What I meant was I had either won or came second in all my shows since returning to bodybuilding. At the nabba worlds I was not even placed in the top 6. It made me more introspective.
Meditation gives me a great deal of fulfilment. Its remarkable that something so simple (and seemingly lazy to the uneducated) can bring such joy.
It got to the point when I was competing that I didnt really care where I placed, I just did my best got onstage and let the chips fall.
My last show I placed 3rd, a few people said I should have won, (I know, we all get that), I just said, it means more to win to the guy who won than it would have done to me so good luck to him, let him enjoy it.