Author Topic: I need help with a problem regarding 'Sea Monkeys' (Read 25698 times)

gym**rat · « **on:** July 13, 2011, 05:44:27 PM »

I have to wear dress pants for work. I either conduct or attend meetings all week long. When I sit on a vinyl or leather covered chair for over a 1/2 an hour, when I get up I leave what I like to call a "Sea Monkey". A small line of ass and/or ballsack sweat on the seat of the chair.

Yesterday I was sitting next to a pretty good looking woman and was working her a little but when we got up for a break she looked down and seen my sea monkey. That pretty much ruined any chance I had if any. I bath everyday and have even tried baby powder in the morning. The baby powder just turns into cake batter.

Anyone else have this problem and has a solution? I thought of stuffing a slice of Wonder Bread in my shorts to soak it up but that could get messy as well. Pic available on request. Thank you in advance.

Dokey111 · « **Reply #1 on:** July 13, 2011, 05:48:28 PM »

Use it to your advantage. If a girl sees it, just say "Sea Monkey! See? Monkey? Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk!" like Curly.

chunkramwell · « **Reply #2 on:** July 13, 2011, 05:52:36 PM »

try two pairs of underoos

gym**rat · « **Reply #3 on:** July 13, 2011, 05:56:05 PM »

Quote from: chunkramwell on July 13, 2011, 05:52:36 PM

try two pairs of underoos

That could possibly work. Or it could make my ass and sack hotter and make it sweat even more. Hmmmm?

Parker · « **Reply #4 on:** July 13, 2011, 05:56:23 PM »

What type of material are your dress pants made out of? If you are wearing heavier fabrics---the sea Monkey will show up...never had that problem...

Wear lighter weight fabrics so that your "ass" can "breath".

makaveli25 · « **Reply #5 on:** July 13, 2011, 05:58:59 PM »

Quote from: gym**rat on July 13, 2011, 05:44:27 PM

I have to wear dress pants for work. I either conduct or attend meetings all week long. When I sit on a vinyl or leather covered chair for over a 1/2 an hour, when I get up I leave what I like to call a "Sea Monkey". A small line of ass and/or ballsack sweat on the seat of the chair. Yesterday I was sitting next to a pretty good looking woman and was working her a little but when we got up for a break she looked down and seen my sea monkey. That pretty much ruined any chance I had if any. I bath everyday and have even tried baby powder in the morning. The baby powder just turns into cake batter.
Anyone else have this problem and has a solution? I thought of stuffing a slice of Wonder Bread in my shorts to soak it up but that could get messy as well. Pic available on request. Thank you in advance.

gym**rat · « **Reply #6 on:** July 13, 2011, 05:59:45 PM »

They are light. The majority are either Calvin Klein or Ralph Lauren. I hate heavy clothes or thick clothes. The only time I don't leave sea monkeys is when I wear jeans. But can't wear those for work. Thank you though.

Mr. Magoo · « **Reply #7 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:00:28 PM »

best thread ever

Rambone · « **Reply #8 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:01:05 PM »

Quote from: gym**rat on July 13, 2011, 05:44:27 PM

I have to wear dress pants for work. I either conduct or attend meetings all week long. When I sit on a vinyl or leather covered chair for over a 1/2 an hour, when I get up I leave what I like to call a "Sea Monkey". A small line of ass and/or ballsack sweat on the seat of the chair. Yesterday I was sitting next to a pretty good looking woman and was working her a little but when we got up for a break she looked down and seen my sea monkey. That pretty much ruined any chance I had if any. I bath everyday and have even tried baby powder in the morning. The baby powder just turns into cake batter.
Anyone else have this problem and has a solution? I thought of stuffing a slice of Wonder Bread in my shorts to soak it up but that could get messy as well. Pic available on request. Thank you in advance.

kiwiol · « **Reply #9 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:08:47 PM »

Try the "wiping discreetly with the underside of your thigh" technique, where you get up from the chair by laterally moving in the seat to the left or right first, so the hammie part of the pant will wipe it before you stand up

MP · « **Reply #10 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:12:44 PM »

I find I sweat more in loose-fitting boxers than boxer-brief style underwear.

