Am I selfish

[JCL]

Antoine Vaillant used to say that the pump is the cure for everything. He might have a good point..

He still is saying it!

[wes]

Antoine Vaillant used to say that the pump is the cure for everything. He might have a good point..

DAMN RIGHT MY BROTHER IN IRON!!   

[Explorerspl]

She runs her own business as well, but right now is taking leave to take care of our son. So she provides as well.

She just feels we arent spending time together and i should put the gym thing on the back burner.

Ill figure it out. Im going to give the morning thing a try.

I don't know man the whole thing just seems foreign to me compared to my relationship situation.

I'm working on average 10-12 a day every day and if I only have 2 free hours and it's a gym day, my wife is making sure I end up there and will pin my glutes after otherwise I will skip and miss my pin.

Any goals I have she supports 100% regardless of what it takes from her, completely selfless. Getting with her has turned my life around completely for the better, so when I see these posts I just wonder why grown men put up with this shit lol

But to each their own

[ratherbebig]

so you play hockey twice a week and then you wanna hit the gym at least a couple of times per week as well i assume

might wanna throw in a few bowling nights, some dart and a few nights drinking with the guys there as well.

[JCL]

so you play hockey twice a week and then you wanna hit the gym at least a couple of times per week as well i assume

might wanna throw in a few bowling nights, some dart and a few nights drinking with the guys there as well.

haha cant get enough of that bowling!

[OLKE_TEXAS]

No she doesnt understand, and a lot of people dont.  

The gym for me like im sure a lot of you is a place of sanctuary.  I feel better about myself, I relief stress, I can get away, I can refocus. etc etc etc

She doesnt get it. Especially right now with me not trianing in months, and my business not doing the greatest i need a recharge and like always throughout the years, getting back into the gym and on a regimen has allowed me to refocus and find some internal motivation and vision.

Instead, I get home and it turns into a blow up, and i lose my temper and i look like the bad guy.

I hate fighting, and negative shit, but i also hate being told what to do and not living my life. Welcome to marriage i suppose.

Dude you are escaping the situation. When you have kids " me time " is over. You should have realised this before having kids. Accept your faith its the only way to survive. " me time " will be back in a couple of years. Except if you have more kids like me (3) or 6 like (taffin) then it will never return.

[DroppingPlates]

He still is saying it!

Show her an Antoine video, that might end the gym debate

[JCL]

I don't know man the whole thing just seems foreign to me compared to my relationship situation.

I'm working on average 10-12 a day every day and if I only have 2 free hours and it's a gym day, my wife is making sure I end up there and will pin my glutes after otherwise I will skip and miss my pin.

Any goals I have she supports 100% regardless of what it takes from her, completely selfless. Getting with her has turned my life around completely for the better, so when I see these posts I just wonder why grown men put up with this shit lol

But to each their own

I agree and I use to think this way, but have been conformed to the phrase "happy wife, happy life".  It wasnt always this way, but as Im sure you've heard, it happens slowly overtime.  

When I put my foot down it causes strife and i refuse to talk to her....marriage, its a beautiful thing.

[wes]

Show her an Antoine video, that might end the gym debate

BINGO

/end thread/

[OLKE_TEXAS]

I'm sure she feels the need to get out once in a while as well. You're at work for 11hrs a day and she's taking care of the baby probably for longer. You guys need to somehow create a schedule that works for both you. Maybe she can get out for awhile before or after you go to work? There is also going to be a time where you two will also need a night out away from everything. What about a family member coming in and watching the kid for a few hours a week...like a grandparent?

This is the best post ever posted by coach. Listen to this man.
Balance it out with your partner zo see can also have free time.

[JCL]

Dude you are escaping the situation. When you have kids " me time " is over. You should have realised this before having kids. Accept your faith its the only way to survive. " me time " will be back in a couple of years. Except if you have more kids like me (3) or 6 like (taffin) then it will never return.

Haha, theres truth in all of this I respect it.

Ill figure out a way to bring back my glorious physique!

[JCL]

Show her an Antoine video, that might end the gym debate

haha....if only it were that easy. "But hun, Antoine said so"

[OLKE_TEXAS]

Haha, theres truth in all of this I respect it.

Ill figure out a way to bring back my glorious physique!

Lol I painted a to grim picture. Read the coach'es advice. He is spot on. Follow his advice and all will work out just fine.

[JCL]

Lol I painted a to grim picture. Read the coach'es advice. He is spot on. Follow his advice and all will work out just fine.

Cheers

[OLKE_TEXAS]

Training should come before everything.

