Im sorry if I don’t meet your standard for women 
Gaethje caused me to fuck up the sweet acoustic guitar I was building at lutherie school in GA.
I was running my nice bookmatched bearclaw Sitka spruce top through a thickness sander and checking it w my calipers each time it came out.
My mistake was streaming the then recently aired Gaethje/JZ fight on YouTube on my phone while I was working.
I was so taken by the violence that I just kept running that wood through the sander without checking for thickness (no homo).
So now my little parlor guitar sounds amazing but has a bit of a belly near the bridge, even with 11 gauge strings.
TLDR: I killed my camp counselor in 1979