Author Topic: The gorilla diet (Read 5666 times)

the trainer · « **on:** October 06, 2014, 10:35:42 AM »

As you know gorillas are big and strong with huge muscles that can rip a human apart and all they eat is plants seeds and fruits so if you want to look like a gorilla you have to eat like a gorilla, so I present the gorilla diet to turn you into a beast.

Breakfast
bow of cereal with chia,hemp,pomegranate,flax pumpking seeds, banana and berries with coconut milk.

Lunch
salad with spinach,brocoli,celery, califlower,asparagus and avacado, with a glass of coconut milk.

Dinner
salad with spinach,brocoli,celery, califlower,asparagus and avacado, with a glass of coconut milk.

_aj_ · « **Reply #1 on:** October 06, 2014, 10:36:50 AM »

Troll Score: 0/10

Hulkotron · « **Reply #2 on:** October 06, 2014, 10:37:07 AM »

Quote from: Big Dicked Bob on July 22, 2014, 11:15:16 PM

I dick down two whores in the afternoon.
I dick down two whores at night.
I dick down two whores before I dick down two whores then I dick down two whores.

Var City · « **Reply #3 on:** October 06, 2014, 11:38:13 AM »

Quote from: _aj_ on October 06, 2014, 10:36:50 AM

Troll Score: 0/10

Papper · « **Reply #4 on:** October 06, 2014, 01:26:22 PM »

stay on the greens and drink water. and train moderately. never injure yourself.

live long and prosper.

peace.

The Onion · « **Reply #5 on:** October 06, 2014, 01:29:57 PM »

Quote from: the trainer on October 06, 2014, 10:35:42 AM

Breakfast
bow of cereal with chia,hemp,pomegranate,flax pumpking seeds, banana and berries with coconut milk.

What kind of cereal do gorillas eat?

Teutonic Knight · « **Reply #6 on:** October 06, 2014, 01:52:05 PM »

Coconut "MILK" , marketing BS

Papper · « **Reply #7 on:** October 06, 2014, 01:54:25 PM »

Quote from: The Onion on October 06, 2014, 01:29:57 PM

What kind of cereal do gorillas eat?

Lol

2Thick · « **Reply #8 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:35:51 PM »

I'd weigh about 100 pounds less than I do on such a "diet".

How big would the gorilla be if he added in 10 pounds of meat a day?

Royalty · « **Reply #9 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:41:42 PM »

Quote from: the trainer on October 06, 2014, 10:35:42 AM

As you know gorillas are big and strong with huge muscles that can rip a human apart and all they eat is plants seeds and fruits so if you want to look like a gorilla you have to eat like a gorilla, so I present the gorilla diet to turn you into a beast.

Breakfast
bow of cereal with chia,hemp,pomegranate,flax pumpking seeds, banana and berries with coconut milk.

Lunch
salad with spinach,brocoli,celery, califlower,asparagus and avacado, with a glass of coconut milk.

Dinner
salad with spinach,brocoli,celery, califlower,asparagus and avacado, with a glass of coconut milk.

following your logic, if a person wants to be able to fly.....they should eat some bird seeds.

and if a person wants to swim better.... eat fish food.

bradistani · « **Reply #10 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:42:32 PM »

gorillas do eat meat when the opportunity arises. eat insects too.

Schnauzer · « **Reply #11 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:44:57 PM »

Quote from: The Onion on October 06, 2014, 01:29:57 PM

What kind of cereal do gorillas eat?

~~Grape-Nuts~~ Ape-Nuts

Hulkotron · « **Reply #12 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:49:13 PM »

Quote from: 2Thick on October 06, 2014, 02:35:51 PM

I'd weigh about 100 pounds less than I do on such a "diet".

How big would the gorilla be if he added in 10 pounds of meat a day?

He may approach the muscular development of Mars.

the trainer · « **Reply #13 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:50:59 PM »

Quote from: 2Thick on October 06, 2014, 02:35:51 PM

I'd weigh about 100 pounds less than I do on such a "diet".

How big would the gorilla be if he added in 10 pounds of meat a day?

Take a look at this old school bodybuilder, he did not eat meat so your logic is flawed.

2Thick · « **Reply #14 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:52:27 PM »

Unlike most of us, he was a genetic superstud.

