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Author Topic: Funny Quote  (Read 4658 times)

Dos Equis

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Funny Quote
« on: April 17, 2007, 03:01:25 PM »
On the desk of one of my (female) partners:

Whatever Women Do They Must Do Twice As Well As Men To Be Thought Half As Good. 

Luckily, This Is Not Difficult. 
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Deedee

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2007, 04:28:22 PM »
That was Charlotte Whitton.

Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage. Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly

Ah, women.  They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent. Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Women dress alike all over the world: they dress to be annoying to other women.  Elsa Schiaparelli

Women are afraid of mice and of murder, and of very little in between.  Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #2 on: April 17, 2007, 07:04:55 PM »
some choice ones by wilde

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.


Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.



Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.



Conscience and cowardice are really the same things. Conscience is the trade-name of the firm. That is all.




He lives the poetry that he cannot write. The others write the poetry that they dare not realise.



How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.




I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything.


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24KT

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #3 on: April 17, 2007, 10:49:09 PM »
This quote was framed and hanging in the Vice-Principals office at my highschool.

"Any Women Who Strives to Be Considered A Man's Equal, ...Lacks Ambition!"  ;D
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BuffGoddess

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #4 on: April 18, 2007, 12:57:43 AM »
Here's one of my favorites. It hangs on a plaque over my bed:
No man was ever shot by a woman, while doing the dishes.
My closest male friends who have seen that, howled with laughter...they knew it was true...
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2007, 07:49:39 AM »
Quote from: BuffGoddess on April 18, 2007, 12:57:43 AM
Here's one of my favorites. It hangs on a plaque over my bed:
No man was ever shot by a woman, while doing the dishes.
My closest male friends who have seen that, howled with laughter...they knew it was true...

i have never cooked..cleaned...done laundry or done a single dish in my life..

i vaccuum..i like doing that...its fun..i like picturing little dirt thingies getting sucked up..

anyhow back to my point..just cause i dont do it dosen't mean i expect my girl to do it..
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Laura Lee

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2007, 01:42:39 PM »
Quote from: ProteinFarts! on April 18, 2007, 07:49:39 AM
i have never cooked..cleaned...done laundry or done a single dish in my life..

i vaccuum..i like doing that...its fun..i like picturing little dirt thingies getting sucked up..

anyhow back to my point..just cause i dont do it dosen't mean i expect my girl to do it..

no racial slurs please.   :)
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2007, 01:50:09 PM »
Quote from: Laura Lee on April 18, 2007, 01:42:39 PM
no racial slurs please.   :)


 ???


ooo..the mexican stuff....hey call me cinderellas prince with a shoe..

<shrug>
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Laura Lee

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #8 on: April 18, 2007, 01:55:49 PM »
Quote from: ProteinFarts! on April 18, 2007, 01:50:09 PM

 ???


ooo..the mexican stuff....hey call me cinderellas prince with a shoe..

<shrug>
Nothing wrong with being a prince.  :)
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2007, 02:16:27 PM »
Quote from: Laura Lee on April 18, 2007, 01:55:49 PM
Nothing wrong with being a prince.  :)

i cant cook..clean...do laundry...pour water out of a kettle without spilling...am really slow at tying my laces...am totally lost usually in a grocery store...cant iron my clothes..

i'd die if someone didn't do all that for me  :-[

..well the cooking part..
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dan18

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #10 on: April 23, 2007, 02:53:48 PM »
Quote from: BuffGoddess on April 18, 2007, 12:57:43 AM
Here's one of my favorites. It hangs on a plaque over my bed:
No man was ever shot by a woman, while doing the dishes.
My closest male friends who have seen that, howled with laughter...they knew it was true...
wouldnt it be better in the kitchen? just a thought..
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24KT

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #11 on: April 24, 2007, 03:14:21 PM »
Quote from: dan18 on April 23, 2007, 02:53:48 PM
wouldnt it be better in the kitchen? just a thought..

No, ...he has to see it before he can act on it. It's best hung in the bedroom.  ;)
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #12 on: May 05, 2007, 12:16:40 PM »
Quote from: ProteinFarts! on April 18, 2007, 07:49:39 AM


i vaccuum..i like doing that...its fun..i like picturing little dirt thingies getting sucked up..



I bet you can mow a lawn with perfect stripes too, can't you?
xL
It's all in the wrist action...
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #13 on: May 05, 2007, 12:21:20 PM »
Quote from: Beach Bum on April 17, 2007, 03:01:25 PM
On the desk of one of my (female) partners:

Whatever Women Do They Must Do Twice As Well As Men To Be Thought Half As Good. 

Luckily, This Is Not Difficult. 

[/size]

You have some lovely clever female partners & you're lucky.  Easy...
xL
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #14 on: May 05, 2007, 12:25:49 PM »
Quote from: Deedee on April 17, 2007, 04:28:22 PM
That was Charlotte Whitton.

Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage. Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly

Ah, women.  They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent. Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Women dress alike all over the world: they dress to be annoying to other women.  Elsa Schiaparelli

Women are afraid of mice and of murder, and of very little in between.  Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

sorry for multiple posting, I got banned for that once because i was irritating or overbearing or something...  I'll look it up on the pm's if I really care, I think I was either ranting and raving or just verbose.  It was nice though.  Unfortunately I have an extremely slow and old iMac and I'm across the atlantic, so that's my excuse.  I don't actually know how to do those multiple quote me boxes properly.


Thanks Deedee for knowing the best quotes

not sure whether they're funny though, they're just so really real.
x
etc
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #15 on: May 05, 2007, 12:59:44 PM »
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yo linda i apologise for my stupid comments..i should'nt have posted that shit..sorry that i offended you..it won't happen again babe
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Dos Equis

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #16 on: May 05, 2007, 01:18:30 PM »
Quote from: xxxLinda on May 05, 2007, 12:21:20 PM
[/size]

You have some lovely clever female partners & you're lucky.  Easy...
xL

True, but I have since learned the president of my company (a male) gave this framed quote to all of the female professionals.   :)
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #17 on: May 05, 2007, 01:41:23 PM »
Quote from: Beach Bum on May 05, 2007, 01:18:30 PM
True, but I have since learned the president of my company (a male) gave this framed quote to all of the female professionals.   :)

And you maybe probably have a suspicious feeling that he's slept with all of them? 
Only kidding, I hope and trust that they got to partner level by using their brains?

thanks for making me laugh, I'm being cynical here by the way, not real, although I'd love to know how many of your female partners you reckon slept with the boss in order to get the picture to frame on the wall?

Also:  how much are they getting paid ! ?? !
Same as the male partners?
xL


"Any Women Who Strives to Be Considered A Man's Equal, ...Lacks " 
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Dos Equis

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #18 on: May 06, 2007, 11:11:06 AM »
Quote from: xxxLinda on May 05, 2007, 01:41:23 PM
And you maybe probably have a suspicious feeling that he's slept with all of them? 
Only kidding, I hope and trust that they got to partner level by using their brains?

thanks for making me laugh, I'm being cynical here by the way, not real, although I'd love to know how many of your female partners you reckon slept with the boss in order to get the picture to frame on the wall?

Also:  how much are they getting paid ! ?? !
Same as the male partners?
xL


"Any Women Who Strives to Be Considered A Man's Equal, ...Lacks " 

All of my female partners are brilliant.  They're all smarter than me, which doesn't take much.   :D  And the females who aren't partners are extremely bright too. 

All of them are paid very well, because they are smart, have integrity, and work hard. 
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #19 on: May 06, 2007, 05:51:20 PM »
Quote from: xxxLinda on May 05, 2007, 01:41:23 PM


"Any Women Who Strives to Be Considered A Man's Equal, ...Lacks "  [/color]


i'm more than happy to put a woman on a pedistal...i thrive on it when....when...well i've done it with all the wrong women... :-\




i'm the kinda person that needs somebody to need me and take care of em...in every way...most women cant handle that..or deserve it
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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #20 on: May 06, 2007, 09:02:04 PM »
Quote from: ProteinFarts! on May 06, 2007, 05:51:20 PM

i'm more than happy to put a woman on a pedistal...i thrive on it when....when...well i've done it with all the wrong women... :-\




i'm the kinda person that needs somebody to need me and take care of em...in every way...most women cant handle that..or deserve it

toxie, ...the truth is... most men aren't up to that job.  :(
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ToxicAvenger

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #21 on: May 06, 2007, 09:46:49 PM »
Quote from: jaguarenterprises on May 06, 2007, 09:02:04 PM
toxie, ...the truth is... most men aren't up to that job.  :(

i've always been...

done it 2ice..

been hurt both times...

most women take utterromantic devotion as a sign of weakness..

BOTH were utterly surprised to get dumped..

they thought there ws an "upper hand" involved..theirs..  :-\

there should be no hand..let alone upper ....in a relationship..

i wanted my very own goddess.....thousands of $s later i figured..i got primadonnas..  :(
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24KT

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #22 on: May 06, 2007, 11:44:02 PM »
 :'(
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #23 on: May 07, 2007, 01:28:39 PM »
Quote from: ProteinFarts! on May 06, 2007, 09:46:49 PM
i've always been...

done it 2ice..

been hurt both times...

most women take utterromantic devotion as a sign of weakness..

BOTH were utterly surprised to get dumped..

they thought there ws an "upper hand" involved..theirs..  :-\

there should be no hand..let alone upper ....in a relationship..

i wanted my very own goddess.....thousands of $s later i figured..i got primadonnas..  :(


what are you on, that's not a funny quote...  that's a rant.
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xxxLinda

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Re: Funny Quote
« Reply #24 on: May 07, 2007, 01:31:00 PM »
Quote from: Beach Bum on May 06, 2007, 11:11:06 AM
All of my female partners are brilliant.  They're all smarter than me, which doesn't take much.   :D  And the females who aren't partners are extremely bright too. 

All of them are paid very well, because they are smart, have integrity, and work hard. 


You still haven't answered my query about how many of them slept with the boss.
I'm hoping none (which is why you deflected my question>?
xL
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