Dude is a scared little boy. He is aware of everything. And if you watch his eyes u can see a little scared boy inside! He know the body is almost done, he know the pain, he know the feeling he got every morning, he know he can be dead any minute, he know he is a grey old man, he know the wife will leave him in a second if u stop making cash or loose the muscles. He know he is criminal, made all his money seling drugs. He know everything...but trying to cover up as good as he can. Most of his followers dosent see all this! It take a profesional mature getbigger to se all this...
Dude is near a collaps almost every day, praying it dosent happen!