How big would HE be had he eaten 2-3 pounds of meat a day?

Quote from: the trainer on October 06, 2014, 02:50:59 PM

Take a look at this old school bodybuilder, he did not eat meat so your logic is flawed.

Skeletor · « **Reply #15 on:** October 06, 2014, 02:58:02 PM »

Quote from: The Onion on October 06, 2014, 01:29:57 PM

What kind of cereal do gorillas eat?

Thick Nick · « **Reply #16 on:** October 06, 2014, 04:57:33 PM »

I think I read somewhere gorillas eat upwards of like 20lbs of bananas a day?? Good luck with that.

Also...

Gorillas will pull their own shit out of their asses and re-eat it... so sounds like a perfect diet for you trainer.

the trainer · « **Reply #17 on:** October 06, 2014, 08:05:20 PM »

Quote from: Thick Nick on October 06, 2014, 04:57:33 PM

I think I read somewhere gorillas eat upwards of like 20lbs of bananas a day?? Good luck with that.

Also...

Gorillas will pull their own shit out of their asses and re-eat it... so sounds like a perfect diet for you trainer.

Bananas are one of the best thing for bulking eat plenty of bananas and coconut milk and you will be big like the gorilla.

jude2 · « **Reply #18 on:** October 06, 2014, 08:12:45 PM »

Quote from: 2Thick on October 06, 2014, 02:52:27 PM

Unlike most of us, he was a genetic superstud.

How big would HE be had he eaten 2-3 pounds of meat a day?

He would have been huge.

Teutonic Knight · « **Reply #19 on:** October 06, 2014, 09:09:49 PM »

Quote from: the trainer on October 06, 2014, 08:05:20 PM

Bananas are one of the best thing for bulking eat plenty of bananas and coconut milk and you will be big like the gorilla.

Get real, there is no Coconut milk + no coconuts in big monkey diet,
also gorilla snaps banana palm & eats juicy parts .

I have about 15-20 banana palms & don't eat them at all, so.

FermiDirac · « **Reply #20 on:** October 06, 2014, 10:05:09 PM »

Quote from: Skeletor on October 06, 2014, 02:58:02 PM

Imagine the rustled jimmies you would get from eating those cereals every morning.

ESFitness · « **Reply #21 on:** October 07, 2014, 02:20:40 AM »

sadly, I know somebody who follows a diet like this.. nothing but bananas and nuts.. almond milk and "alkaline" water.lol

fucker lost ALLLLLLL his muscle and people think he's sick. (used to look like he WAS/COULD BE a personal trainer... now he looks like he NEEDS a personal trainer. lol)

Costanza · « **Reply #22 on:** October 07, 2014, 02:27:07 AM »

Quote from: FermiDirac on October 06, 2014, 10:05:09 PM

Imagine the rustled jimmies you would get from eating those cereals every morning.

O.Z. · « **Reply #23 on:** October 07, 2014, 02:50:08 AM »

Quote from: the trainer on October 06, 2014, 10:35:42 AM

As you know gorillas are big and strong with huge muscles that can rip a human apart and all they eat is plants seeds and fruits so if you want to look like a gorilla you have to eat like a gorilla, so I present the gorilla diet to turn you into a beast.

Breakfast
bow of cereal with chia,hemp,pomegranate,flax pumpking seeds, banana and berries with coconut milk.

Lunch
salad with spinach,brocoli,celery, califlower,asparagus and avacado, with a glass of coconut milk.

Dinner
salad with spinach,brocoli,celery, califlower,asparagus and avacado, with a glass of coconut milk.

do you?

the trainer · « **Reply #24 on:** October 07, 2014, 07:32:28 AM »

Quote from: ESFitness on October 07, 2014, 02:20:40 AM

sadly, I know somebody who follows a diet like this.. nothing but bananas and nuts.. almond milk and "alkaline" water.lol

fucker lost ALLLLLLL his muscle and people think he's sick. (used to look like he WAS/COULD BE a personal trainer... now he looks like he NEEDS a personal trainer. lol)

He did not lose all his muscles most likely he lost all his bodyfat and now he looks skinny in a shirt but I bet he looks good with the shirt off, you should tell him to increase the bananas and add coconut milk to help gain weight.