kiwiol · « **Reply #11 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:14:02 PM »

You could also quickly wipe the seat after you get up before anyone sees it, but this only works if you're Superman or The Flash

gym**rat · « **Reply #12 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:14:18 PM »

Quote from: kiwiol on July 13, 2011, 06:08:47 PM

Try the "wiping discreetly with the underside of your thigh" technique, where you get up from the chair by laterally moving in the seat to the left or right first, so the hammie part of the pant will wipe it before you stand up

Funny you mention that because I seriously try and remember to do that. But 1/3 of the time I space it and jump right up. Yesterday was one of those days. And that sweet thing sitting next to me looked right down as I realized it and tried shoving the chair under the table. I was pretty embarrassed. She appeared to be a woman that was more than likely not into Sea Monkeys.

I can't believe no one else has this issue on here. I truely am special, in an ass sweat sort of way.

dov · « **Reply #13 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:16:43 PM »

Summer Swamp Ass is a hell of a thing

The_Iron_Disciple · « **Reply #14 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:20:30 PM »

NO ! You are NOT alone, my friend. I sweat constantly ! Not matter what I wear. Daily showers followed with POUNDS of baby powder do nothin' for me.

I hate it. And, yes, I am bein' very serious. So, with all that bein' said, I, too, am followin' this thread with great interest.

DK II · « **Reply #15 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:20:42 PM »

Try anti-transpirant.

Note though that not sweating in the ball area will cause your balls to overheat and produce less testosterone and sperm.

I say keep on sweating, and when then dump the girls face into the pool of sweat on your seat. She will take in your pheromones and fuck you on the spot without doubt.

Men sweat.

gym**rat · « **Reply #16 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:21:19 PM »

Quote from: dov on July 13, 2011, 06:16:43 PM

Summer Swamp Ass is a hell of a thing

Bad thing is I leave these sea monkeys even in the dead of winter. I have no "off season".

MP · « **Reply #17 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:21:47 PM »

You haven't said if you're carrying any extra lbs.

If so, dropping a few usually helps in the sweat department.

DK II · « **Reply #18 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:21:56 PM »

Drink salvia tea, stops sweating very efficiently.

gym**rat · « **Reply #19 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:22:38 PM »

Quote from: The_Iron_Disciple on July 13, 2011, 06:20:30 PM

NO ! You are NOT alone, my friend. I sweat constantly ! Not matter what I wear. Daily showers followed with POUNDS of baby powder do nothin' for me. I hate it. And, yes, I am bein' very serious. So, with all that bein' said, I, too, am followin' this thread with great interest.

I feel for you brother.

kiwiol · « **Reply #20 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:24:25 PM »

Quote from: gym**rat on July 13, 2011, 06:21:19 PM

Bad thing is I leave these sea monkeys even in the dead of winter. I have no "off season".

I had that problem while I was doing my old job.

I solved it by quitting the job

nasht5 · « **Reply #21 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:24:44 PM »

SIMPLE SOLUTION

as you are about to get out of the chair - twist - your ass on the seat. this will wipe the condensation off the chair seat... see no monkey.

DK II · « **Reply #22 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:24:57 PM »

Quote from: kiwiol on July 13, 2011, 06:24:25 PM

I had that problem while I was doing my old job.

I solved it by quitting the job

Spoken like a real bodybuilder!!!

gym**rat · « **Reply #23 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:25:23 PM »

Quote from: DK II on July 13, 2011, 06:20:42 PM

Try anti-transpirant.

Note though that not sweating in the ball area will cause your balls to overheat and produce less testosterone and sperm.

I say keep on sweating, and when then dump the girls face into the pool of sweat on your seat. She will take in your pheromones and fuck you on the spot without doubt.

Men sweat.

I tried Bodyglide, that made it worse. I researched and found a link that suggested Corn Starch. That shit ended up like I rammed a whole tube of raw biscuits in my ass crack. Not pretty.

gym**rat · « **Reply #24 on:** July 13, 2011, 06:26:14 PM »

Quote from: kiwiol on July 13, 2011, 06:24:25 PM

I had that problem while I was doing my old job.

I solved it by quitting the job

Now that was funny. Wish I could.