The best advice I ever gave

[Howard]

Choose dbl ply and wipe 2x 

[JimmyJam1974]

I see your parents split when you were young. Think that is related to your own issues in relationships?

[NelsonMuntz]

If I was in your shoes, I'd join the Navy or Coast Guard."

He joined the Navy and had a 20 yr career.
At my mom's funeral, he reminded me of that conversation.
We had a good laugh and he smiled back saying;
" Thanks to you I dodged a bullet"

Quote from: CaptainFreedom on August 17, 2015, 09:35:43 AM
There is a man who sailed the seas,
to wage war on the enemies,
He would have fought so gallantly,
alas, if not, for his wounded knee

He checked his watch, and had a hunch,
that he just might be the first for lunch,
To the galley! he cried, and bid farewell,
then bolted for the ships stairwell,

But a man like he, was born to lose,
the stupid prick never tied his shoes.
The crash was like a nuclear bomb,
as cowhead hit the stairs full on,
how quickly things had gone so wrong.

Help me sir! he cried in pain,
i'll never bodybuild again!
but cowhead's cries were all in vain,
the casevac had never came.

So up he got, and faked a limp,
it's time to milk this, thought the human blimp,
I'll claim disability, and PTSD
and surely then i'll live for free,
stealing parking spaces from the elderly
its going to be so great, said he.

Some say he's a lying twat,
who looks like shit whether thin or fat,
but no not me, i won't stand for that!
cause Mike's my friend and that is that!

[Dave D]

Your best decision to date was to not procreate.

[JimmyJam1974]

Your best decision to date was to not procreate.

True for most

[Zillotch]

Your best decision to date was to not procreate.

do u think that it was his 'decision'? does this guy appear to be a genetically viable human? no, he does not.

[The True Adonis]

My younger step brother is 5 yrs younger then me.
He was out of high school and considering the military.

I had just been discharged from my 4 yr tour of USMC active duty .
I was home visiting family, when I saw him.

He was going to join the USMC and assumed I'd approve.
I pulled him aside and told him :

" There are better ways to serve your country and be part of the military.
God love ya for wanting to serve, but the marines aren't the best career option.
Yeah, I'm proud I survived boot camp on Parris Island. But , overall, I wish
I'd have chosen a different branch and military experience.

If I was in your shoes, I'd join the Navy or Coast Guard."

He joined the Navy and had a 20 yr career.
At my mom's funeral, he reminded me of that conversation.
We had a good laugh and he smiled back saying;
" Thanks to you I dodged a bullet"

I thought the best advice you ever gave was when you told Kenny Sprague  "Pull out slowly, I want it all over my lower back".  

[Zillotch]

I thought the best advice you ever gave was when you told Kenny Sprague  "Pull out slowly, I want it all over my lower back".  

as if his sphincter retains the elasticity required for a 'pull' out, lol

[Kahn.N.Singh]

Yeah, I'm proud I survived boot camp on Parris Island.

Yes, a part of the 85%-ile of all recruits. That's special!

[ratherbebig]

thank you for serving howard.

shame on getbiggers who talk the way they talk to you, a marine.

[Henda]

Your younger brother sounds like a homosexual of the highest order

[Taffin]

My parents divorced after 24 years when I was 20 and in the USMC.
They were great parents and I had an ideal "Leave It To Beaver "  childhood.

My dad was a Navy vet of WWII and Korea with a tireless work ethic.
He was a great father , but a lousy husband for my mom.
Suffice to say he wasn't faithful and did his own thing

With my sister and I , he rarely missed an event we were in.
My mom did all the typical holiday stuff and we went to the grandparents for Thanksgiving and Christmas.
I literally went over the river and thru the woods to Grandma's house for Christmas dinner as a boy.

My mom was very instrumental in my views that marriage doesn't need to be for your life.
After 20+ yrs of my Dad's running around, she'd had enough.
She later met a more faithful man , who gave her many wonderful years before he passed.

Imagine all the memories you could have given to your own kid(s) then?  Your upbringing sounds 1000% better than mine, so why wouldn't you want to pass that sort of thing on?  (serious respectful question in the midst of all this profanity LOL)

[Kahn.N.Singh]

Getting thru USMC boot camp doesn't require any special talent.
It DOES demand a lot of mental endurance and a refusal to quit.

Indeed, also exhibited by 85 percent of all recruits. Awesome!

