Happy Monday. Let's get this news cycle for the week started.
Off we go with Iran saying that they will NOT be parting with the enriched uranium. It is "as sacred as Iranian soil." Guess El Lardo was lying about that last week when he said they agreed to it.
Trumpy loses - again

- in his besodden Minnesota voter roll case. This is what? the 5th or 6th time.
That beef with the Pope isn't a case of #winning at all when your sycophants are claiming that the Pope doesn't know the Bible and then your alcoholic weirdo comes out and quotes a fake Bible verse from Pulp Fiction.
Speaking of alcoholic weirdos : the epic DEI hire Koke Eye Kash is attempting to keep his head off the chopping block by suing the Atlantic for $250M for reporting his staff and colleagues were concerned with his drinking, unexplained absences, tardiness to meetings because he hadn't slept off the partying from the night before... which “often alarmed officials at the FBI and the Department of Justice.” That leaked photo of this dweeb with his rum looked like a joke at first... looks different now.
And if the lawsuit against The Atlantic doesn't pan out, this non-genius has a back up plan to stay in Trumpy's good graces. He claims the agency has "evidence" that the 2020 election was stolen from Trumpy and to "stay tuned this week." Pretty sure this is nothing more than him drunk stumbling into the Mike Lindell's "evidence" folder. Which as we all know, contained absolutely NOTHING. Obviously he was passed out when the latest Trumpy lawyer Eastman was disbarred last week over his nonsense claims and court filings regarding the 2020 election and Trumpy's lies.
Already gone is Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer. The White House said Monday, after multiple allegations of abusing her position’s power, including having an affair with a subordinate and drinking alcohol on the job. So many drunks...
That moron behind Latinos for Trump was deported after spending 110 days in custody. How did that vote work out for you?

(no evidence yet if he is a drunk too)
Melania is now set to appear with her ball and chain at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner. I mean her ratings can't get any lower can they? Her, Trumpy and JD seem to be at the bottom of the modern historic barrel right now. But at least she will see in person the reason her husband will be rage posting in the middle of the night later and painting the walls with Heinz.
That last grifting attempt by Trumpy selling membership to view his national security briefings went over so well, he is back again. Did you expect differently? This time he is offering to sell you a job. Kind of the exact opposite of what a "job" is right? The president is offering his MAGA base a new phony gig—so long as they can cough up the cash. A fundraising email sent on behalf of President Donald Trump invites donors to become a part of the “Official 2026 TRUMP INNER CIRCLE,” described as Trump’s “elite Midterm Advisory Board.” Perks of the new bogus board position include “breaking Trump Alerts first,” “private midterm strategy updates,” and access to more Trump merchandise. No word yet if this "job" is being offered to sober non drinkers.

Obviously that Diet Coke is killing more than just cancer cells. Or maybe it is the "very very thin blood" that he likes circulating through him for all these disasters. It's only Monday, so you KNOW there is more to come. But don't let it keep you from making your usual and predictable excuses, deflections, pivots, weird ass gay projections and childish diatribe.