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Author Topic: Autopsy report  (Read 8336 times)

orion

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Autopsy report
« on: July 16, 2012, 06:47:51 AM »
Watching the news this weekend and an Australian surfer was killed by a great white.  An eyewitness on a seadoo said the 14 foot shark jumped out and bit the surfer in half. When he went over and tried to help the shark went after him, he watched helplessly as it took the body half underwater and swam away.
Got me thinking, you're on the slab in the morgue and the medical examiner is making out his report, what do you not want your cause of death to be?
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The_Punisher

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #1 on: July 16, 2012, 06:58:32 AM »
Quote from: orion on July 16, 2012, 06:47:51 AM
Watching the news this weekend and an Australian surfer was killed by a great white.  An eyewitness on a seadoo said the 14 foot shark jumped out and bit the surfer in half. When he went over and tried to help the shark went after him, he watched helplessly as it took the body half underwater and swam away.
Got me thinking, you're on the slab in the morgue and the medical examiner is making out his report, what do you not want your cause of death to be?


shit, according to that description, this was a fucking Horrific attack.....the surfer didn't look that big of a guy either, but the bad thing is, that monster shark have a taste for human now and it will come back very soon on that same spot to look for more surfers......that part in Autralia is now the leading coast for Great white attacks. there were at least 5 fatal attacks in 10 months......your best bet is stay the fuck out of these waters......
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Tito24

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #2 on: July 16, 2012, 07:04:24 AM »
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TrueGrit

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #3 on: July 16, 2012, 07:04:33 AM »
Basile is attending the funeral. Hopefully the Sheila will be comforted by the machine-building, Ironage man of muscle.



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Kwon_2

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #4 on: July 16, 2012, 07:09:45 AM »
Quote from: The_Punisher on July 16, 2012, 06:58:32 AM

shit, according to that description, this was a fucking Horrific attack.....the surfer didn't look that big of a guy either, but the bad thing is, that monster shark have a taste for human now and it will come back very soon on that same spot to look for more surfers......that part in Autralia is now the leading coast for Great white attacks. there were at least 5 fatal attacks in 10 months......your best bet is stay the fuck out of these waters......

That Great White Shark got what he deserved though, he got bit in half by an even BIGGER monster shark
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Dr Dutch

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #5 on: July 16, 2012, 07:11:13 AM »
I think this thread is not about sharks, but about the ways you do not want to die...
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Kwon_2

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #6 on: July 16, 2012, 07:13:09 AM »
Do you really think This Shark wanted to die in this way?
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BigCyp

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #7 on: July 16, 2012, 07:19:49 AM »
Good riddance if you ask me. Surfers don't even work jobs
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orion

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #8 on: July 16, 2012, 07:24:35 AM »
Quote from: dutchguy on July 16, 2012, 07:11:13 AM
I think this thread is not about sharks, but about the ways you do not want to die...

Your comprehensive skills are impressive.
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Bam-bam

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #9 on: July 16, 2012, 07:28:10 AM »
Quote from: Tito24 on July 16, 2012, 07:04:24 AM


the crazu fucker is even smiling to the camera lol
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Kwon_2

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #10 on: July 16, 2012, 07:29:27 AM »
Yes, the Shark is taunting us
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Dr Dutch

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #11 on: July 16, 2012, 07:30:26 AM »
Some only prey on Palestines....

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El Diablo Blanco

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #12 on: July 16, 2012, 07:33:01 AM »
Quote from: The_Punisher on July 16, 2012, 06:58:32 AM

shit, according to that description, this was a fucking Horrific attack.....the surfer didn't look that big of a guy either, but the bad thing is, that monster shark have a taste for human now and it will come back very soon on that same spot to look for more surfers......that part in Autralia is now the leading coast for Great white attacks. there were at least 5 fatal attacks in 10 months......your best bet is stay the fuck out of these waters......

HAHAHA.  dumbest statement of the year.  You think they are vampires?  That the shark is thinking, shit man, what have I been missing all my life.  I need me some more human, screw the tuna.
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orion

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #13 on: July 16, 2012, 07:37:03 AM »
Quote from: El Diablo Blanco on July 16, 2012, 07:33:01 AM
HAHAHA.  dumbest statement of the year.  You think they are vampires?  That the shark is thinking, shit man, what have I been missing all my life.  I need me some more human, screw the tuna.

Well, a lot of zombies would disagree with you.
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SF1900

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #14 on: July 16, 2012, 07:39:03 AM »
This is clearly how sharks attack sea lions and other prey when they want to eat. A lot of times sharks will take test bites, small "nibbles" to see if what they are nibbling is on is what they like. A lot of shark attacks on humans are just these. However, this attack was to eat. Plain and simple. Must have been a hungry shark
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SF1900

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #15 on: July 16, 2012, 07:44:33 AM »
I mean, I feel bad but I dont. The oceans were not meant for people to play in, to take their boogie boards and surf boards and splash around and disturb the animals that live in there. You wouldn't like it if someone invaded your home. This is just another instance of humans encroaching on nature and taking something beautiful and turning it into their own plaything.

FILT!
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240 is Back

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #16 on: July 16, 2012, 07:45:50 AM »
For how much money would you have sex with the gills of a sleeping shark?
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orion

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #17 on: July 16, 2012, 07:46:25 AM »
Quote from: SF1900 on July 16, 2012, 07:39:03 AM
This is clearly how sharks attack sea lions and other prey when they want to eat. A lot of times sharks will take test bites, small "nibbles" to see if what they are nibbling is on is what they like. A lot of shark attacks on humans are just these. However, this attack was to eat. Plain and simple. Must have been a hungry shark

Didn't want to miss his anabolic window.
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SF1900

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #18 on: July 16, 2012, 07:49:31 AM »
Quote from: orion on July 16, 2012, 07:46:25 AM
Didn't want to miss his anabolic window.

 ;D ;D

30 minute window of opportunity. Once it hits 31 minutes, your workout does not count!
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gym**rat

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #19 on: July 16, 2012, 07:50:26 AM »
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Army of One

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #20 on: July 16, 2012, 08:16:46 AM »
Some kayaker got chased by a great white a few days ago in Cape Cod, the attack in Western Australia is the 5th in 10 months in Aus, normally average 1 a year

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Dr Dutch

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #21 on: July 16, 2012, 08:26:53 AM »
Eat this for your autopsy report.... >:(

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gym**rat

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #22 on: July 16, 2012, 08:27:50 AM »
Quote from: Army of One on July 16, 2012, 08:16:46 AM
Some kayaker got chased by a great white a few days ago in Cape Cod, the attack in Western Australia is the 5th in 10 months in Aus, normally average 1 a year



There would have been a big brown trail behind my kayak.
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Dr Dutch

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #23 on: July 16, 2012, 08:30:20 AM »
Musclecenter ain't afraid of no shark...

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Dr Dutch

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Re: Autopsy report
« Reply #24 on: July 16, 2012, 08:31:06 AM »
Quote from: gym**rat on July 16, 2012, 08:27:50 AM
There would have been a big brown trail behind my kayak.
You would be safe...shark would think your a whale-turd.
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