Like many bottoms, my gay friend George has a harrowing story about using an enema before anal sex.
"I had met a guy on Grindr," he said. "I get to his place and ring the doorbell. As he opens the door to say hi, I coughed and shat out a load of poo water into my underwear. Loudly. I had to run into his flat, straight to the toilet, and throw my underwear away. It was all down my legs. It killed the mood, needless to say. And, yes, I left the dirty underwear there."
Among bottoms, learning the art and science of douching—using an enema, syringe or hose to flush out the rectal cavity before getting rammed to high heaven—is a sacred rite of passage. Like the asses they irrigate, douches come in all shapes and sizes, from readily available Fleet brand saline bottles to complicated shower contraptions for seasoned vets. It's a messy reality of taking dick up your butt: If you don't want to end up with a disappointed top and a gross sex situation on your hands, a courteous bottom needs to douche beforehand. Or so many within the gay community think.
In the interest of all my dirty bottoms out there, I asked a few doctors what one should do to prevent horror stories like George's. What's really the best way to douche? The answer surprised me—according to medical experts, you probably shouldn't be doing it at all.
"I usually tell patients to just put a towel down on those fancy sheets and go for it," said Dr. Stephen Goldstone, an assistant clinical professor of surgery at Mount Sinai Hospital and a specialist in anorectal disease and gay men's health. Goldstone is the author of The Ins & Outs of Gay Sex: A Medical Handbook, so he knows a thing or two.
Dr. Evan Goldstein, who founded the gay men's sexual wellness practice Bespoke Surgical (and is one of the country's foremost anal rejuvenators), provided a helpful hypothetical. "Imagine if you line up ten guys and you're going to top them all," he said, describing a modest Thursday evening at The Eagle. "Even if they haven't prepared, nine out of ten would be completely stool-free."
