need to be registered... would it be possible to cut n paste directly on here?
Hey Bluto I got a few for you
Karate is not to be used aggressively...
Fighting is not the answer
Van Damme does not like being called a Russian
That as soon as you move to Seattle, your Mom will hardly be around.
You can be a Black Belt in Karate and still be a complete wimp (Jase's Dad)
If you stick with Scott, you'll never go hungry.
That when you come back as a ghost, you look nothing like you did when you were alive.
You will get picked on for being 'A Bruce Lee freak'.
That you can't call your home 'home' until you start paying the rent.
RJ will provide
Scott likes to stand in the street eating whole cakes
It takes 10 seconds to fill in forms and sign up with a new dojo
Nothing pisses off a Russian more than being called a Russian.
The answer to unwanted aggression is hauling ass to Seattle.
Red belts have been introduced into the Karate Kyu system.
Dojo's make good fronts for mafia dealings
Scott has his reasons for hating RJ
Karate is not Bruce Lee's jeet kune do
If you're Ian Reilly you only attend an outdoor party for the sake of huging your sister, shaking hands with your friends and most importantly for showing off your brand new trophy. You usually are no where to be found when your students utilize the martial arts you taught them strickly for self defense and competition as a way or form of ensuring Kelly remains "spoken for".
A nice little slow dance is the only medicine needed to put the problems between you and your woman aside.
From Kelly's perspective... you getting harassed, having cake and fruit punch tossed at you, being kicked into a table, choked by the table's leg and refusing to stay at her birthday party after what's just gone down, is grounds for YOU being "a jerk".
Next time this happens... immediately come to your senses, return to her party and apologize to Dean (and everyone else) for what happened. Dean will understand that YOU were out of line and all of the problems between the two of you will be over. You may also find that Scott was only tossing food at you out of concern that you weren't eating or drinking anything. He hates to see anyone go hungry. Which was probably the same reason why Dean kicked you into the table. Obviously, Jason like many of us didn't realize this.
Next time you get your ass kicked... move to Seattle and complain about it at Bruce Lee's grave... after a fight with your Dad you need to move to some old abandoned house... Bruce Lee will be waiting there to train you and then leave w/o saying goodbye.
L.A. Karate wasn't all that impressive.
Seattle Karate wasn't that impressive either considering it only took one man to take on all three of their fighters.
After being trained by Bruce Lee don't spend your time seeking revenge on everyone who's kicked your ass... allow someone else (Van Damme) to run through them for you. Once he's finished you'll find you only need to kick his (Van Damme) ass. Saves time, energy and solves all the problems you were having in one fell swoop.
Never hang around with anyone who lets you buy them lunch at a burger joint. These so called friends are leeching off you over a five dollar meal. You don't deserve this lifestyle. If they can't handle that bill you can only imagine how far they'll go. Instead take a page from those so called friends and manipulate top flight Seattle Karate talent into doing your bidding... like Dean Ramsey, for example.
RJ is Raferred Madison Jefferson the 3rd, which means three generations of RJ's ripped off muscial icons of their generations and tore up dance clubs with flashy moves.
Young love makes RJ wish he was 10 years younger. Luckily he has "plenty of girls" waiting for him. This must be because RJ always will provide and women desire a man with such traits. The only downfall is that RJ usually provides everyone with old abandon houses and karate studios that are out to get you.
- Apparently, Bruce Lee has a lot of free time in the after-life.
- Nobody under the age of two will be allowed to drink in Seattle.
- If you get hit with a drink when your back is turned at a party, chances are it was by the fat kid pretending he's having a conversation.
- Contrary to popular belief, "Don't fight it. It's bigger than the both of us" is not an effective pickup line.
- If you wear a shirt and tie to a pool party, you probably deserve to get your ass kicked.
- If you don't want talk to one of your mother's "bitchy friends", make sure to have a black friend escort you into your house.
- Pissing in a pool is only funny if the fat kid does a cannonball into it afterwards.
- Asking a friend if he "needs any help spelling his name" when he's filling out a form will never be as funny as you think it is.
- The term "No Retreat No Surrender" does not apply when you're being chased off by the middle-aged guy at the local Burger King
