Author Topic: Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns  (Read 1296 times)

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Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns
« on: February 23, 2014, 07:00:28 AM »
Taken from a website about trips to Amsterdam, this guy seems pretty cool and would make a good getbigger as he claims to be fat and unfit


This is my first report here... Please go easy on me... Apologies if it's too long or out of context to some of the others here. This covers a quick trip I took on 6-8th Jan, spending one night in Amsterdam.

I was traveling to a random small town in Germany which after doing some research I discovered the only way I was going to get any action whilst away was by pulling a local student (Highly unlikely being a fat, balding middle aged piss artist) or by raping one of the many local dairy cows that frequent the area. Not really fancying my chances at option one on a Monday/Tuesday night and having been through too many dairy cow lookalikes down the years for my liking I decided to fly into Amsterdam instead for an evenings entertainment before catching the train across the following morning.

By the time I reached my hotel on Warmoesstraat it was probably 17.30 and things were eerily quiet. After checking in, having a quick shit, shave and shower I decided to nip out and have a wander around the RLD to see what was about. I'd posted a topic a week or so before on here due to the shortness of my stay asking for any tips on punts to make the most out of my limited time. Typically GK wasn't working nor my personal favourite Lily, so this was going to be a case of pot luck.

After taking the grand tour for 30 minutes or so I headed and did a lap of the Oudekerk. Things weren't looking great, not many kamers open and those that were weren't overly appealing. I thought I'd have a look around the covered area down by la Vie En Proost to check if this cute Russian I'd seen before was still around. However, whilst walking down Bethlemsteeg I caught a glimpse of this dark haired girl and memory banked it for the way back. The covered area was busy with mongerers but only 2 or 3 girls working and nothing that particularly interested me. So back I went to check out the dark haired piece...

Anyway, upon stopping at her door I realised that she was an absolute stunner, about 5'8", early 20's, toned, tanned (Real, not orange like I get at home) with long dark hair pinned back in a pony tail. She wasn't overly made up, just looking natural and bloody good. I think her door was 3rd from the end, looking at the map I think it was number 6, may have been 5.

After agreeing on a 50 Euro session I went in and she stripped off. Good god. What a body. We chatted for a short while whilst I ripped my clothes off, she's a Romanian (I always seem to pick Romanians, fantastic place, really must visit) called Victoria. She was really nice, calming, we chatted about where we were both from and she started off with a CBJ. Now, I don't know why but lately I've really had a thing about tattooed women, don't ask me why, I don't have a clue. Mid life crisis or something. This was even one of my requests when I posted earlier asking for advice... Anyway, much to my and my now throbbing tools delight upon going down on me I couldn't help but notice a massive tattoo on her back, nothing garish but a pretty elegant plain piece.

After about 5 minutes of CBJ she asked if I was ready for the act, knowing that I was likely to blow my load the moment I bent her over I asked if she could carry on for a bit longer to which she surprisingly replied fine, no rush, it's not busy just enjoy and then plunged her head down once more.

A couple of minutes past during which time I recited the England world cup squads from 1966 to date in my head in an attempt to stave off the inevitable. She then decided she'd had enough of that, took her top and bra off and proceeded to ride me cowgirl. I couldn't take my eyes off of her, I'd been waiting for a sight like this for a long time. Again to my surprise she beckoned me towards her superb tits, saying that she wants me to touch them and to touch her. I didn't need a second invitation. Anyway, after a few minutes of me sucking through my arse she got off and bent over in front of me. I knew what was coming, after probably a minute, maybe two of looking at that perfect arse and tattoo I shot with furious gusto, the best orgasm I'd had in a long time.

Once finished we chatted again, she cleaned me up, very attentively, had a joke about a few things and chatted about Amsterdam and why I was there and so on. Still no rush, we had a quick peck before leaving probably after a good 30 minutes plus all in all.

Away I wandered, nuts drained, big grin on my face and thought it's time for a couple of beers and to get stoned. I nipped into Hunters, had a coke and a bag of weed they called Diesel plus a pre-rolled as time was of the essence. The pre-rolled got sparked up at the bar, now, I rarely smoke the stuff now, I do enjoy it but nowadays tend to keep it for when I'm visiting the Dam. I was well and truly caned by the time I left, which seemed like a couple of hours. To cut a long story short I spent the next couple of hours having a few beers, getting lost, getting soaking wet as it was pissing down plus suffering from the ravenous munchies. A nice fillet steak at one of the Argentinian steak houses was washed down with a couple of slices of pizza, a Mars bar, Twix and for some obsurd reason a packed of salted cashew nuts?...

As I was soaked I nipped back to the hotel to get changed before starting my next lap of the RLD. I was staying in Hotel CC for the first time and I have to say it's a great little hotel, perfectly located with the only problem being they don't do breakfast but hey-ho, hardly stuck for cafes around here.

I probably spent a good hour wandering around, but there was very little that took my fancy and I never like visiting the same girl again in one night, I like a bit of diversity. There was one absolute stunner in (I think) 5/6 Trompettersteeg which I fancied the look of however there was a group of about 10 American tourists, mainly women, stood outside laughing about how degrading it was etc so decided to head back in a minute once they had fucked off to McDonalds or whatever it was they were looking for. Bollocks, curtain shut by the time I got back so decided to go for another beer and head back in a bit. Still shut. This pattern repeated itself a bit until I eventually wrote that one off took another stroll.

