Hey alex bro, what you "feel coming" must be your boyfriends pre cum, stop sucking dick.
JK man
You are something else. You really are trying to compensate for all your shortcomings? Maybe something happend to you when you were a child? Maybe you were neglected mentally and physically, still holding onto the frustration that burns in your heart? Maybe you saw something that you shouldn't have or participated in something that was morally and unlawful that burdens you with guilt and nightmares? There are many things that can cause your paranoia.
You are preoccupied with KING23. When you're at home and the doorbell rings, do you immediately feel suspicious that the person there is going to harm you and could be Alex? When you are walking down the street, do you feel you are being followed by Alex23, sometimes ducking down an ally or running into a store to try and lose him? When you are watching TV, do you feel the person is speaking directly to you from Alex23 and listen intently trying to figure out what Alex23 wants from you? Do you sometimes feel that Alex23 is "stealing" your thoughts and you have no control over it? Because of this, do you sometimes carry a small radio/ipod/walkman/discman/ around to drown out the voices in your head?
I just diagnosed your paranoia, free of charge...you're welcome.
STAY POSITIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!