Dingleberries?

[Howard]

Problem with brand  of TP or wipe technique? discuss

[SF1900]

What i find fascinating is that with all this technology, we still rely on handful wads of paper to wipe ourselves.

Why hasn't anyone invented something that is more efficient? 

[Howard]

To be fair there are always flushable moist wipes and/or your mother's tongue.

Aaaaah, yes, the pre-moistened  wipes. 
The pleasure of wet bunghole ecstasy  without  having to kiss the provider after the act.

[che]

What i find fascinating is that with all this technology, we still rely on handful wads of paper to wipe ourselves.

Why hasn't anyone invented something that is more efficient? 

Oh brother , you must be American .

[SF1900]

To be fair there are always flushable moist wipes and/or your mother's tongue.

But even with the moist wipes, you still have to use your hand. They need to invent a machine that cleans you out.

And the mother joke was sort of expected and played out, especially on Getbig. But hey, the most important thing is you attempted to make a joke. I applaud your efforts.

[SF1900]

Oh brother , you must be American .

Eh, they still need to invent something more useful

 

[SF1900]

Look into the drilldo, sounds like you might find it appealing.

[Howard]

Eh, they still need to invent something more useful

 

The French are famous for good bread, and tight, clean bungholes.

[240 is Back]

shave your ass hair.   eat right. drink a lot of water.    won't be a problem.

oh, and avoid drinking boxed red wine  

[jephrius]

I just sent Ron a PM asking him to remove this thread. OP should be banned for being a mental retard.

[Howard]

I just sent Ron a PM asking him to remove this thread. OP should be banned for being a mental retard.

Obviously, the dignity and IQ of my getbig bros, has been butthurt

[calfzilla]

I do like the Indians and just use my bare hand. 

[Howard]

I do like the Indians and just use my bare hand. 

hardcore 

[oldtimer1]

We should be shooting water up at our butts instead of rubbing dry toilet paper on it. I always wet the paper if I can reach a sink and the majority of the time take a shower after. Every toilet should have a button you push to spray nice warm water at your butt then you dry with toilet paper.

I have officially hit rock bottom replying to this post. I have to get some help.

[calfzilla]

True story:

    Couple summers ago went camping near a river. A family arrived late and camped pretty close to us but no big deal. Anyway the next morning after packing up camp, before leaving I knew the other campers would take our better spot, so I went down to the little trail leading down to the river (knowing they would later go down there) and dropped a deuce right on the middle of the trail. Wiped with wet wipes but threw them in the bushes so they would see the pile of feces. Idiots probably stepped in it and tracked it into their tent. 

[jephrius]

Obviously, the dignity and IQ of my getbig bros, has been butthurt

You're a clown.

[TheShape.]

My cat keeps getting dingleberries on his furry little ass. Cute old fucker.

[el numero uno]

shave your ass hair.   eat right. drink a lot of water.    won't be a problem.

oh, and avoid drinking boxed red wine  

This!

[SaintAnger]

Been using moist towelettes, but recently bought a top selling bidet attachment.  Cheap and it works great!

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B001KKRCFA/ref=pe_385040_121528360_TE_dp_1

[BIG ACH]

This is my area of expertise!!!

Buy a bidet, you can install them right on your current toilets, so that way you can power wash your ass and rid yourself of dingleberries, than wipe with toilet paper!



Can buy it on Amazon for 40 bucks:  http://www.amazon.com/LUXE-Bidet-Vi-110-Non-Electric-Mechanical/dp/B005IT4C6G/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1415436041&sr=8-6&keywords=luxe+bidet

I have one installed in every bathroom in my house

And when I'm on the road I have this travel portable bidet:



Also on Amazon:  http://www.amazon.com/Olympia-Travel-Bidet-Model-TB-200/dp/B003CTI6UM/ref=sr_1_17?ie=UTF8&qid=1415436218&sr=8-17&keywords=travel+bidet


Trust me your ass will thank you!!!

[visualizeperfection]

This ass hose water spraying device is unsettling to me, to say the least.


So, you spray a non disinfectant liquid to jettison poo poo particles all over the inside of your ass cheeks and balls.... then you just get up carry on with life?


"Hey Bob, how's life?" "Ah Jim, it's great!, other than the fact I have shit water caked to my balls".

[BIG ACH]

This ass hose water spraying device is unsettling to me, to say the least.


So, you spray a non disinfectant liquid to jettison poo poo particles all over the inside of your ass cheeks and balls.... then you just get up carry on with life?


"Hey Bob, how's life?" "Ah Jim, it's great!, other than the fact I have shit water caked to my balls".

Its not shit water... its the same water that links to the tank of your toilet which is clean.  You spray your ass to clean it... correction POWER WASH IT... then you wipe with toilet paper!  Trust me, your ass is so fresh and clean after...


Here is a review of a westerner who started using a bidet, and how much he likes it now:  http://gizmodo.com/5887473/the-swash-1000-bidet-toilet-seat-review-this-will-change-the-way-you-poop (albeit he started using a very expensive Bidet)

Note this is a bidet company which BILLIONAIRE MARK CUBAN has invested in:  http://markcubancompanies.com/index.html#/brondell

[visualizeperfection]

Its not shit water... its the same water that links to the tank of your toilet which is clean.  You spray your ass to clean it... correction POWER WASH IT... then you wipe with toilet paper!  Trust me, your ass is so fresh and clean after...


Here is a review of a westerner who started using a bidet, and how much he likes it now:  http://gizmodo.com/5887473/the-swash-1000-bidet-toilet-seat-review-this-will-change-the-way-you-poop (albeit he started using a very expensive Bidet)

Note this is a bidet company which BILLIONAIRE MARK CUBAN has invested in:  http://markcubancompanies.com/index.html#/brondell

Yes, it is shit water, after it has mixed with the shit stuck to your asshole.

Im happy the BILLIONAIRE MARK CUBAN endorses these asshole squirt guns. It just doesn't make sense to me. I properly wipe my asshole post shit with Charmin with aloe. My asshole feels clean enough to let most unscrupulous whores dine on it after a heavy night of partying.

[B_B_C]

Dr Loserman is the authority in this matter
http://www.getbig.com/boards/index.php?topic=402694.msg5726411

[bigkubby]

This is my area of expertise!!!

Buy a bidet, you can install them right on your current toilets, so that way you can power wash your ass and rid yourself of dingleberries, than wipe with toilet paper!



Can buy it on Amazon for 40 bucks:  http://www.amazon.com/LUXE-Bidet-Vi-110-Non-Electric-Mechanical/dp/B005IT4C6G/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1415436041&sr=8-6&keywords=luxe+bidet

I have one installed in every bathroom in my house

And when I'm on the road I have this travel portable bidet:



Also on Amazon:  http://www.amazon.com/Olympia-Travel-Bidet-Model-TB-200/dp/B003CTI6UM/ref=sr_1_17?ie=UTF8&qid=1415436218&sr=8-17&keywords=travel+bidet


Trust me your ass will thank you!!!

is it safe to say your not leaving shit stains on motel beds anymore? Lmao