What could possibly go wrong?

[pedro01]

I've been invited for an Indian meal on Saturday night and a 60k bike ride on Sunday morning.

I've sort of accepted both invitations.

Now I'm thinking that might not be the cleverest thing I've ever done.

[Knooger]

PIP

[_aj_]

60K is a couple hours at a moderate pace, right?

You'll be fine. Take a huge wad of TP just in case.

[Rami]

I've been invited for an Indian meal on Saturday night and a 60k bike ride on Sunday morning.

I've sort of accepted both invitations.

Now I'm thinking that might not be the cleverest thing I've ever done.

Eat the rice, potatoes and polenta like there is no tomorrow.

[Mr Anabolic]

Diarrhea streaming down your legs filling your shoes... what a sight that should be.

[Lustral]

Diarrhea streaming down your legs filling your shoes... what a sight that should be.

Would love to be that diarrhea those legs.

[TheShape.]

Apple cider vinegar. Drink some of it in some water and you'll have an iron stomach.

[Lustral]

[pedro01]

Eat the rice, potatoes and polenta like there is no tomorrow.

I'm English - it's genetically impossible for me not to ask "what's the hottest curry you've got?" when an Indian waiter asks me what I'd like for dinner.

Dogs bark, cats miaow and English men order curries they can't eat - then eat them - using copious quantities of Kingfisher to cool the lips.

I'll most likely call the waiter "Gupta" or "Ghandi" and possibly attempt to run out without paying the bill. Although my friends aren't English, so they'll stay behind & cover me on that score.

You can't turn around millions of years of evolution in one night.

[pedro01]

How did all that get to the front? He shit himself running backwards or something?

[Lustral]

I'm English - it's genetically impossible for me not to ask "what's the hottest curry you've got?" when an Indian waiter asks me what I'd like for dinner.

Dogs bark, cats miaow and English men order curries they can't eat - then eat them - using copious quantities of Kingfisher to cool the lips.

I'll most likely call the waiter "Gupta" or "Ghandi" and possibly attempt to run out without paying the bill. Although my friends aren't English, so they'll stay behind & cover me on that score.

You can't turn around millions of years of evolution in one night.

I eat a handful of chillies with most meals, has the added bonus that noone dares take a bite or they will be coughing with their eyes watering.

[Wiggs]

Attach a bag made of strong plastic to the hole of your butt.

[pedro01]

Attach a bag made of strong plastic to the hole of your butt.

Bag I get. Butthole I get.

Method of attachment - I'm not seeing it. Help me out.

[Lustral]

Being serious this happens to cyclists in the pro tours from time to time. In Paul Kimmage's book "Rough Ride" he was overtaken by a multiple Tour de France winner (probably Miguel Indurain given time period) and he said there was shit streaming down his leg and the smell was God awful but he just kept on going for the 200km or so.

[pedro01]

Being serious this happens to cyclists in the pro tours from time to time. In Paul Kimmage's book "Rough Ride" he was overtaken by a multiple Tour de France winner (probably Miguel Indurain given time period) and he said there was shit streaming down his leg and the smell was God awful but he just kept on going for the 200km or so.

I admire his dedication - but do you think that's appropriate for a first ride out with the cycling group my wife's yoga teacher goes out with?

I'm trying to make friends here. I think shitting myself in the first 5k and staying at the front of the pack might be a social faux pas.

[ChopperRider]

I admire his dedication - but do you think that's appropriate for a first ride out with the cycling group my wife's yoga teacher goes out with?

I'm trying to make friends here. I think shitting myself in the first 5k and staying at the front of the pack might be a social faux pas.

Not for a Getbigger.

Getbiggers NEVER apologize.

[Lustral]

I admire his dedication - but do you think that's appropriate for a first ride out with the cycling group my wife's yoga teacher goes out with?

I'm trying to make friends here. I think shitting myself in the first 5k and staying at the front of the pack might be a social faux pas.

Don't stay at the front, keep attacking from the back so everyone gets a whiff  

I can imagine your wife's yoga class coming up with nicknames for you over a cup of chai tea.

[the trainer]

I've been invited for an Indian meal on Saturday night and a 60k bike ride on Sunday morning.

I've sort of accepted both invitations.

Now I'm thinking that might not be the cleverest thing I've ever done.

Its actually a very smart move, the stench from the curry coming from your body should upset the stomach of the riders causing them to go slower and increase your chance of winning the race.

[pedro01]

Its actually a very smart move, the stench from the curry coming from your body should upset the stomach of the riders causing them to go slower and increase your chance of winning the race.

It's not a race. Just a social group of riders who presumably like to go out without the foul stench of liquid excrement in the morning.

[ChopperRider]

It's not a race. Just a social group of riders who presumably like to go out without the foul stench of liquid excrement in the morning.

Bullshit.....it's a race if we say it is.   

[falco]