I ended up in Monnikenstraat and a blonde with half of her head shaved took my fancy from a distance. The door I believe was 59-4. Looked tall, good body and reminded me of the singer Emma Hewitt who is on my celebrity bone list. Because of it's unfortunate location I followed the road around to Bloedstraat, bloody hell, it seemed to be butch night. As stoned as I was, a TS bigger and broader than me waving a cock around that would fill even the loosest of council estate bikes wasn't going to get my hard earned. As bad as my hemorrhoids were feeling, that wasn't going to itch the fuckers. I ended up doing a few laps as the blonde decided to disappear, not closed for business just decided to fuck off somewhere, probably needed a shit or something, you know what the kebabs are like around there... This just convinced the Shemale I was going to invest as I kept walking past, thankfully some big fat guy went in, I had to have a chuckle to myself, he looked like a professor..

Finally, arse wiped, fem fresh applied she was back. I negotiated at the door, 50 euro suck and sex. Bargain. She said her name was Jessica and that she was Dutch. Nice figure, the face not as great close up and the hair was actually a bit of a mess rather than styled like I thought from a distance. But tattoos again, result.

Things started well, giving me a very good CBJ. Then came the line. "Do you want the full service for another 50 euro?" Full service? Excuse me? Whats's that then? Do I get to slide one up your cheeks? No... It seems despite my deliberate negotiation at the door, what we had apparently agreed on was not "50 euro suck and sex" but in fact "50 euro suck Hand sex". Great. Here we go, no point in arguing, she's full of shit. Ruined the mood completely. At least by having this effect the bitch had to work harder to get me to shoot my load. She didn't even clean me up after, instead throwing me a piece of paper towel. I would highly recommend everybody skips this rip off merchant.

That did it anyway, night done, all I want to do now is get pissed and more stoned. Where is the best place to do that til late on a cold wet Monday night in January? La Vie En Proost of course!

I ordered a beer, forgetting about the change on the tits routine so that ended up costing me a tenner. It was pretty quiet but a few in. The first bar all the seats were taken but the second with the poles was pretty empty with a couple of bespectacled virgins giggling at the back wall because they'd just seen a ladies boobies.

I plonk myself down next to the poles, two girls on stage, one tall black piece and another blonde in ripped denim hotpants covered in tattoos. Excellent I thought, I'll collar her for a 20 euro dance when she comes over. No such luck, the black bird decided I was hers. Wouldn't take no for an answer, short of telling her to fuck off I don't know what else I could do. Whilst trying to get rid of her the blonde got off the stage and disappeared out to the changing room. Oh well, I'll have a go with that later I thought, if I can ever get rid of this black piece. After 20 minutes she eventually got the message I think.

After a few more beers, being robbed by the old change on the tits routine a few more times two very notable girls came onto the platform. One had a body to die for and an exceptionally beautiful face. However, it became apparent within about two minutes that she didn't have a clue what she was doing and couldn't dance for toffee. The other one on the other hand looked like a 30 year old Pamela Anderson, fake tits but very good at what she does. 20 euros for a full nude dance later I was very pleased with my investment. Realism struck by the fact that if I couldn't even feel a twinge in my cock after having her legs wrapped around me gyrating then another 50 euros in a Kamer probably wasn't going to be the wisest of investments. Pissed, stoned and happy I took the short stroll back to the hotel skinning another one up and investing in a double burger and chips of some description to bloat me out that bit further.

Next morning... Got up, didn't feel too bad actually. However, really need a shit. It was a bloody good one too but still felt like a constipated Michelin man so decided against going for breakfast somewhere. So, after getting ready to catch my train what do I do with this hour I had set aside for food and coffee? Well, as I'm in the RLD...

My train left at 10.15, so if quick I could fit in a quick turn somewhere. I had a wander around Oudekerk and it's surrounds. Not great this time of the morning... All that was around was black BBW's, really not my kind of thing. I'm fat, therefore I really don't want to be rubbing beerguts with something the same size or bigger. I wandered a bit further along, no joy so headed back. I thought I'd have a quick peek just in case the fit Romanian was an early starter. No luck, all shut. Then, as if by magic, a rather nice blonde appeared on the corner of Tromp where the ridiculously attractive one was last night. This was a different girl, older but still a looker.

After a quick negotiation, (She actually laughed when I emphasised the what do I get for that question saying that she wasn't one of the rip off Bulgarian girls) I went inside. A good looking girl, blonde, shaved pussy, nice tits and at a guess I would say early 30's. She said she was Czech and goes by the name of Lucia.

Anyway, we had a quick chat and got down to business. 5 minutes of CBJ then she gets on top. I remember thinking she had fantastic muscles in her pussy, she really gave my cock a good squeeze when grinding herself into me. I liked that, that was fun. After a couple of minutes we switched to doggy and she had a fantastic arse. The ringpiece looked well worn and thought about enquiring as to it's availability but time was of the essence so thought I'd better not or I'd end up missing my train. Load shot, she cleaned me up and off I went. An enjoyable alternative to breakfast I thought still dribbling spunk down my leg as I bolted to central station!

