The Sad Hankins VS The Chad Canning ❌ Assaults Old Men in the Street ✔️ Respects His Elders, Seeks Their Opinion
❌ Benches #245 on Half a Gram + of Steroids ✔️ Benches Big Numbers on 1/3 an Anadrol Tab
❌ Bleeds from Ass Occasionally ✔️ Shoots 8-10 Semen Lassos Per Session
❌ Bald as a Cue Ball ✔️ Almost Too Much Hair
❌ Beat Up By Baby Momma ✔️ Too Busy Dropping Loads to Fight Baby
Mommas
❌ 0-3 in MMA, Tore Pec in unsanctioned MMA with Baby Mama ✔️ Makes People Nervous with His Vibes
❌ Advanced Degree, Still Dumb as a Post ✔️ Autism Makes Him Annoyingly Intellectual
❌ Has to Find The Right Underwear to Pose In ✔️ Shops at Walmart, Doesn't Care About
Fashion, Just Strength and Health
❌ Nervous About Nipples Like a Woman ✔️ Nervous About World Events Like A Man
❌ Thin As a Pin Naturally, Needs 10 Meals a Day ✔️ Hardly Eats, Still Grows
❌ Spazzes Out When People Think He's Gay ✔️ Hates The Gays, But Is Still Man Enough
To Admire a Nice Piece