Guys who white knight women

[johnnynoname]

If only certain people of today 15 minutes were up like hers...

I will say that I loved her in "Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion" (I swear I can calculate a Slugging Percentage)

plus she did that Criminal Minds spin off with Idi Amin

[Wiggs]

settle down, Delicious Lips McGhee

Has our relationship been reduced to me making a mockery in you some way and you responding  with a "settle down" followed by some witty comment?

[johnnynoname]

"settle down" is now MY meme

SF isn't here anymore so I take ownership of it.....it's kinda like how Del Wilkes stopped being "The Patriot" and now Tom Brandi does that gimmick on the indies


I'm the Tom Brandi of the "Settle Down" meme

[doison]

"settle down" is now MY meme

SF isn't here anymore so I take ownership of it.....it's kinda like how Del Wilkes stopped being "The Patriot" and now Tom Brandi does that gimmick on the indies


I'm the Tom Brandi of the "Settle Down" meme

Kinda a big announcement for such a little man, no?

[johnnynoname]

Kinda a big announcement for such a little man, no?

I'll show you a little man

[johnnynoname]

...see I pulled out my dick and wiggled it at the screen after I typed :

I'll show you a little man

[johnnynoname]

I cry into a pillow everynight

[Army of One]

I cry into a pillow everynight

Have you ever thought of your producer while masturbating since the "event"?

[johnnynoname]

Have you ever thought of your producer while masturbating since the "event"?

not at all......plus I barely remember what he looks like however I do remember that he wasn't bad looking...it sounds weird but it is the only way I can explain it

[Shockwave]

not at all......plus I barely remember what he looks like however I do remember that he wasn't bad looking...it sounds weird but it is the only way I can explain it

Translation - my mind is doing whatever mental gymnastics it can to make me not want to blow my brains into the wall.

Its ok bro, I'm an addict as well. We all do it. Well, except for the whole gay sex for money thing. Unless you're tbombz. Gay sex for free though, thats something else.

[The Ugly]

I cry into a pillow everynight

Dude, you're funny as fuck, but you seem to be way outta control. Stand-up, maybe that could be your thing?

[Rascal full]

I have told this story once before here, a girl named honey.

this was in 2010, tall girl, nice perky tits, nice ass, very ambitious, wanted to "take over the world" but she was 29. she was not taking anything but cum.
I was texting her and it was all flirty and sex related, she was into it.

She was just seeing some guy who was white knighting her, fine restaraunts and and shopping on weekends.
I was staying in the city (in Sydney, Shangra-la) I told her too meet me there on a certain Saturday night.

she said "sure, I have a green day concert on that evening but I can meet you immediately after"
anyway to cut a long story short, the white knight that took her to the concert delivered her to the hotel lobby, she told him her friends were staying there, he dropped her off and drove back home, about a 3 hour drive.

she came in, I was in a robe and drunk, she had a shower, we did what getbiggers do and I blew my load on her face (I told her I wouldn't) she was disgusted by the act, she washed it off, I said I wanted to go again, we did, I blew on her ass, shes even more in shock and horror, she showers my jizz off, and then goes to the mini bar for a refreshment I quickly snap back "hey fuck that, $7 for a coke"
 then she asked if she could have a chocolate cause she was hungry I said "nah" while I was laying on the bed watching a hillsong documentary, she just at the couch opposite the bed looking hungry and confused.

I asked her to leave as I made the excuse that friends were on there way, she said if she can spend the night and if it was possible for a lift home, she lived about 2.5-hours drive, I said "No way" I told her to catch the train, mind you it was 3am, no trains run at that time, that poor bitch waited at Circular quay station for 3 hours and probably another 3 hour commute on the train just to go home..and she was hungry.

Your lack of emotional attachement is what allowed you to act this way. Her lack of emotional attachement to the guy she was seeing led her to come to your hotel room. Pretty depressing story but interesting nonetheless.

[Palpatine Q]

exactly

after all, a true getbigger can take 14.00 and invest it in penny stocks (since getbiggers don't have to pay sales commissions), which lead to easy millions within weeks

and "honey" wants to spend your hard-earned millions on a fucking soda and Mars bar (both of which are highly catabolic)

you're a better man that most; you only sent her home rather than putting her head through the wall, then getting one last blowjob from your self-made glory hole

I'm sensing Chadwick thinks QB is completely full of shit. I'd like to get in on that as well

[Quickerblade]

I'm sensing Chadwick thinks QB is completely full of shit. I'd like to get in on that as well

Its a true story groink, I have had many failures too. This was a great thread to post it.
I don't benefit from anyone to make up a story.

[Chadwick The Beta]

I'm sensing Chadwick thinks QB is completely full of shit. I'd like to get in on that as well

Actually, I believe him. 

[johnnynoname]

Dude, you're funny as fuck, but you seem to be way outta control. Stand-up, maybe that could be your thing?

