Just stop now. As lame as it is to go through the effort to find a log to use as a kickstand, it's even lamer that you would think a mountain bike is supposed to have one. 
As my brother is a high level mountain bike competitor, you are quite correct. Traditional, those actually used as MTB, don't have kick stands. But there are some that just buy a MTB because they think it's cool (never actually going into the mountains) and use it as touring bikes and will have one installed after market.
Needless to say, this is heavily frowned upon by the purist and shows that the rider is just a poseur.
Beef, hardcore badass fella that he is, no way is going to install no goddamn kick stand on his MTB.