[Dave D]

My mom was very instrumental in my views that marriage doesn't need to be for your life.
After 20+ yrs of my Dad's running around, she'd had enough.
She later met a more faithful man , who gave her many wonderful years before he passed.

Howard your whole life has been about finding a partner, you've been divorced 3 times and you're married now. This indicates you believe in being married as a way of life. You may not believe in long term matrimony and you mother probably shaped that view.
You seem very confused.

Indeed, also exhibited by 85 percent of all recruits. Awesome!

Lol

[OLKE_TEXAS]

My younger step brother is 5 yrs younger then me.
He was out of high school and considering the military.

I had just been discharged from my 4 yr tour of USMC active duty .
I was home visiting family, when I saw him.

He was going to join the USMC and assumed I'd approve.
I pulled him aside and told him :

" There are better ways to serve your country and be part of the military.
God love ya for wanting to serve, but the marines aren't the best career option.
Yeah, I'm proud I survived boot camp on Parris Island. But , overall, I wish
I'd have chosen a different branch and military experience.

If I was in your shoes, I'd join the Navy or Coast Guard."

He joined the Navy and had a 20 yr career.
At my mom's funeral, he reminded me of that conversation.
We had a good laugh and he smiled back saying;
" Thanks to you I dodged a bullet"

Is years of navy service enough to retire?

[Zillotch]

I was dumb

cant say the guys never been honest on this forum.

[Zillotch]

THIS is how much of a retarded get bigger I was.

sigh.... i cant bust ur chops no more. good bye.

[Zillotch]

Trust me, after 8 failed marriages and Marine Boot Camp, there is NOTHING that will phase me from get big posts 

its not u, its me. I actually feel sorry 4 u... which pisses me off, lol.

[Kwon]

THIS is how much of a retarded get bigger I was.

It was 1979 and I was in college .
The US Embassy in Iran had been over run with terrorist and they held hostages.
I dropped out of college and joined the Marines.

I was all set to join the Air Force , when I decided to talk with the USMC recruiter.
He told me ; " Look now, you did good on the ASVAB test and qualify for any job. But in his man's marine corps,
if the shit hits the fan, EVERY marine picks up a  rifle and joins the fight"

I thought ; " Oh Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"    Yup, I was a real get-bigger back then.

Oh yeah, I was young, dumb and full of cum hahahahaha.

I took my son to get a new tank top. His side muscles are getting so big that he is popping out of his wife beater at school, and it is causing a problem because the ladys are distracted, they can't keep their eyes off of him.

So we are in line at Walmart today, and this guy bumps into my achillies tendon with his shopping cart. I turned around and this s.o.b. is laughing at me. Not even a sorry. I told him to go back to Mexico and go pick some peppers. He got mad and called me a hillbilly. I was going to touch him with my jab, but the shopping cart was shielding him from my line of fire, so I picked up a bag of Skittles and launched it at his face.

He got out of the way, and the Skittles bounced off of this little girl's head. She started crying, and next thing I knew, this big black guy hits me over the head with a shovel. My son began to swing on him, and I got up and tackled the guy. I pulled down his pants and shoved a bag of skittles in his ass. Then I hit him in the cock with a pot of flowers.

The mexican guy thought it was pretty funny, so I threw him inside of his shopping cart and pushed him into a cactus. I didn't even pay for the shirt. My son and I just headed for the door. This old white guy at the door who only had one arm tried to stop us. My son shook his hand and I touched him with the jab. He went down before I could even throw the right.

As I was getting into the truck, this cop tried to put me in hand cuffs. I spun around twice and hit him with the deadly uppercut. My fourteen year old son started the pickup, so I jumped in the back and we sped home. It was a close one, but at least my son got a bigger shirt.

[The Abdominal Snoman]

My younger step brother is 5 yrs younger then me.
He was out of high school and considering the military.

I had just been discharged from my 4 yr tour of USMC active duty .
I was home visiting family, when I saw him.

He was going to join the USMC and assumed I'd approve.
I pulled him aside and told him :

" There are better ways to serve your country and be part of the military.
God love ya for wanting to serve, but the marines aren't the best career option.
Yeah, I'm proud I survived boot camp on Parris Island. But , overall, I wish
I'd have chosen a different branch and military experience.

If I was in your shoes, I'd join the Navy or Coast Guard."

