http://onewithnow.com/end-closure/All Things Must End: The Gift of Closure
by MANAL GHOSAIN on DECEMBER 15th, 2011
Life as we know it is the summation of beginnings and endings. It is the transformation of energy and matter—the dance of evolution.
If we look at our own existence, we realize that it is built and continues to grow on a foundation of relationships. The physical body is the visible manifestation of energy and matter uniting to produce the unique being that is you.
Our experiences and memories are a reflection of our relationship with nature, objects, other people and ourselves.
As we all know too well, a relationship that beings will end one day—sooner or later. This is part of the magic and mystery of life.
In most cases the ending is painful and unwelcomed. The holiday season is a wonderful opportunity to reflect on the relationships that have ended and the possibilities of what is yet to come.
While the writing below is mostly focused on our relationship with others, it can apply to our relationship with ourselves and with our environment.
Acceptance
I can’t remember a time when I was completely prepared for a relationship to end. The end comes in different shapes and forms but one result—it is over.
It is usually hard to fully grasp what happened. Life as we know it has changed and we need to allow ourselves time to adapt to the new reality.
The only thing that we can do is to allow the grieving process to take its course and for us to accept that life is never going to be the same.
Closure
When you accept, you put yourself in the driver seat and steer your life towards closure.
You choose to close this chapter. What was is over—regardless of why and how. You are no longer bound to the regrets of the past or the “what ifs” of the future.
And the best part about closure is that it’s always up to you. No one can take it away from you. When you decide to let go and move on, no one can stop you—other than you.
Closure is a gift. You let go of what was, and you open up to what could be. It is the door to new beginnings.
New beginnings
As hard as it may seem to let go and move on, take solace in knowing that it is an opportunity for something new to emerge.
Saying goodbye to what was creates a space for what could be. With every birth there is a death and after every death there is an opportunity for new life.
When we let go, we feel the space that this relationship has left behind. It is in that space that other beginnings are born. They may not necessarily be the same type of relationship. But they will be something that augments our journey and moves us forward. The universe always trades up.
This year I lost a childhood friend who died in a car accident. I also lost a connection to a family member who decided to drop all communication. There were no planned goodbyes and that’s okay. Time allowed me to find closure and accept where I am.
This pain is a reminder of our humanity and the inevitable ending that’s intertwined with a new beginning. This is the rhythm of the dance of life.
Beginnings and endings are nothing but an expressive transformation of energy that is within us and all around us.
Today I invite you to find closure and let go of what’s holding you in the past. Honor the memory of what was. Give yourself the gift of closure and open up to new possibilities.
As Dr. Seuss put it:
“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”
