How to get the girls in ibiza...

[10pints]

This had me in stitches. Some classic lines in here. Sounds like it was written by Joon & Tunza Muscle.


"It goes without saying, but make sure you’re in shape. A lot of the guys in Ibiza are jacked. While it’s not necessary to be Arnie to get some action, you should at least do as much as you can to cut fat and build upper body definition before you go. Your aim in every element of your presentation should be to make the biggest impact possible. If you wear your hair in a pompadour, make that thing huge. If you walk with a swagger, exaggerate it.  Read my article on developing insane self love. The clubs in Ibiza are big, brash and loud and you need to be the same if you want girls to pay attention to you."

http://www.returnofkings.com/38209/how-to-get-laid-in-ibiza

[phreak]

Tip 1-∞: be the one that has the drugs. Worked for me.


Shout out to the Blue Marlin though, that was nice when it opened up. Not sure if it is still trendy?

[Hollyweird]

This had me in stitches. Some classic lines in here. Sounds like it was written by Joon & Tunza Muscle.


"It goes without saying, but make sure you’re in shape. A lot of the guys in Ibiza are jacked. While it’s not necessary to be Arnie to get some action, you should at least do as much as you can to cut fat and build upper body definition before you go. Your aim in every element of your presentation should be to make the biggest impact possible. If you wear your hair in a pompadour, make that thing huge. If you walk with a swagger, exaggerate it.  Read my article on developing insane self love. The clubs in Ibiza are big, brash and loud and you need to be the same if you want girls to pay attention to you."

http://www.returnofkings.com/38209/how-to-get-laid-in-ibiza

That guide is how to dress like a guido and act like a desperate virgin in front of drunkard young girls.


Ibiza is about music and drugs - the meat market side of things is irrelevant.

Fucking homo nonsense.

[Kwon]

[Skylge]

This had me in stitches. Some classic lines in here. Sounds like it was written by Joon & Tunza Muscle.


"It goes without saying, but make sure you’re in shape. A lot of the guys in Ibiza are jacked. While it’s not necessary to be Arnie to get some action, you should at least do as much as you can to cut fat and build upper body definition before you go. Your aim in every element of your presentation should be to make the biggest impact possible. If you wear your hair in a pompadour, make that thing huge. If you walk with a swagger, exaggerate it.  Read my article on developing insane self love. The clubs in Ibiza are big, brash and loud and you need to be the same if you want girls to pay attention to you."

http://www.returnofkings.com/38209/how-to-get-laid-in-ibiza

Nice article, seems like a fun and beautiful place / island

But probably a lot easier and even cheaper to pay for tight young women. Saves a lot of hassle and time

[ratherbebig]

Nice article, seems like a fun and beautiful place / island

But probably a lot easier and even cheaper to pay for tight young women. Saves a lot of hassle and time

only real men dont pay for sex. so thats not an option.

[ESFitness]

Would not hit.

Face = lightbulb

Thighs = turnips

[Skylge]

only real men dont pay for sex. so thats not an option.

So Sinatra, Kiedis, Berlusconi and DeNiro aren't "real men"?     

[light weight baby]

the clubs in pattaya are pretty amazing

super modern and impressive infrastructure

epic dime piece prostitutes

drinks are criminally over priced tho

[ratherbebig]

So Sinatra, Kiedis, Berlusconi and DeNiro aren't "real men"?     

i can bring up a bunch of celebrities that hit women, that doesnt make them real men either regardless of what else theyve done.

[Skylge]

i can bring up a bunch of celebrities that hit women, that doesnt make them real men either regardless of what else theyve done.

When he was governor, Arnold had paydates with escort girls in hotel rooms. If he's not a "real man", then what are you?     

[8 INCH not biceps]

I discovered that by dressing like this on the beach in europe you will get all the girls.

[bike nut]

So Sinatra, Kiedis, Berlusconi and DeNiro aren't "real men"?     

DeNiro is not a real man.

He is a liberal sheep.

Real men are police officers, firefighters, and military personnel, not actors or lounge singers who wear makeup to do prance around on stage.

[light weight baby]

DeNiro is not a real man.

He is a liberal sheep.

Real men are police officers, firefighters, and military personnel, not actors or lounge singers who wear makeup to do prance around on stage.

tons of police officers are complete pussies

[devilsmile]

This had me in stitches. Some classic lines in here. Sounds like it was written by Joon & Tunza Muscle.


"It goes without saying, but make sure you’re in shape. A lot of the guys in Ibiza are jacked. While it’s not necessary to be Arnie to get some action, you should at least do as much as you can to cut fat and build upper body definition before you go. Your aim in every element of your presentation should be to make the biggest impact possible. If you wear your hair in a pompadour, make that thing huge. If you walk with a swagger, exaggerate it.  Read my article on developing insane self love. The clubs in Ibiza are big, brash and loud and you need to be the same if you want girls to pay attention to you."

http://www.returnofkings.com/38209/how-to-get-laid-in-ibiza

the same hoes that go to ibiza are in my local tinder area. All you need to say is few magic words like "hi, how are you, I'd like to go out with you" and they give you pussy. Pretty much how it goes.

[bike nut]

tons of police officers are complete pussies

Yes, you would be the Getbig expert on being a complete pussy.

[falco]

Ibiza is flooded with horny male homosexualls. Good luck

[light weight baby]

Ibiza is flooded with horny male homosexualls. Good luck

those are the worst type of homosexuals!

[Kwon]

Would not hit.

Face = lightbulb

Thighs = turnips

[Skorp1o]

Some of my best memories were crafted in Ibiza but I'm done with that ride, time to pass on the torch. If i re-did some of that shit now I'm almost 40 I'll probably die.

[10pints]

Some of my best memories were crafted in Ibiza but I'm done with that ride, time to pass on the torch. If i re-did some of that shit now I'm almost 40 I'll probably die.

x2

On one of the flights home, we hit bad turbulence, I felt like shit to the point of not caring if we crashed. My reasoning was: at least this booze / drug hangover would be done with.

[Julio Ceasar]

A girl like that doesn't look like that IRL. A girl like that look like that ONLY in pictures in certain poses with photoshop

This is an average cute wallmart hillbilly!

[Skylge]

DeNiro is not a real man.

He is a liberal sheep.

Real men are police officers, firefighters, and military personnel, not actors or lounge singers who wear makeup to do prance around on stage.

So only people working for the Government (= public servants) are "real men".....  hahaha     

[Skorp1o]

x2

On one of the flights home, we hit bad turbulence, I felt like shit to the point of not caring if we crashed. My reasoning was: at least this booze / drug hangover would be done with.

Yep, typical Ibiza goer we would party hard til the very last minute, then straight to the airport, flight back was always an awful experience...then I land in Manchester, get home and it's quiet and rainy and the girls outside are all pale and ugly and fully dressed and would question my whole existence and life and spend a while feeling low about it all lol.