Severely Depressed For The Last Month

[wes]

No training or interest in training,eating very little, and it`s usually shit,feel like leaving my wife,have felt suicidal,and felt like drinking......I never feel like drinking or getting high.


Not looking for sympathy for the pricks here that always say that.....I have explained to Josh how I feel  cuz I know he can relate.

Long story, but I cannot remember a time since I was about 12-13 where I haven`t been depressed......this is why I self medicated for so many decades,just trying to escape this severe depression.

Fast forward to these times now (today),and my anxiety has taken precedence over my depression....ie, I am always somewhat depressed but I have learned how to deal with it by staying busy.....training, and competing has always helped in this regard,but now my depression has once  again reared its ugly head......I know it will pass but this has been a fucking monster.

At any rate no matter how I feel it`s back to the gym on Monday (seriously couldn`t be bothered to to start earlier and I like a new beginning and Monday seems to work for me ),and I`m gonna` diet like a pre-contest but eat larger portions and add in cardio..........anything to stay busy and occupied.

I have a shitload of bio-identical supps for my contest,so on Monday if I don`t post in the training section it means I`ve hung myself in my barn. 

Sorry for the Matt C. like rant but had to vent and it seemed the thing to do with my getbig family.

I am like The Phoenix so I don`t go out like a punkass bitch but this sux.

[deadz]

Push past it best you can. Time is limited for all of us, keep pushing!

[wes]

Push past it best you can. Time is limited for all of us, keep pushing!

I will my friend......Monday I will train 4 days a week combining bodyparts and then back to 6 days once the soreness subsides.

I hate to sound like a bitch but I feel fucked!!

[njflex]

weather is getting better go away for some sun for a weekend with wife,sit in sun /relax/..beach or a place with pool.

[BigRo]

Hi Wes,

Have you considered TRT?

[wes]

weather is getting better go away for some sun for a weekend with wife,sit in sun /relax/..beach or a place with pool.

Good advice Steve.....thanks buddy.

This ain`t my first rodeo been dealing with it forever but it`s a bad bout for sure!

[wes]

Hi Wes,

Have you considered TRT?

Ro,right now I`m doing 200 mgs. of Test 400 and just threw in a bit of D-Bol.

I`ll be OK,it`s just a bitch waiting for it to pass.

Thanks Ro,and congrats again on your show,you will turn pro soon brother ! 

[beakdoctor]

Sorry to hear Bud.  Hang in there. It'll get better. Depression is like wearing blinders. It's better than you think, you just can't see it right now.

Things that have worked for me:

Sunlight, unplugging tv/computer/smartphone and reading a book, listening to music (with really good quality headphones) and hitting the gym. If you have access to a pool swimming for some reason always makes me feel better- I think just large bodies of water in general are good- something about the motion of the water charging the ions? An old hippie told me that once but it seems to work for me.

[wes]

Sorry to hear Bud.  Hang in there. It'll get better. Depression is like wearing blinders. It's better than you think, you just can't see it right now.

Things that have worked for me:

Sunlight, unplugging tv/computer/smartphone and reading a book, listening to music (with really good quality headphones) and hitting the gym. If you have access to a pool swimming for some reason always makes me feel better- I think just large bodies of water in general are good- something about the motion of the water charging the ions? An old hippie told me that once but it seems to work for me.

Thanks doc,I know I`ll be good it`s just a bitch at the moment.

I appreciate the kind words and advice but like I said I just wanted to vent to  people that I consider friends whether they be online or not.

Much appreciated and I`ll be hitting the gym on Monday,the gym has always been my sanctuarary.

No need to comment further unless you feel like telling me to fuck off and put on my big boy pants!   

[Kwon]

No training or interest in training,eating very little, and it`s usually shit,feel like leaving my wife,have felt suicidal,and felt like drinking......I never feel like drinking or getting high.


Not looking for sympathy for the pricks here that always say that.....I have explained to Josh how I feel  cuz I know he can relate.