You know- my mom said that to me after I told her a joke that made her laugh uncontrollably

"But mom- I'm too handsome to do stand up. Comics aren't supposed to be good looking" I responded seriously



I never seen that woman laugh that hard in her life after I said that

[forillagorilla]

I'm an Alpha male

And girls want to **** alpha males. Let it piss you off as much as you want, but you know it's completely true. That girl you like who is kinda cute in a weird way, but is totally sweet and you have the biggest crush on? The one who keeps going back to guys who treat her wrong for reasnos you don't understand? The one who calls you up at 1 am to cry about how her boyfriend hasn't called her in 3 days, and no matter how long you listen to her, she'll never think of you as anything other than asexual? The one who will curl up next to you on the couch, hug you close, kiss you on the cheek, and never let you ****ing touch her beyond that?

Yeah, I'm ****
The hot girl who won't even look at you when you nod at them and smile? The one who laughs when you trip in the hallway and drop your stuff? The one who comes up and coyly aks for your help with her homework, and then pretends you don't exist once you finish?

Yeah, I'm ****ing her too, even harder.

The geeky girl you think might be enough like you that you have a chance with her? She plays warcraft on your server, and watches anime, and reads comics? She's so incredible and you just love her so much but you still haven't worked up the courage to tell her how you feel about her?

Guess who just sucked me off and told me they'll always love me?

And what's more? I laugh at guys like you. When you cry about how much girls treat you bad, and wonder why they can't just see that you're a nice guy who would always treat them right? I nod and tell you to hang in there, you'll find someone right for you someday, don't give up hope man. But inside? I'm laughing my ass off at you you pathetic ****. Every girl you set your sights on, who isn't a disgusting pig-monster, I'm going to **** 6 ways from sunday before you even tell her you think she's cute. I won't bother trying when you finally settle for that 350 pound girl who works at hardees, you can have that. Anything else I'm going to cum on her face before you get those lips near it.

And the biggest reason I laugh? It's not me doing all this. It's the girls. When you cry about how lonely you are? Or talk about how you just want to curl up and dissapear, and all that emo bull****? You're triggering her "Don't ****" instinct something feirce. You're a miserable weak coward, why would she want your genes? Feel free to buy her a new computer and help her decorate her apartment, you're great for that. But her baby-maker is barking orders at her, telling her to wrap her legs around me and hold on for as long as she can. She needs it, on a primal level you'll never get to see first hand, even if you do get a chance to **** her. Sooner or later one of them will lay back and spread their legs, but you won't see any hunger in their eyes. They won't beg you to love them forever and make them yours. You won't know what it's like to see her animal side needing you as much as she needs to eat and breath.

And she's cheating on you, I promise that. When she sits around quiet and uncomfortable, acting irritable and irrational towards you, wanting you to just back away and leave her alone, it's not her period. It's because I haven't called her for a day or two and her instincts are telling her to go find me. The primitive section of her brain doesn't want to risk smelling like another man when she gives herself to me, she wants me to know she's completely mine. We do things together she tells you she never would. Her pooper? Mine. I want to give her a facial? of course. I want her to suck the cum out of my dick, even though I just finished pumping away at her ass? she's never going to tell me no. She doesn't WNAT to tell me no. She wants me to know she'll do anything it takes to keep me. She'll rim my ass while she's down there sucking me off if it means pleasing me. She'll drink my cum from a shotglass. She'll wear a buttplug when we go out to dinner. She'll sleep handcuffed to my headboard. Anything.

And then she'll go home to you and tell you she's not in the mood today.

I'd say you should become an hero, but you being aruond makes her want a real man all the more, so keep ***ging it up emo bitches, I'll keep that pussy warm while you're crying in the corner.

No you aren't an Alpha Male and no you don't get tons of pussy...  Its gay as hell to type that on the net but I know it is your pretend life that you live out on here. Man - I bet if coach would have just put you in the game y'all would have won the championship and you would have played college ball too - lol... I am sorry for pissing on your little fantasy but don't be such a douche

[thebrink]

No you aren't an Alpha Male and no you don't get tons of pussy...  Its gay as hell to type that on the net but I know it is your pretend life that you live out on here. Man - I bet if coach would have just put you in the game y'all would have won the championship and you would have played college ball too - lol... I am sorry for pissing on your little fantasy but don't be such a douche

Agreed. Needs to get choked out and have shit done to him when he's out.

[Army of One]

No you aren't an Alpha Male and no you don't get tons of pussy...  Its gay as hell to type that on the net but I know it is your pretend life that you live out on here. Man - I bet if coach would have just put you in the game y'all would have won the championship and you would have played college ball too - lol... I am sorry for pissing on your little fantasy but don't be such a douche

Is this your first time on the internet?

[temple_of_dis]

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[The Ugly]

You know- my mom said that to me after I told her a joke that made her laugh uncontrollably

"But mom- I'm too handsome to do stand up. Comics aren't supposed to be good looking" I responded seriously



I never seen that woman laugh that hard in her life after I said that

Everytime you post one of your follow up rants about Getbiggers not appreciating the humor of a post, it cracks me up. I usually just don't say anything. You are clearly one of the funniest guys here, keep it up. Total homo, by the way.

[Maddy]

I cry into a pillow everynight

a dick
shaped pillow

[The True Adonis]

a dick
shaped pillow

Yes!
Please!
Order it for me
Pronto!

[Army of One]

Not sure who I like him better as, Borat or Ali G, both are classic.