You're gay. Obviously you already know that, because you told us at the dinner table last night. I apologize for the awkward silence afterwards, but I was chewing. It was like when we're at a restaurant and the waiter comes up mid-bite and asks how the meal is, only in this metaphor you are the waiter, and instead of asking me about my meal, you said you were gay. I don't know why I needed to explain that. I think I needed to find a funny way to repeat the fact that you're gay... because that is what it sounds like in my head right now: "bigmc is gay. bigmc is gay. bigmc is gay."
Let me be perfectly clear: Since being gay is part of who you are, It's fine that you're gay. I'm just trying to wrap my head around the idea. If you sensed any sadness in my silence last night, it was because I was surprised that I was surprised. Ideally, I would have already known. Since you were an member on Getbig, my intent has always been to really know you for who you are and not who I expect you to be. And yet, I was taken by surprise at last night's dinner.
I am still, as always, your biggest defender. Just because you're gay doesn't mean you're any less capable of taking care of and defending yourself. That said, if you need me to stand next to you or in front of you, write letters, sign petitions, advocate, or anything else, I am here. I would go to war for you.
If you're going to have boys over, you now need to leave your bedroom door open. Sorry, bigmc. Them's the breaks. I couldn't have girls in my room with the door shut, so you don't get to have boys.
You and I are going to revisit that talk we had about safe sex. I know it's going to be awkward for both of us, but it is important. I need to do some research first, so let's give it a few weeks. If you have questions or concerns before then, let me know.
Love, Shizzo