Long story, but I cannot remember a time since I was about 12-13 where I haven`t been depressed......this is why I self medicated for so many decades,just trying to escape this severe depression.

Fast forward to these times now (today),and my anxiety has taken precedence over my depression....ie, I am always somewhat depressed but I have learned how to deal with it by staying busy.....training, and competing has always helped in this regard,but now my depression has once  again reared its ugly head......I know it will pass but this has been a fucking monster.

At any rate no matter how I feel it`s back to the gym on Monday (seriously couldn`t be bothered to to start earlier and I like a new beginning and Monday seems to work for me ),and I`m gonna` diet like a pre-contest but eat larger portions and add in cardio..........anything to stay busy and occupied.

I have a shitload of bio-identical supps for my contest,so on Monday if I don`t post in the training section it means I`ve hung myself in my barn. 

Sorry for the Matt C. like rant but had to vent and it seemed the thing to do with my getbig family.

I am like The Phoenix so I don`t go out like a punkass bitch but this sux.

Do you feel stuck in your marriage?

Do you not love her anymore?

Is the relationship not exciting anymore?

Is nothing in life exciting anymore?

[wes]

Do you feel stuck in your marriage?

Do you not love her anymore?

Is the relationship not exciting anymore?

Is nothing in life exciting anymore?

No comment!   LOL 

No I love my wife still after 23 years.

[Svengoolie]

There are a lot of younger guys (including myself ) that could benefit from your experience,  knowledge,  and wisdom. For what it's worth, I hope you feel useful and needed.

[joswift]

fucking hell pal
Drop me a PM if you want a chat
I went through 2 years of shit after my spell in hospital, still on meds now

If I can help at all let me know

Good friend of mine took her own life about a month ago, 32 years old
Last conversation I had with her she mentioned the stress of having dog slip leads around the house

Stay strong pal

[wes]

There are a lot of younger guys (including myself ) that could benefit from your experience,  knowledge,  and wisdom. For what it's worth, I hope you feel useful and needed.

Thanks my brother! 

[Gym Rat]

A life-long battle, one you can win my friend!
Stay strong, stay busy, stay sober...

[wes]

fucking hell pal
Drop me a PM if you want a chat
I went through 2 years of shit after my spell in hospital, still on meds now

If I can help at all let me know

Good friend of mine took her own life about a month ago, 32 years old
Last conversation I had with her she mentioned the stress of having dog slip leads around the house

Stay strong pal

Thanks Jeff,you`ve always been a great guy in my book.

I appreciate the concern......I`ll be OK,you just stay focused and win that overall title brother.....I know you will slay the opposition.

My wife is behind me but she doesn`t quite understand depression..........my life has been a bit shitty from an early age but I will prevail,I always have thus far........had a nervous breakdown in Florida in the early 90`s......scariest thing in my entire life.

Thanks again,it means a lot.....don`t know what else to say except I may send a PM if it gets anymore insane than it already is.

[Spike]

i get like that and take big doses of psychedelics

hit the reset button


more than likely it’s something you’re unaware of that’s bothering you - a good insightful trip bella bring that shit to the surface

or you may have a hormone imbalance - TSH maybe or switch from test to a dht like masteron for a bit


the call dmt the business man’s trip cause in 15min you literally come to terms with all that shit that isn’t surface level but bothers the fuck out of you - i do this every 3 months

you can also go it if you take big dabs (concentrate)

hope you feel better wes - had some friends go to the dark side when they got down

[wes]

A life-long battle, one you can win my friend!
Stay strong, stay busy, stay sober...

Thanks brother.....I`ll never take another drink in my life.

I may call Dave Mass this week,talking to him is always cool.

