waaaaaaaaaa you are getting funnier and funnier! Here's a good one:
Oh Viz?
My Mum had booked to visit me from Cheshire (200 miles travel maybe?) to where I live in London. Tomorrow she was supposed to come. She's getting on and had pre-booked the golf cart thingy at Manchester main train station and again at London Euston.
Then Virgin Trains announce they're doing engineering works and taking everyone off the train at Stockport and putting them on a coach. My Mum cancelled her visit. It's going to rain anyways and it turns out that this will be the worst ever traffic weekend, the emergency services are on overtime doubletime standby. The bus diversion would've been nasty. I was so looking forward to seeing my Mumsy. Oh well xL