in honesty I had no real purpose until my mids came along. I am off to pick them up for the summer- I get them today until september 3rd. Cant wait.
I wish I had two more- I've got two and can honestly say they dont give me. a minutes grief.I am 52 and they are 10 and 7. the difference generationally is bizarre.
eg when I was going up everyone used ot fight to see who the 'cock' of the class was. I told my kids about that and they found it hilarious as 'fighting is for losers dad'. my son boxes but says its a sport its fun. my daughter is on arsenals books in their under 12s at 10. I have supported them but nevertold them what to do or talked about winning or losing.
when my ex left it was because I fell out with her sister and over time her sister turned her against us. when we went to court to find them and stop them being taken abroad- her sister said unless i gave her 5k a month she would take them to Africa and sell them. Luckily we got an injunction to stop the sister leaving the country- she is on a terror watch list as she fled the DRC after trying to posion the presidents family at a funeral- batshit crazy.
anyway I had 2 months where I didnt even hear my kids voices. it was harder than any jail time I've done. I sent phones down which got ebayed until Isent a shittiy burner phone down and i was told to call every weds at 3. I did it 5 times and no answer. week 6 I did it and my daughter answered. It was a mixture of sadness anger and elation. I speak to them both for 30 minutes on video every single day without fail and we whatsapp all the time.
My kids have been great for me. My only goal is to do stuff with them and ensure neither of them ever follow me down the path i took. they have survived the last 5 years in inner city London and while I regret ever clapping eyes on their mother and getting married they are a source of constant joy. **
** give it a week I will be up the fucking wall with them!