Will I bang her one more time? Maybe twice more? Just makes it harder to stay broken up though...
1. ghastly laminate wood flooring to repel excess moisture that collects when the sewer backs up into the bathroom
2. obvious dungeon basement apartment devoid of natural light leading to rickets and bowed legs
3. exposed pipes running along the ceiling cleverly painted in white in a thinly veiled attempt to conceal the poverty-stricken lodging
4. epic sunglasses hanging from said pipes in a crummy attempt to "funk the place up"
5. awkward "Felix the Cat" painting hanging over the Ikea couch in a campy attempt at nouveau art
6. cheap Droid phone from 3 years ago bought from a street corner with a stolen credit card
7. unused guitar sitting lonely in the corner with owner desperately hoping some gentlemen will come over and serenade with anything besides a drunken booty call
8. strange golden chicken on the top shelf. I don't even know how to build on this.
9. dusty glasses in need of Windex on wall-mounted shelving from Wal-Mart go unused as owner drinks straight from bottle
10. biblically horrible plaster spackled wall treatment because drywall was too expensive
11. uncouth color coordination as evidenced by a hot red circa 80's throw-pillow couch paired with baby blue Snuggi and neck pillow
Would not hit.