I never said anything about being an arsehole, but your approach reeks of fear and desperation. Trying to be the ultimate man, the great lover, the giver etc etc. Women can see through that shit a mile away, your insecurity will be on show for everyone to see. A woman may play along for the freebies for a short time, but soon tire of your overcompensating ways and move on to a man more relaxed, easy going and confident in himself. A man who doesn't feel a need to jump through hoops to attract her attention, a man who doesn't feel he has to pull out all the stops to prove he is the ultimate love making machine. A man capable of just being himself, a man.
Starting to sound more like a melt down to me.
Some people like holidays and nice restaurants, deal with it. I'm not busting my ass working 12 hours a day so I can chill with a girl in the local shitty pub with a pint and a packet of crisp "cos I'm secure and don't wana jump through hoops for her"
What's wrong with a guy trying to indulge in the finer things in life, and bringing a women he likes into his bubble without someone going on about, being oneself, insecurities, jumping through hoops....etc.