why do I feel aroused when I stroke my beard then?
This is why -
BEARD FACTS
1. Stroking of beard increases concentration and cognitive ability.
2. Filters the air of toxic pollution and stray food.
3. Natural bear repellent when camping or wandering in the forest.
4. Science has shown that beards rarely sleep.
5. Acts as a homing beacon attracting the jealousy and admiration of the beardless.
6. Beards are almost completely immune to sarcasm.
7. Dramatically increases your wood chopping capabilities.
8. Helps you to instinctively know where the nearest mountain is.
9. Increases handsomeness.
10. Fits on your face.