After a couple of hours on the train I arrive at my home for the next day in Germany. What a shithole. Not in the grubby sense but there is truly fuck all here. I spend a night, get drunk in the hotel bar and then gleefully catch my train to Dortmund for my flight home on the Wednesday...

I had deliberately left myself a few hours free time in Dortmund as the RLD is close to the Hauptbahnhoff and I thought I'd take in a visit or two there.

After having a coffee and another shit at the train station I decided now was a good time to stroll up to see what was about. It's about a 5 minute walk to a blocked off street if you come out of the backside of the station. It was probably about 4PM now and there were a few cars coasting up and down as well as some punters on the prowl. Dortmunds RLD is basically kamer style but in the form of old houses. Having a walk along I was not overly impressed, all a bit rough looking, lots of miserable looking latinos who spring to life the minute they get eye contact then call you something when you carry on walking.

I got towards the end and what appeared to be blonde hair was talking to some creepy looking guy at her door, hopefully he'll fuck off I thought, I reached the end and turned back (Probably only 300m worth of RLD). He was still there, bollocks so I walked very slowly down the road. I then noticed him walking off so turned around and went back for a closer look. Good job I did I thought as in this door was an absolute fucking gem, about 5'8", blonde, fantastic body, and I mean a great body. Reminded me of Britney back in the good old days, aged around 20 I'd say. She opened the door, quick negotiation in pigeon English, 35 euro S&F. Bargain, I'd be paying £300+ per hour at home for a girl who looked like this.

One thing I would say about Dortmund's RLD is it may look similar to Amsterdam, but they are not Kamers! After climbing 3 flights of stairs we arrive at her room. What a shithole, it absolutely stunk of stale sex, piss and shit (Worryingly). It was a complete tip, the sheets looked like they hadn't been washed in a week on her single bed. Oh well I thought, if it looks this good I can breathe through my mouth and just focus on her eyes as they were fantastic. The small talk was a non starter, it quickly became apparent that the "Little" English that she spoke was in fact only "35 euro" and nothing else apart from "London". We both stripped off, the old boy was full of life at the prospect of nailing this young beauty, lovely tits I thought for the umpteenth time on this trip. She started CBJ, not bad, not bad at all. A bit too eager on the wanking, had to slow her down there otherwise I'd shoot all over the place before getting started.

A couple of minutes later she moves me out of the way and lies on her back ready for missionary. I'm not usually a fan when I'm paying for it, that's all I get at home with the missus, but thought this time I'd make an exception as she was gorgeous with the most fantastic big eyes. However, she then opened her legs... The waft of stale sex-girl was awful and she had done a very bad attempt at shaving it. She had better stubble than me. At this point again I just thought fuck it, look into the eyes. But it was terrible, lifeless, motionless, wouldn't look at me, it must be what raping a dead Dolphin would feel and smell like. So, struggling to maintain a stiffy I beckoned her to bend over. Breathing out of my mouth I went in from behind and tried to get her arse and hips moving. Still like fucking a corpse. Then, to add insult to injury she pulls her mobile phone out from under the pillow and starts texting... Now, I may not be king dong but I've never had complaints, this however was a major piss take... Anyway, I hammered it into lubed up sewer and managed to force my bollocks to empty themselves. No cleaning up, just handed me a paper towel in silence and started to get dressed. To this day I cannot understand how something that looks that good can be such a sack of shit to have sex with. If I'd of just stuck with a CBJ and vigorous hand job I'd of walked away a happy man. However, I couldn't wait to get out of the place. I will not be revisiting the RLD in Dortmund, probably the worst I have been to in Europe, and I've frequented many.

I got back to the train station and now couldn't wait to get home. I cleaned my cock 5 or 6 times more that day but could still smell that room and her rotten girl. So two hits and two misses during my trip. I would recommend Victoria in Bethlemsteeg to anyone, she was fantastic and I will certainly be visiting her again if she's still there on my next trip. I will even do away with my no same girl twice in a day rule, and invest in a 100 euro session or two... Treat her well guys, and keep her motivated ;)

Simple Simon

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Re: Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns
« Reply #1 on: February 23, 2014, 07:01:36 AM »
TLDNR

James28

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Re: Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns
« Reply #2 on: February 23, 2014, 08:53:20 AM »
Haha. Wasted all that time writing that shit. A fat middle aged loser thinking he's relevant  :-\
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gmflex

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Re: Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns
« Reply #3 on: February 23, 2014, 10:26:52 AM »
I hope the guy in the story double bagged it  :-X

The Wizard of Truth

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Re: Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns
« Reply #4 on: February 23, 2014, 10:38:24 AM »
Haha. Wasted all that time writing that shit. A fat middle aged loser thinking he's relevant  :-\
like shizzo

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Re: Visits to amsterdam trip reports by Johns
« Reply #5 on: March 02, 2014, 07:13:03 AM »
not reading all this shit but he forgot to end your post with "then I woke up"  ::)