He joined the Navy and had a 20 yr career.
At my mom's funeral, he reminded me of that conversation.
We had a good laugh and he smiled back saying;
" Thanks to you I dodged a bullet"

Most of the military guys on the show Naked and Afraid end up being pussies and the chicks outlast them...

[Taffin]

My childhood was pretty good compared to most.

Ok, so why didn't I have kids and pass on the experiences? *I'll take this serious for once and give you a real reply.*

Starting in high school , I noticed how other kids parents lived and related to each other.
Most kids parents seemed like good people. But they didn't look like happy, fulfilled , loving couples.
I ran track with one guy, who's dad I call "Ed", to illustrate my point.

Ed married his HS/college sweetheart, and got a basic degree in business from a  state university.
He sold insurance for All State , had 3 kids , chain smoked and looked older then his years.
Ed had a "Lewis Black"  angry humor and we stopped by to bull shit with him on weekends.

Ed always reminded us to enjoy life NOW because it would suck later.
He had a funny yet candid  manner of telling self-deprecating stories on his sexless marriage , endless bills, etc.
What struck me was Ed's belief that his miserable adult fate was "INEVITABLE".
The belief that your life's path was inevitable, really bugged me.
I didn't know how I'd turn out, but I vowed NOT to end up like Ed.

Growing up in the 1960's and 70's I also saw a lot of "hippy types".
The kind that wants to live free in a van, without a job or stable income.
This looked worse then Ed's miserable existence. A least Ed had a real job ,supported himself and his family.
The hippy types looked like free loading deadbeats to me. I sure as fuk, didn't want to be like those bums.

For me the goal was to get educated and get into a stable career /profession.
I enjoyed being in a relationship with the right girl, so marriage appealed to me.
Having kids however, looked like a lifestyle with endless hours of stress ,truncated with a few minutes of joy.
To me, the ideal situation was to have : decent job, car, home, married to a great wife , but no kids.

Unlike those who cherished raising children, I viewed parenting as endless work, money and stress.
I'm mindful this is a  deeply personal issue and most won't agree with me.
LOL, if everyone thought like me , the world's population would shrink and we'd go extinct  

Conclusion: I ended up living most of my life by own values and ethics.
The side trip in the USMC for 4 years wasn't smart  , but, it helped mature and humble me.

Most of the under age 30 get-biggers would find my current lifestyle rather dull and boring.
30-40+ years ago, I'd make fun of my own current , slow paced" lifestyle.

Take care and feel free to ask any more ??, on this , or any other issue.

Thanks for replying, I only just realised.  The only thing I'd point out is that the kids/effort thing isn't actually endless.  It's harder at the start, sure, but it gets easier as they grow up (if you do it right, anyone ending up with a mouthy kid deserves it)  e.g. they'd be grown by now and you could still have your 'boring' llifestyle.  As for the money they cost, just earn more....   

[wes]

Quite the exhilerating adrenalin rush of a thread!

[Zillotch]

Ok, on a serious note, money/cost is far from the main issue with raising kids.
From my wife and I's observations , it's the constant demand of your time from the lil' bastards.

My old HS buddy summed it up best with ; " Kids suck the life out of you."

all u have to say is that you're selfish, and cant be fuked with to make a positive contribution to humanity.

[Taffin]

Quite the exhilerating adrenalin rush of a thread!

It's your fault for inventing parenthood!  While we're on the subject, how are Cain and Abel getting along?  (And give Eve a kiss from me and tell her all is forgiven).... 

[Taffin]

Ok, on a serious note, money/cost is far from the main issue with raising kids.
From my wife and I's observations , it's the constant demand of your time from the lil' bastards.

My old HS buddy summed it up best with ; " Kids suck the life out of you."

Plus, for many parents it never seems to end.
Just when your kids grow up, they get married and bring grand kids by.
Then, they expect you to "baby sit" while they go off for a weekend vacation .
When you finally become old, frail and elderly, they stick you in an old folks home.

Your kids come by on holidays , wishing you well, waiting for you to croak.
THEN, they bury you and fight over the inheritance .

Not doubting what you've been told by friends but I just don't recognise this experience.  I do only what I want with mine - they don't get to 'demand' anything as - newsflash: I'm in charge....

And remember you were your parent's child too - did they let you "suck the life out of them?"  And when you visited on holidays were you wishing they would croak so you could get your inheritance?

Is it just possible that some kids are great fun and love you so wish you the best...?