have you ever been best man

[nzmusclemonster]

At a wedding?

Did you complement the bridesmaids tits in your speech?

[gracie bjj]

no i was never important enough to any of my freinds

[BigCyp]

no i was never important enough to any of my freinds

Lol, you must suck bro. 

[thegamechanger]

no i will not show up to weddings, not even my own

[Big Chiro Flex]

Yes twice and I incorporated the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into my speech both times

[no one]

I was best man at a Macedonian wedding. 500 people I had never met. only knew the bride and groom. in my speech I focused on addressing them each seperately. it was not a funny speech but I made the opening lighthearted enough. it was a speech based in sincerity for two very good friends.

at the end of the night the videographer came to me and said in the decade plus he's been doing it it was one of the best speeches he'd heard.

weddings are important occasions. the day two people commit to eachother in front of their friends for the rest of their lives. everyone expects you to try to be the funny guy as that's kind of what it's turned into. if you want to make an impact be sincere and speak to both of then individually as if you were in a room w each of them alone.

prepare to have her mom/dad cry and people you don't know shaking your hand all night and wanting to buy you drinks.

[BigCyp]

I was best man at a Macedonian wedding. 500 people I had never met. only knew the bride and groom. in my speech I focused on addressing them each seperately. it was not a funny speech but I made the opening lighthearted enough. it was a speech based in sincerity for two very good friends.

at the end of the night the videographer came to me and said in the decade plus he's been doing it it was one of the best speeches he'd heard.

weddings are important occasions. the day two people commit to eachother in front of their friends for the rest of their lives. everyone expects you to try to be the funny guy as that's kind of what it's turned into. if you want to make an impact be sincere and speak to both of then individually as if you were in a room w each of them alone.

prepare to have her mom/dad cry and people you don't know shaking your hand all night and wanting to buy you drinks.

I was there, thought it was shit.

[Man of Steel]

Just once

[CalvinH]

I was there, thought it was shit.

Same,speech almost put me to sleep but luckily the mother in law was fondling me under the table

[El Diablo Blanco]

3 different times.  Worst was they wanted a formal wedding, black tux etc... but do it outdoors in a Garden.  It was about 100 Degrees with 100% humidity.  I thought I was going to fucking die.  I was drenched.

Ended up fucking the brides cousin on one occasion.

[pedro01]

Yes - it was horrible.

Had a mate tell me some Welsh bint had called him - they'd met on holiday. His car was fucked, so I lent him mine to go see her. He hadn't seen her for 3 years.

He comes back in the morning asking me to be his best man. I only said yes because I presumed he wouldn't actually be dumb enough to do it.

This girl was hot - but nuts.

So 3 months later, me & him are in the valleys - some total fucking shitehole Welsh town. I stayed @ her place that night - she stayed @ her moms. I remember my wallet falling off the bedside table, I got down on all fours and it had landed on a used tampon. Filthy cu nt.

Anyway next day - I'm out and about and it's blatantly obvious every fucker in the valley has had a piece of this chick.  We went to get our suits and he's having second thoughts and I'm giving him my car keys telling him to do a runner. He was convinced for a second but I lost him and he went thru with it.

So there I am giving my speech and all these Welsh Chavs are fucking shouting "put the karaoke on". Well - I stood up, spoke up & shut up.

Marriage lasted 6 months.

[Leatherneck]

My best man left his written out speech at 3 hours from the reception site. What ensued was a speech that talked about people using his bathroom and rhinestone jeans that I don't wear. Talk about a train wreck.

[Powerlift66]

I said "I'd  like to propose a toast" and pulled a piece of burnt toast out of my pocket... Crickets chirping...

[Red Hook]

no i will not show up to weddings, not even my own

lol 

[irishdave]

what loser would ask a cross-dressing, non-lifting twat like you to be his best man? you must have been 3rd choice after Peewee Herman and Ernest Worrell were busy washing their hair that night.

[oldtimer1]

The last wedding I went to the best man went on about how many women the groom had. It was the worst speech ever. You could hear crickets in the room. Just zero class. Maybe it would have gone over better in a back yard wedding at a trailer park. Then again that's an insult to people living in a trailer park.

[gracie bjj]

Lol, you must suck bro. 

i got over it though

[nzmusclemonster]

what loser would ask a cross-dressing, non-lifting twat like you to be his best man? you must have been 3rd choice after Peewee Herman and Ernest Worrell were busy washing their hair that night.

Did I say someone has asked me to be their best man?

No.

Try and keep up thicko.

[funk51]

i'm always the best man wherever i go. ma and my guns tell me so....

[Andy Griffin]

At a wedding?

Did you complement the bridesmaids tits in your speech?

Great thread, Jamie.

[smoothasf]

Yes - it was horrible.

Had a mate tell me some Welsh bint had called him - they'd met on holiday. His car was fucked, so I lent him mine to go see her. He hadn't seen her for 3 years.

He comes back in the morning asking me to be his best man. I only said yes because I presumed he wouldn't actually be dumb enough to do it.

This girl was hot - but nuts.

So 3 months later, me & him are in the valleys - some total fucking shitehole Welsh town. I stayed @ her place that night - she stayed @ her moms. I remember my wallet falling off the bedside table, I got down on all fours and it had landed on a used tampon. Filthy cu nt.

Anyway next day - I'm out and about and it's blatantly obvious every fucker in the valley has had a piece of this chick.  We went to get our suits and he's having second thoughts and I'm giving him my car keys telling him to do a runner. He was convinced for a second but I lost him and he went thru with it.

So there I am giving my speech and all these Welsh Chavs are fucking shouting "put the karaoke on". Well - I stood up, spoke up & shut up.

Marriage lasted 6 months.

Haha Rhondda valley's by any chance?

[deadz]

Friends are for suckers.

[tom joad]

at our wedding, my bride had over 100 guests there and I had just 2.

[Red Hook]

at our wedding, my bride had over 100 guests there and I had just 2.

this sounds like my situation.

I can't think of anyone other maybe 1 or 2 friends that I would want to invite. 

basically you paid to feed and entertain 100 people, 95% of which you probably only see once per year at the most. 

[WannaBePro]

at our wedding, my bride had over 100 guests there and I had just 2.

I'm in the exact same boat. Other than my parents and brother, I know about 10 people I'd invite and I doubt they'd all show up haha. My gf on the other hand has a huge family who all live across North America, mostly Canada.
So once the day comes I'll personally know about 15 people and the other 100 will be complete strangers to me.