, nugget made them friendship bracelets.

Oh that must of been wonderful to witness. Kids innocence at that age on Christmas is pure magic.  Sadly only a few years left, until some big mouth boy blabs Santa isn't real, which one rug rat did already but she didn't believe him. I'll be sad in some ways but glad she'll know who Santa Really is

[xxxLinda]

They may have been hungry on top of frightened and cold and tired

I got her into her flat, got the upstairs neighbour to come down and help.  I helped her move all her luggage.  

I gave her my phone number for tomorrow, told her to ring once then hang up and I'd call her back and then went back to take her nice curtains to pin up.  

I've said I'll take her a box of cornflakes tomorrow.  Yes, they're probably hungry.


But I made sure she knew how to work the heat, so they'll not be cold (until tomorrow when there will be no money left on the gas or electric.  There was £2.10 on the gas and less than that on the electric meter.



tis the season and so forth.  But this problem I cannot solve.  I'm too scared to offer proper help, I just cannot.

[Butterbean]

Thank you for helping them Linda.  And thanks to all who help others who need it.

[xxxLinda]

I realised the following day that she'd not in fact said thankyou.  I went back with lots of food - plus blankets and cushions.  She still didn't say thank you.



I shall in future have to carefully hand-pick my charities etc.  I'm not helping any other 16-year old Eastern European girls with two crying unfed cold children.  I've lost my sympathy.  

She'll be fine - she spent all day Friday queueing up for a crisis handout - she'll get lots of dosh next week from the Department of Social Security (our tax money at work).  

I wanted to ask her where the father of her two screaming babies was?  I wanted to ask her why she didn't ask that he wear a condom?  I wanted to ask her what she thinks she's doing?  

It was 9:55pm at night and she's showing up to her new flat crying there without proper keys?  
Having paid a massive (taxpayer subsidised) deposit for those dodgy keys?  

Yes - she was standing there sobbing in the rain and so were both her snotty screaming kids.
She might have been there for 3 or 4 hours prior to my help or might have been there all night if I hadn't.  

The upstairs neighbours were no way going to come down to answer - she'd been ringing their doorbell nonstop - so i stood back on the road and did a praying gesture at them and they came down.  They were looking out their window flipping out - they were probably hoping they'd just all go away.


But she'll be fine.  She'll get over it.  I asked her whether they were twins and she said oh no - she'd gotten preggers again immediately.

I've worked all my life  >this for teenagers who can't wear condoms who breed children they can't afford to feed in order to get free flats the taxpayer is paying £375 per week for?



If she bothers to say thank you I may get over this feeling I have about takers.  If not >more pity on her.



xxx


Reminder to self:  Never ever go out again at 9:55pm to the corner shop.  Just don't do it.