Ladies and Gentlemen, I have been asked by one of my graduate students (who also happens to be an IFBB pro) if I would be willing to take some time out of my schedule to set up an account here and pass on some of the pearls of wisdom that made me a force to be reckoned with in the bodybuilding industry for over two decades. It is my privilege to oblige.
I intend to set up and AMA thread in future, as well as share some amusing anecdotes I have from my time as a bodyguard to the stars, but for now I will begin by stating that the path to becoming a successful bodybuilding champion begins by accepting this basic fundamental: STOP DOING DEADLIFTS. I repeat: STOP DOING DEADLIFTS.
What’s that you say? ‘Blasphemy! Stone him!’ Well, first off all, I’d fucking like to see you try. Secondly, I didn’t become murderously huge by ignoring my own advice. The only reason one has for doing the deadlift is if they intend to compete as a strength athlete (feel free to lol at this ambition). Any excuse I hear outside of that will be dismissed with a contemptuous wave of the hand and an order to get out of my face. I have no time for fat men masquerading as athletes by performing a dangerous and ineffective manoeuvre in order justify their mental fragility and inability to successfully implement a diet. Nobody is impressed with the poverty-cam footage you upload onto social media where you attempt to hoist some ridiculous poundage off the ground as your face turns purple and your belly spills out over the top of your lifting belt. Give it up, re-evaluate your life, and get ‘back’ to the basics: High-rep, high-tempo work twice a week (minimum). Weighted pull-ups and dumbbell rows are the key to being able to flare those lats like a cobra to ward off the malevolent masses in the nightclubs, and good-mornings performed on a back extension bench are all that’s needed to work the erector spinae and created that grainy Christmas tree-look without becoming a paraplegic in later life.
I will elaborate on other muscle groups as well as give out some invaluable diet tips in later posts, but for now - class dismissed.