Critique review condition and size at 43

[IroNat]

To be clear aint no one fighting me. Its just outrageous no one is even rude to me like that in real life but online everyone is a tough guy online. I swear I could wear a tutu in public and no one would say shit but everyone on here wants to talk shit because my pants are low. But I know damn well I could walk by them in a purple banana smuggling thing and they wouldn't say shit in real life.

Because they would think you are a mental case or drug addict.

Think about it next time you put on your bunny suit.

[wes]

Hey Hanky I have no fear of your punk ass at all.

Your bullshit tough guy act doesn`t faze me.

[Kwon]

Hey Hanky I have no fear of your punk ass at all.

Your bullshit tough guy act doesn`t faze me.

I'm much older than HankyPanky

[wes]

I'm much older than HankyPanky

Me too but I don`t care.....I`m better than he is as a human being and so are you.

[Soul Crusher]

Welcome to the community, 'bhank'. What we lack in sheer numbers, we more than make up for in generosity, kindness and a shared passion for fitness! I'm sure you'll enjoy it here. As you've asked for critiques, I owe you my honesty and will grant your request. I'll try to be gentle!

I'm going to guess that the 'b' in your screenname stands for 'bald', as the shame that comes from wearing that stupid baseball cap could only be eclipsed by the shame that comes from being a follically-challenged faget.

Furthermore, your deltoids betray a lifetime of bad decisions, and the irony of your shitty Superman tattoo is that it is borne on the body of a man who's no doubt spent most of his life intoxicated and incompetent. This is further evidenced by your 'medicated' look and droopy, tired eyes.

At age 43, the years haven't been kind to you, and you appear decades older. Part of this could be attributable to your crappy diet; however, your burgeoning addiction to opioid painkillers after your recent injury isn't helping. What is it? Percocets? Vicodin? This desire to dampen your emotional pain that arose from a sub-optimum physique has only exacerbated the issue, and it won't be long until the rest of you follows your lats and decides to wither away.

Nearly two years later . . . . . .

[IroNat]

Nearly two years later . . . . . .

Phantom Spunker extended the "Olive Branch of Getbig Goodwill" and Bhanky slapped it down.

[Gym Rat]

To be clear aint no one fighting me. Its just outrageous no one is even rude to me like that in real life but online everyone is a tough guy online. I swear I could wear a tutu in public and no one would say shit but everyone on here wants to talk shit because my pants are low. But I know damn well I could walk by them in a purple banana smuggling thing and they wouldn't say shit in real life.

Clegg has entered the chat...

[Taffin]

Nearly two years later . . . . . .

[Gym Rat]

I just got my "Critique" kit in the mail today.

Hat for baldness - check
selfie-ring - check
HGH, Test, Tren, Adrol - check
Dick root pants - check
mirrors for constant self-love - check

This guy 

[wazhazbin]

not a fair comparison, in the first pic he hadn't touched a weight in six weeks.  that's why he looks better now......

wait, what?

[wes]

Moe, Larry, Curly

[joswift]

middle age spread......

[Taffin]

Moe, Larry, Curly

 

[IroNat]

Hard to believe those are all the same person.

He looks just like Elton John in the second to last pic.

[Taffin]

Hard to believe those are all the same person.

He looks just like Elton John in the second to last pic.

Yeah, he didn't like that when I first posted it - but I've been away for a while, so watch out for reposts! 

[ThisisOverload]

middle age spread......

He's aged 10 years easily.

[wes]

Fucking hilarious !  LOL 

[illuminati]

middle age spread......

And muscle Atrophying

[IroNat]

Scooter is my favorite.

[Rambone]

“Almost Mensa Member Believes Magic Scale Can Measure Metabolism”

Reads like an Onion article title

[Rambone]

Welcome to the community, 'bhank'. What we lack in sheer numbers, we more than make up for in generosity, kindness and a shared passion for fitness! I'm sure you'll enjoy it here. As you've asked for critiques, I owe you my honesty and will grant your request. I'll try to be gentle!

I'm going to guess that the 'b' in your screenname stands for 'bald', as the shame that comes from wearing that stupid baseball cap could only be eclipsed by the shame that comes from being a follically-challenged faget.

Furthermore, your deltoids betray a lifetime of bad decisions, and the irony of your shitty Superman tattoo is that it is borne on the body of a man who's no doubt spent most of his life intoxicated and incompetent. This is further evidenced by your 'medicated' look and droopy, tired eyes.

At age 43, the years haven't been kind to you, and you appear decades older. Part of this could be attributable to your crappy diet; however, your burgeoning addiction to opioid painkillers after your recent injury isn't helping. What is it? Percocets? Vicodin? This desire to dampen your emotional pain that arose from a sub-optimum physique has only exacerbated the issue, and it won't be long until the rest of you follows your lats and decides to wither away.

Jesus Christ. This made me laugh until I cried

[bhank]

“Almost Mensa Member Believes Magic Scale Can Measure Metabolism”

Reads like an Onion article title

It’s really not that complicated the scale takes your weight you input your height it can the. Determine your water composition by the time it takes an electrical current to travel from one foot to the other. Fat and muscle have different percent water based on your height and your water percentage  it can determine your body fat using a simple regression analysis. It’s going to make some assumptions on the weight of your bones based on your height and sex but again normal statistics.  At that point it’s a rather simple calculation to determine how many calories x pounds of muscle uses in a day at rest. That is your bmr now of course it is issuing statistics and standard bell curve distributions and standard deviations  on its regression models but it’s a pretty good estimate. Now if your heart rate is 200bpm and you fall outside a normal standard deviation distribution no the scale is not going to take that into account and adjust. But the statistics behind it are actually pretty simple 

[Gym Rat]

Every person Ive ever met who talk about how tough they are, are anything but.
Gassed after 2-rounds and having to quit = "not tough".
Pounding Cleggs head for 2-rounds leaving no signs of wear = "not tough".
Losing a fight from being gassed after 2 = "not tough".

I myself am not "tough", but yeah, folks like BHanks are not scary, they are comical...

[bhank]

Every person Ive ever met who talk about how tough they are, are anything but.
Gassed after 2-rounds and having to quit = "not tough".
Pounding Cleggs head for 2-rounds leaving no signs of wear = "not tough".
Losing a fight from being gassed after 2 = "not tough".

I myself am not "tough", but yeah, folks like BHanks are not scary, they are comical...

Say whatever you want online I am the real deal no one is actually going to fuck with me in real life you guys can say whatever you want call me a weirdo whatever but I give people uneasy vibes from across a room it’s different. Scary people get uneasy around me. I have sat next to killer reading of fear it’s like they know

[wes]

Say whatever you want online I am the real deal no one is actually going to fuck with me in real life you guys can say whatever you want call me a weirdo whatever but I give people uneasy vibes from across a room it’s different. Scary people get uneasy around me. I have sat next to killer reading of fear it’s like they know

I`d slap the shit out of you if you ever stepped to me chump.....I couldn`t care less how young or big you are....I`m from somewhere that you would have never have lasted a week in tough guy.

I really have hung around killers.....true story.....unlike your made up BS.