Author Topic: Wise Sayings  (Read 4830 times)

Yamcha

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Wise Sayings
« on: January 04, 2017, 04:09:21 AM »
"When searching for Gary Oldman on the internet, make sure to never leave out the 'r'."
a

Simple Simon

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #1 on: January 04, 2017, 05:34:30 AM »
and if you do....

8 INCH not biceps

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #2 on: January 04, 2017, 05:58:27 AM »
At a bodybuilding show sit at the back in the dark section, when men in thong start posing do not take out your penis in case somebody sees simply  put your hands in your pants and do your thing.

Tapeworm

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #3 on: January 04, 2017, 06:02:13 AM »
Surly to bed & surly to rise.

falco

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #4 on: January 04, 2017, 06:20:22 AM »
If you don't use it you lose it.

deadz

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #5 on: January 04, 2017, 08:53:33 AM »
T

El Diablo Blanco

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #6 on: January 04, 2017, 01:16:43 PM »
I dick in the hand is worth less than a dick in two bushes.

SilverSpoon

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #7 on: January 04, 2017, 01:29:09 PM »
Men age like wine.
Women age like milk.  (this was told to me while I was tending bar way back in the day).

dj181

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #8 on: January 04, 2017, 01:36:21 PM »
Men age like wine.
Women age like milk.  (this was told to me while I was tending bar way back in the day).

kinda reminds me of a time when i was filling in for a fitness trainer friend of mine at a very exclusive health club, full of rich snobby @ssholes, and i mentioned something about assuming something

so he took a pen and paper and wrote "ass/u/me" and he said that when you assume you make an ass out of you and of me

ratherbebig

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #9 on: January 04, 2017, 02:13:13 PM »
when you search for cock on the internet, make sure you dont accidentely type rock


El Diablo Blanco

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #10 on: January 04, 2017, 02:20:39 PM »
If your family name is Hunt , don't name your kid Mike.

Howard

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #11 on: January 04, 2017, 02:24:59 PM »
 ;)You butt must be broken with that big crack in the middle. or    He who smelt it, dealt it.

Ok, here's some serious wisdom:

1.  There are more married, then happy.  

2. Men marry women and hope they won't change and they do.
Woman marry men hoping they will change and they don't.




Walter Sobchak

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #12 on: January 04, 2017, 03:24:12 PM »
In the locker room of life, never take your socks off last.

The Abdominal Snoman

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #13 on: January 04, 2017, 06:48:38 PM »

The Abdominal Snoman

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #14 on: January 04, 2017, 06:49:58 PM »

Every living creature on Earth will die alone

What other people think of me is none of my business

No matter how smoking hot she is, there's a guy out there that is sick of fucking her

FREAKgeek

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #15 on: January 04, 2017, 07:08:11 PM »
Sometimes you get the elevator, sometimes you get the shaft

Walter Sobchak

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #16 on: January 04, 2017, 07:08:23 PM »
"bigmc is a ginger twink Report to Mod crybaby"

-The Entire World

NelsonMuntz

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #17 on: January 04, 2017, 08:12:22 PM »
"Walter envies those who are able to do what he won't do; to let himself free from the closet he has barricaded himself in"- PrimeAnus

"

Walter Sobchak

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #18 on: January 04, 2017, 08:23:56 PM »
"Walter envies those who are able to do what he won't do; to let himself free from the closet he has barricaded himself in"- PrimeAnus


Awwww, the nutsack hanger doesn't know where to turn. No asshairs to hang off like the piece of shit dingleberry he is.

The lame fucking copycat and his shitty photoshops. Catch aids, then cancer phaggot.

Nirvana

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #19 on: January 04, 2017, 08:44:29 PM »
How to be wise: think of something stupid and don't say it.

Rudee

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #20 on: January 04, 2017, 08:48:10 PM »
There's a fine line between hyphenated words.

Walter Sobchak

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #21 on: January 04, 2017, 09:06:34 PM »
Skip over reading all Howard posts...

SOMEPARTS

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #22 on: January 04, 2017, 11:49:00 PM »
"I don't take kindly to disrespect. Not on the internet, not in person, not in a grocery store parking lot, not in line at Walmart, not in a restaurant, not at the beach, not at the dry cleaners...anywhere.

People talk about the 'pussyfication' of America, yet they run their mouths thinking they won't get slapped and get their arm broken in front of their friends.

Spent many years in a place where if you talk slick and say something out of line to somebody, you know that when you say it, you better be ready for what happens. most people here in the 'real world' aren't ready for what could happen...and run their mouths like the world is a make-believe cartoon. Despite wearing nice slacks, polished shoes and a nice shirt, the guy you steal that parking spot from at the grocery store and proceed to flip off, may have just gotten out of prison and will have no problem identifying the bitch in you and proceed to teach you a lesson by taking you down to the ground and kicking out your teeth before you even know what happened.

The guy who's willing to go the furthest, wins. If you're not willing to go all the way, it's best you keep your mouth shut and move on, and make it to the next day."

Tapeworm

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #23 on: January 05, 2017, 12:26:49 AM »
"I don't take kindly to disrespect. Not on the internet, not in person, not in a grocery store parking lot, not in line at Walmart, not in a restaurant, not at the beach, not at the dry cleaners...anywhere.

People talk about the 'pussyfication' of America, yet they run their mouths thinking they won't get slapped and get their arm broken in front of their friends.

Spent many years in a place where if you talk slick and say something out of line to somebody, you know that when you say it, you better be ready for what happens. most people here in the 'real world' aren't ready for what could happen...and run their mouths like the world is a make-believe cartoon. Despite wearing nice slacks, polished shoes and a nice shirt, the guy you steal that parking spot from at the grocery store and proceed to flip off, may have just gotten out of prison and will have no problem identifying the bitch in you and proceed to teach you a lesson by taking you down to the ground and kicking out your teeth before you even know what happened.

The guy who's willing to go the furthest, wins. If you're not willing to go all the way, it's best you keep your mouth shut and move on, and make it to the next day."

Pithy as fuck.

CalvinH

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Re: Wise Sayings
« Reply #24 on: January 05, 2017, 05:50:39 AM »
Never ask shizzo if he want's a drink.