Author Topic: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*  (Read 5005 times)

calfzilla

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #25 on: January 22, 2013, 07:59:35 PM »
Why doesn't the security company hire another officer so they don't have to pay so much overtime with the double shifts? 

Obvious Gimmick

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #26 on: January 22, 2013, 08:01:23 PM »
In this  line of work I've seen (and eaten) it all, from two week old pizza to rancid tuna sandwiches. I've got a cast iron stomach. And if by some fluke I did get the runs I simply use a homemade adult diaper: grab a maxi pad from the Ladies Room, and after taking a messy dump, wedge the maxi pad up between the butt cheeks to keep the keister region dry and comfy for the duration of the security shift.

The mc guyver of the security biz. How lOng until to give Milton the heave-ho and start getting your own contracts?

Fuzzy Nuts

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #27 on: January 22, 2013, 08:02:29 PM »
In this  line of work I've seen (and eaten) it all, from two week old pizza to rancid tuna sandwiches. I've got a cast iron stomach. And if by some fluke I did get the runs I simply use a homemade adult diaper: grab a maxi pad from the Ladies Room, and after taking a messy dump, wedge the maxi pad up between the butt cheeks to keep the keister region dry and comfy for the duration of the security shift.
Security work was starting to sound kind of glamorous, until this post.

gmflex

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #28 on: January 22, 2013, 08:09:13 PM »
In this  line of work I've seen (and eaten) it all, from two week old pizza to rancid tuna sandwiches. I've got a cast iron stomach. And if by some fluke I did get the runs I simply use a homemade adult diaper: grab a maxi pad from the Ladies Room, and after taking a messy dump, wedge the maxi pad up between the butt cheeks to keep the keister region dry and comfy for the duration of the security shift.


 ;D ;D
lmao

SF1900

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #29 on: January 22, 2013, 09:03:29 PM »
True Amateur, how is the night shift going?
X

calfzilla

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #30 on: January 22, 2013, 09:18:43 PM »
TA can tell us any stories how you caught any African Americans committing a criminal act and you had to rough them up?

C-BuZz

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #31 on: January 22, 2013, 09:20:42 PM »
Can hardly wait for another update from TA.


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arce1988

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #32 on: January 22, 2013, 09:35:57 PM »
 ;D

Dr.J

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #33 on: January 22, 2013, 11:42:34 PM »
Alright guys, I've been handling a disturbance on The Free Chatline phone line, as I am the guest moderator tonight. Things seem relatively quiet on Getbig.com, I'm about to heat up some Chinese Food I found in the lunch room refrigerator, so I'll be back shortly.
[/quote
Sweeeeeetttttttt........ .found food of peace!!
Mr. AZ 2003

booty

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #34 on: January 22, 2013, 11:50:56 PM »
In this  line of work I've seen (and eaten) it all, from two week old pizza to rancid tuna sandwiches. I've got a cast iron stomach. And if by some fluke I did get the runs I simply use a homemade adult diaper: grab a maxi pad from the Ladies Room, and after taking a messy dump, wedge the maxi pad up between the butt cheeks to keep the keister region dry and comfy for the duration of the security shift.
This is like a south park episode.  Do you keep brown paper bags close by too?  They are handy if you suddenly get ill and need to vomit. 

C-BuZz

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #35 on: January 23, 2013, 12:04:18 AM »
TA taking care of business.


Dr.J

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #36 on: January 23, 2013, 02:05:50 AM »
TA....you sleeping on the job?!
Mr. AZ 2003

booty

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #37 on: January 23, 2013, 04:50:53 AM »
Okay guys, I'm wrapping up the double Security shift. The workers are going to start arriving in the building soon, and I have to go out front and raise The American Flag.
Why are you raising the american flag??  Is it a special celebration or something? 

dj181

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #38 on: January 23, 2013, 05:06:35 AM »
TA can tell us any stories how you caught any African Americans committing a criminal act and you had to rough them up?

 ;D

CalvinH

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #39 on: January 23, 2013, 06:07:50 AM »
The American Flag gets raised every day and lowered every night at this building. Sometimes I hum The National Anthem as I'm raising it.


 8)

Chacka

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #40 on: January 23, 2013, 06:30:03 AM »
funny shit right here  :)

Chacka

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #41 on: January 23, 2013, 06:33:20 AM »
... and you seem to have dramatically reduced the # of posts by that flacid queef "Howard" past few weeks good job!

HockeyFightFan

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #42 on: January 23, 2013, 10:31:42 AM »
After membership on over fifty chat forums, many of which I proudly served as moderator, I would like to think I know a thing or two about handling these troublemakers. Cranks like Arse and Howard are a dime a dozen, and can be easily handled with advanced "mental judo" techniques.

True Amateur, what do you think of this?

http://www.getbig.com/boards/index.php?topic=353684.msg4985914#msg4985914

Getbig's own "juruth" also happens to frequent telephone chatlines. You guys probably have something in common.

HockeyFightFan

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #43 on: January 23, 2013, 12:35:22 PM »
True Amateur, what do you think of this?

http://www.getbig.com/boards/index.php?topic=353684.msg4985914#msg4985914

Getbig's own "juruth" also happens to frequent telephone chatlines. You guys probably have something in common.

Bump  ;D

gmflex

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #44 on: January 23, 2013, 05:31:11 PM »
 ;D

arce1988

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Re: Reporting for Security duty at 4pm *UPDATED*
« Reply #45 on: January 23, 2013, 07:54:47 PM »
 ;D