To the tune of "Coward of the County" by the late, great, Kenny Rogers.
Everyone considered him the liar of the forum
He'd never told the truth one time to prove the forum wrong
His mama named him Brian, but folks just called him bhanky
But something always told us, he loved to smoke that dong
He was fully growed all up when his daddy died from shame
No one looked after bhanky, 'cause they knew that he was dumb
I still recall the final words his daddy said to bhanky
"Son, my strife is at last over, but your's has just begun"
"Promise me, son, not to shit your pants and run
Walk away from truthin' if you can
Now threaten everyone who tells you that you're wrong
I hope you're smart enough to have plan
Son, just threaten to murder death 'em if you can"
There's someone for everyone and bhanky's choice was Emmy
In his gimp latex, he didn't have to prove that he was brave
One day while he was lurking, ol' Josh he started truthin'
And when he mentioned Emmy, bhanky proved he was her slave
bhanky opened up the door and he saw Emmy laughin'
It seemed that he'd forgot, to log out of Getbig
The worn out lies, the Dom-Vs online wuz more than she could take now
He reached above the mirrored bed and took down his Batgimp suit
As his tears fell on panties of lace, he heard these words again
"Promise me, son, not to shit your pants and run
Walk away from truthin' if you can
Now threaten everyone who tells you that you're wrong
I hope you're smart enough to have plan
Son, just threaten to murder death 'em if you can"
The mood was tense when he logged on with a dead cat he wauz a-swingin'
Ol' Josh he was a laughin' for he knew he would be banned
When bhanky turned to typin', his wit it was a-stingin'
And he threw in for good measure he would beat up a crippled man
His entire life flew by his eyes as if it were a nightmare
He vowed to murder death 'em all, he'd show them all he can
When bhanky left the G&O, all present wuz a-laughin'
He said, "This one's for Mama", then down the hall he crawled
And his final postin' said...
"I promised to Em that I would fight until I win
I'll never speak the truth not under oath
Now please don't think I'm weak, when I bare both of my cheeks
And grin at you with paddle in your hand
You spankin's this ol' hankins' is so grand"
Everyone considered him the liar of the forum...
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