Perhaps this isn't the right person or the right time for you. In most relationships, sex wanes after awhile. In your situation this seems to have happened early on. When the relationship is right, it will meet each of your needs and desires on many levels. Companionship and friendship can last indefinitely with the right people. In the long run, these are more important to a relationship than lust or great sex.
If sex were the keynote of my wife and my relationship, it would have been over before it got started. These days, sex is non-existent for a number of reasons, mostly health. I guarantee you that love can still be strong in the absence of sexual contact.
We are and old couple. We know what each other is going to say before they say it. There are still surprises though. Personally we believe in being independent and not doing everything together. It has worked for us. I will say that presently, not doing things together and finding time apart is more difficult because of my wife's health. She is no longer driving which means I take her wherever she needs to go. Some people would find this incredibly boring and it can be at times. It is also comforting to be needed and to be a caregiver in times of need. It definitely beats being old and completely alone.
I get what you're saying.
And even tho I emphasized on sex, the lack of sex isn't really the problem. It's just those other 'non existing problems' that become problems. Something said in a 'certain way', being quite for too long can set that up too and then the whole evening is ruined. Sex could take the edge off, but like you said sex isn't what makes relationship. It can be very important and on the surface when you're under 50 but it's not what makes you be together untill death sepparates.
Secondly I've learned that people now days quit very easily. Especially from these type of non existing things, there are bound to be arguments and bad air but that should be worked on allways.
Maybe this is not the right time for me, but when is the time? When I met her my motivation was purely sex and hers too, but we just clicked, and even tho we both avoided it we somehow always managed to find more and more love in it and here we are. I'm a cynic, I don't fall for every woman I meet, I allways know the passion is a fading trade and that I should keep my distance. She had the same philosophy.
To be honest I have no idea how rich and all the time travelling people can find someone they never cheat on etc. People allways talk about how they wait for the perfect one when there is no perfect one, women don't get better when you change them, because same problems in a differend mask will commence anyway. There's allways problems. But then you think that there's so many fish in the sea. And the witch circle continues on and on.
When does someone start to think that "at least you have family and kids" because I'm not the kind of person, now anyway, who would just like to be together with 'someone'. I love my own Company but we have many things uniting us that can be a great investment for the future. Then again, plenty of fish in the sea, but then again, and then again, and then again.
In the gym I see these 40-50 year old couples that obviously just met, and to me it's sad. How do you know at 50 that this is the one this time? You don't. I bet they are together because they are just tirred of being alone "and like to be needed sometimes", but what kind of relationship is that then? No offence. I bet they are still in the nursery home putting adds on the newspaper "70 year old single woman looking for someone to enjoy tea with", god that's terrible.
Do you think that maybe some people just don't really need a relationship? Why do these emotions then tell you otherwise, that 'this is it, this is the best' every blue moon even tho you need to fight to keep it in the end, in your mind and with your partner..
