I had a few dumbbells and a decent barbell set at 20 years old, broke as hell.
You are sitting on a fat pension and oodles of money and you are telling me you don't have some weights stocked away some place in your garage or storage??
Plus it's almost April and you live in Oregon. All those beautiful trees and scenery. Go outside and enjoy nature.
I saw your recently photos in a tank top. You looked damn good. That nice physique is still going to be there when all this boils over.
Fat pension and oodles of money? I wish.

Like you, I had a make shift setup with enough equipment to do some basic exercises in my 20's and 30's. Our house had a basement with a 7' ceiling which was not idea, but it was dry and warm. I could and did occasionally on the floor with out worry of breaking anything. Learned early on never to put collars on the barbell so I could dump the weight should I be unable to lift it. Did that once when my wife was home. The noise of the plates hitting the cement floor freaked her out. If I'd choked to death, I am pretty sure she'd have freaked out even more....or maybe not.

Currently, I have a few dumbbells and a power twister spring bar, that can really cause one some pain or break something if you lose your grip (which I have on occasion). I'm looking into getting some serious exercise bands which take up no room and should be fairly effective. There's always the old bodyweight standbys push ups, sit-up and squats. I'll probably be doing all of these in short order because Governor Brown is talking about further restrictions regarding being in public and social distancing.
Thanks for the compliment. I should have a fair to middling physique after a lifetime of working out and trying to live as healthy as possible. Almost anyone can do this.