NO LIMITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111111

How did that work out for you bro ?? 

[_aj_]

Likely, she feels out of shape and like she looks like shit and the last thing she wants is you getting back into shape. Fucking women HATE that more than anything. Unless she gets her shit in order, she's gonna be on your ass like a harpie every time you try to get back into it. Be warned.

[DroppingPlates]

Dude you are escaping the situation. When you have kids " me time " is over. You should have realised this before having kids. Accept your faith its the only way to survive. " me time " will be back in a couple of years. Except if you have more kids like me (3) or 6 like (taffin) then it will never return.

Man that's pathetic. I understand that children drastically change your life, but I believe that one can only be happy & healthy on the long run when there's a good balance between family, work and time to reload your battery. I see too many stressed and unhappy parents around me who are out of shape.

[Primemuscle]

So I just had a newborn (our first) and i work and run my own business from 10-9pm everyday!

I stopped training and eating good for the past few months due to work and other reasons, now I'm finding some motivation to get back at it.  Last night i got home at 930pm and had a blow up fight about me going to the gym, and i should be there for my 4 week old son.  Hes feeding and sleeping, i just wanted to slip out and get a workout in and try to undue some stress.

Your thoughts?

Everyone does better with some personal time off. Provide your partner with some relief and she should do the same for you.

[ratherbebig]

yes youre selfish.

you had a kid less than a month ago, im pretty sure you wont transform into a blob just because you dont hit the gym and you can probably skip the hockey as well.

to even cause stress and having heated arguments about it is a sign of selfishness and immaturity and lack of understanding of your wives needs.

[Grape Ape]

Level setting expectations is key.

If you get in the mindset that the first 5-6 months are going to be full out baby mode, it's easier to cope when you miss out on stuff.   Get yourself around the fact that it's all about the baby and the mother for that time.  Get your push ups , sit ups or running in while you can, but don't expect miracles.   Sleep depravity and overall new stresses you're not used to will make tempers short.

After that time, things will normalize a bit, and you'll get back to going to the gym.

[JCL]

yes youre selfish.

you had a kid less than a month ago, im pretty sure you wont transform into a blob just because you dont hit the gym and you can probably skip the hockey as well.

to even cause stress and having heated arguments about it is a sign of selfishness and immaturity and lack of understanding of your wives needs.

I think you're incorrect but i respect your view.  It's a lot more complex then just that.

Life is short, people need to do things for themselves too.

[JCL]

Level setting expectations is key.

If you get in the mindset that the first 5-6 months are going to be full out baby mode, it's easier to cope when you miss out on stuff.   Get yourself around the fact that it's all about the baby and the mother for that time.  Get your push ups , sit ups or running in while you can, but don't expect miracles.   Sleep depravity and overall new stresses you're not used to will make tempers short.

After that time, things will normalize a bit, and you'll get back to going to the gym.

Thanks dude.

[OLKE_TEXAS]

Man that's pathetic. I understand that children drastically change your life, but I believe that one can only be happy & healthy on the long run when there's a good balance between family, work and time to reload your battery. I see too many stressed and unhappy parents around me who are out of shape.

You are right sir. All is well and more balanced now. The wife was sick all true 2016. It was a rough year.

[ratherbebig]

I think you're incorrect but i respect your view.  It's a lot more complex then just that.

Life is short, people need to do things for themselves too.

yes your wife need to be away playing hockey too a few times a week...

[ChevChelios]

I don't know man the whole thing just seems foreign to me compared to my relationship situation.

I'm working on average 10-12 a day every day and if I only have 2 free hours and it's a gym day, my wife is making sure I end up there and will pin my glutes after otherwise I will skip and miss my pin.

Any goals I have she supports 100% regardless of what it takes from her, completely selfless. Getting with her has turned my life around completely for the better, so when I see these posts I just wonder why grown men put up with this shit lol

But to each their own

This is a normal situation, each partner stands for the other one.

To the OP,wtf,you work 10-12 hours so you deserve your moments of reward. Working out would make you feel better and even earn better money,make your wife understand that,she doesn't need an always-pissed husband or depressed one,she needs a calm and happy husband to tolerate her shit and the kid's shit.

Also,she says she preffers you being fatter,that is absolute bullshit and nothing but a lie. My ex-wife managed to fuck my life,she also said the same thing and i was actually stupid enough to quit gym for her. After 4 years we divorced because we couldn't do it right ,last months she would always say i look like shit(which i actually do now according to getbig standards) . Popped some trenballonie and back to gym,never quit what you like/love for a woman, she loves you she will not try to change you .Period.