[wes]

i get like that and take big doses of psychedelics

hit the reset button


more than likely it’s something you’re unaware of that’s bothering you - a good insightful trip bella bring that shit to the surface

or you may have a hormone imbalance - TSH maybe or switch from test to a dht like masteron for a bit


the call dmt the business man’s trip cause in 15min you literally come to terms with all that shit that isn’t surface level but bothers the fuck out of you - i do this every 3 months

you can also go it if you take big dabs (concentrate)

hope you feel better wes - had some friends go to the dark side when they got down

Thanks Spike and you hit the nail on the proverbial  head.....I have no clue how or why I feel this way but it has always been like that for me.

I`m the comeback king so I know I can do it again,though this will be my 25,000 comeback! 

Thanks again brother!

[Soul Crusher]

No training or interest in training,eating very little, and it`s usually shit,feel like leaving my wife,have felt suicidal,and felt like drinking......I never feel like drinking or getting high.


Not looking for sympathy for the pricks here that always say that.....I have explained to Josh how I feel  cuz I know he can relate.

Long story, but I cannot remember a time since I was about 12-13 where I haven`t been depressed......this is why I self medicated for so many decades,just trying to escape this severe depression.

Fast forward to these times now (today),and my anxiety has taken precedence over my depression....ie, I am always somewhat depressed but I have learned how to deal with it by staying busy.....training, and competing has always helped in this regard,but now my depression has once  again reared its ugly head......I know it will pass but this has been a fucking monster.

At any rate no matter how I feel it`s back to the gym on Monday (seriously couldn`t be bothered to to start earlier and I like a new beginning and Monday seems to work for me ),and I`m gonna` diet like a pre-contest but eat larger portions and add in cardio..........anything to stay busy and occupied.

I have a shitload of bio-identical supps for my contest,so on Monday if I don`t post in the training section it means I`ve hung myself in my barn. 

Sorry for the Matt C. like rant but had to vent and it seemed the thing to do with my getbig family.

I am like The Phoenix so I don`t go out like a punkass bitch but this sux.

DM if you need to talk it out. 

[wes]

I see my therapist in a few weeks......I have always thrown away the meds as they did shot for me.

Back in the 80`s they had me on a med that made me feel comfortable in my own skin for once.....I was on the highest dosage allowed then they tell me they have to take me off of it as it was damaging peoples liver and had even killed a few people.

Miraculously enough after all the bullshit I did to my body.my liver has no lesions,visible scarring,and my enzymes are fine......that`s insane to me after all the stupid shit I did to get drunk and high......but that was in another life,but I`m a lucky bastard......I know about 125-150 people I "partied" with who are pushing up daisies right now.

[Rascal full]

Sorry to hear this Wes.

You're a legend in my eyes and respected and liked by many. You always have a good word for people and contribute to a wide range of topics, plus you have fantastic knowledge and experience. I hope you know your getbig family appreciates you greatly and most importantly.....you will get through this.

Depression can be a monster but you have slayed this beast before and you can do it again now.

If you ever want to drop me a line you are more than welcome.

[wes]

DM if you need to talk it out. 

Thanks SC,you`re a great guy!!

[Grape Ape]

i get like that and take big doses of psychedelics

hit the reset button


more than likely it’s something you’re unaware of that’s bothering you - a good insightful trip bella bring that shit to the surface

or you may have a hormone imbalance - TSH maybe or switch from test to a dht like masteron for a bit


the call dmt the business man’s trip cause in 15min you literally come to terms with all that shit that isn’t surface level but bothers the fuck out of you - i do this every 3 months

you can also go it if you take big dabs (concentrate)

hope you feel better wes - had some friends go to the dark side when they got down

There's a lot of talk about doing two large dose mushroom trips (25mg?), and wearing blinders and doing an introspective.  Someone's been commissioning a study on this, and has had some good success stories.

Wes, it's good you recognize your symptoms....you'll pull through....heck I don't give a shit about anything here but wanted to see you compete for your pro card, so stay the course.  Get well buddy!

[Grape Ape]

fucking hell pal
Drop me a PM if you want a chat
I went through 2 years of shit after my spell in hospital, still on meds now

If I can help at all let me know

Dude, it's your threats of the ignore list that likely triggered this.