I hate these but anyways
1-Uncle Joon- All his gimmicks turn on him and virtually cave his giant nose into his brain
2-Dj 181, I would say overdose of steroids but those are probably bunk. No I feel he will meet his demise while having one too many narcissistic rages in front of the wrong chickie who will proceed to beat him to death with a pack of twinkies. He did finally get his arms up to 14 and 1/2 inches and his quads up to 12 inches from 8 so he did die knowing he accomplished something6-
3-Shizzo. Suicide after getting perma banned from every bodybuilding website out there. Oh and also from an overdose of alcohol and pecker nectar. His dying words were rumoured to be, "all these sailors, gimmicks, every last one of them"
4-Matt C-While having a sleepover with all 22 of his baby mommas he accidentaly gets smothered by a couple of the fat ones in his sleep. Sadly he had just got an article with md approved for publication entitled Vince Goodrums Pumps his Guns Instead Of Some Cheating Husband's Ass. Luckily Matt had cashed out his crypto currency and was esitmated to be worth $1 Billion dollars at death making him only the second richest getbigger in history behind Suck My Muscle. This ensures Matt'c Children Matt, Matilda, Matt, Matt Matilda, Matt, Matilda, Matilda, Matt, Matilda, Matilda, Vince, Matt, Matilda, Matt, Matt, Ron, plus the 4 sets of twins not yet born until later this year are ensured a long and prosperous life in Thunder Bay
5-Vince Goodrum- While giving yet another one of South Carloina's Infamous cheating husbands the 8 inch kielbasa in walks the man's very irate 400lbs wife who screams "Homewrecker!!!" while brandishing a machete. Unfortunately Vince's Box Cutters and Small spray bottle of bleach are not in the corduroy jeans around his ankle, but in the pocket of his 8 Ball Leather jacket which he left on the coat rack by the front door. There is a court battle going on currently between ex husband and getbig hall of famer Vissy and Vince's Cousin Shawn over whom gets the Caliber Fitness Empire and more improtantly his $100 Youtube Royalty check
6-EsFitness- You might think he will go out in a blaze of glory but you would be wrong. EsFitness after years of being an outlaw, too much smack, crack, wacky tobac, and Cognac, along with bad spider bites, tons of gear, not taking any disrespect and 5 coca colas each at breakfast lunch and dinner decides to go 100% Home Grown organic fruits vegtables, free range eggs, grass fed beeef and dairy. His body rejects all these healthy foreign products and it rebels against him and he croaks after injesting 3 free range eggs cook in 100% organic Coconut Oil.
After news of his passing hit the world, all the prisons, sherrif's departments, celebrities he trained and the state of mexico itself all hang their respective flags at half mass. Rumour has it Linda wants Es Buried beside Bruce in Seattle
7-Vince Basile---Well Fitness Frenzy tells it so well
that my friends are my predictions for 2018
Never smoked crack and generally I'm not a fan of stimulants aside from coffee and energy drinks such as Rockstar (grape is tasty, as is the orange "recovery" flavor) or NOS (original), whichever is on sale. Don't even drink pre-workouts anymore.
Also have never been a fan of weed, despite having access to all the weed i would want. (dated, or was sleeping with the lady who supplied about 80% of the dispensaries in the Coachella Valley at the time. She is since gotten out of the business and moved on to other things... and recently was dating or sleeping with a lady who owns business as a cultivator who is company won first place at the Cannabis Cup with one of their strains and produces close to a dozen other top shelf strains in the 26 to 29% THC range of various hybrids sativas and indicas. Also work security for cultivators at grow houses on-site as well as delivery and transport of product and cash in addition to tactical weapons training/RBSD for herself, her family and employees.)
Also not a fan of cognac. When I drank, it was vodka at home or bourbon ( Maker's Mark) in social settings( in Mexico in 2014 or 2015 I did develop a taste for pina coladas during the day at the beach. Had never had a pina colada up until that point and I found them to be absolutely fucking delicious LOL); or white wines such as Chardonnay or Pinot Noir at home or Cabernet Sauvignon or port in Social settings/dinners.
I also don't care for grass-fed beef. Don't care how trendy or expensive it is, and I want the cows I eat or the milk they produce to contain as many hormones and antibiotics as possible.
*& I have had spider bites, this being the desert, every summer there is a nice supply of black widows that seem to Kongregate outside around my air conditioning unit & provide plenty opportunity for some impressive pictures of black widows with bodies the size of nickels to post on Facebook.
